Great experiences!

Discussion of fashion elements and looks that are traditionally considered somewhat "femme" but are presented in a masculine context. This is NOT about transvestism or crossdressing.

Re: Great experiences!

Postby crfriend » Wed Dec 13, 2017 10:10 am

Daryl wrote:Heh, then why do we still allow smoking, and hockey?

Tradition? The former is pernicious to the core, but it's somehow hard to imagine Canada sans hockey.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Daryl » Fri Dec 15, 2017 7:14 pm

crfriend wrote:
Daryl wrote:Heh, then why do we still allow smoking, and hockey?

Tradition? The former is pernicious to the core, but it's somehow hard to imagine Canada sans hockey.


Or the reverse, for that matter (though the Muricans, Swedes and Rooskies certainly measure up).
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Rocketdawg » Mon Jun 04, 2018 4:31 pm

skirtingtoday wrote:I too am one of those men who wears skirts when wife is not around. I understand that it is secretive but as has been mentioned above, "out if sight, out of mind" is very much the scenario here.
I feel she does know that I wear skirts outside but we don't talk about it. She does accept that I wear tights and a long T-shirt (which I think looks like a mini-dress) in the house or at least I thought so. Today she commented disparaging "In the knobbly knees contest today" shook her head and said "I don't know!"h :(


Hey all Rocketdawg here, I started this thread. I also have to hide it. My wife does accept me wearing leggings with a longer shirt in public. She suspected me of wearing a skirt and found a selfie on my phone that I forgot to delete. She searched the house and found my skirt stash and trashed them. She was IRATE and basically I was given the ultimatum to don't ever do it again or our 36 year marriage is DONE! There is much to consider in a 36 year marriage and what matters most as we have a pretty good relationship over all, some beautiful acreage, home, shop and other things that we have accumulated over the years and plan to eventually retire here. I had considered bringing it out to her earlier as suggested but as I realized there is no possible way that she would ever tolerate it. I promised to "knock it off" and never wear a skirt again. Easier said than done once you have experienced wearing them and have had positive reaction to it. I travel for work often and do once again wear a skirt while not on the job. I have to decide if I should continue and if/when caught again is the marriage worth wearing a skirt? You guys that have even some acceptance from your significant other are SO LUCKY!
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Fred in Skirts » Mon Jun 04, 2018 8:29 pm

After 3 failed marriages, mostly because I would not change my life to fit what they wanted me to be, this had nothing to do with skirts either. I decided that I did not want to go through this again and became a confirmed batchler. "Most" women do not want you as you were when they married you they married you because they wanted to make you into what they wanted you to be.

Men it seems do not know nor understand this and end up either being whipped into shape by the woman and when they decide to do something "THEY" want to do find that the woman has other plans and uses the DIVORCE threat to instill obedience of the man, or end up divorced before the damage has gone to far.
In my case it took 3 attempts before I realized the truth and there for the problem. I could not be changed.

I sure did love all three of them when I married them but as they kept trying to make me in the image they wantted me to be and I kept resisting the love slowly left and I became single once again.

So if you have been married for more than 7 years and you have toed the line she has set in the sand, you will have to continue toeing that line or face divorce and heart break!!!

That is just the way it is.
Fred :kiltdance:

:whistle: Hi I am Fred and I wear skirts and dresses all of the time. :hooray:
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Sinned » Tue Jun 05, 2018 12:31 pm

RD, I empathise as I am in a similar situation. Her reaction was a bit extreme! Whilst MOH has not trashed my skirts, and probably wouldn't, my skirt wearing is under a bit of a storm at the moment. Read about it in the "Inversions" thread. I have packed some of them away in a box. I guess that some just aren't open minded enough to accept anything out of the ordinary. As they say, hang in there, it has been prophesied that the Jews will rebuild their Temple on the same site as currently occupied by another structure revered by Moslems. It's difficult to know how it is going to happen but prophecy is prophecy and the Jews seem to know that it will happen. So if the Jews can rebuild their Temple in impossible circumstances then maybe our other halves will eventually, and impossibly, be converted to the faith. I do what I can when I can and how I can and can't do any more than that. :D
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Rocketdawg » Tue Jun 05, 2018 1:54 pm

Thanks "Fred" and "Sinned" for your comments on the situation. I agree Fred, had it been earlier in my marriage I would have drawn my own line, unfortunately I found skirts a while later in the relationship. I have been successful over the years in gaining her acceptance for pierced ears, wearing leggings and polished toe nails in public among friends, ("kind of" on the polish depending on the color). She sees skirts as just another step to "Gay" or cross dressing. I know I'm not Gay (not a bad thing) and not on my way to it. I have dressed up for Halloween as a woman and I am happy to leave it at that, I don't make a good looking woman anyway!
I'm just tired of being pushed into the corner with what society says guys can only wear pants. long baggy cargo shorts, tee shirts, polos, button up shirts and boring shoes all in their own drab shade of color. It seems that the only acceptance for a straight guy who likes bright colors is if it's on his BAD ASS car, motorcycle, boat, etc. Take the BAD ASS out of it and the same color will be looked down upon as "Femme" and odd. I am a creative person in a lot of things and NEED an outlet for it. I don't want to be like anyone else. I want to follow the beat of my own drum (I am a drummer and vocalist) but society and my wife say that I can't!
When I have the opportunity I greatly enjoy wearing skirts with or without nylons/leggings, polished toes and earrings (studs). I'm not afraid to stand in line at the buffet in front of dozens of people, or walk into a biker bar wearing a skirt. I've done both numerous times with and with out weird looks but most times acceptance in conversation about normal everyday things and no questions. I have been accused of being the "bouncer" at a bar once. I guess they figure a 6'- 220 lb. guy with broad shoulders and an athletic body can wear whatever he wants, who's going to say differently! Some day I hope to randomly see another guy in a skirt. Until then and after I'll keep showing what's possible if you have the guts "balls" to just do it! BTW I'm in the mid-west USA.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby moonshadow » Wed Jun 06, 2018 2:45 am

Now lets have a little fun and change a few words around and see how this flies society it large, feel free to copy it and paste it into any online place you wish and watch as the public gasp and demands that you're beheaded and disgraced as a sexist pig:

Jane Doe wrote:Hey all Jane here, I started this thread. I also have to hide it. My husband does accept me wearing leggings with a flannel shirt in public. He suspected me of wearing pants and found a selfie on my phone that I forgot to delete. He searched the house and found my pants stash and trashed them. He was IRATE and basically I was given the ultimatum to don't ever do it again or our 36 year marriage is DONE! There is much to consider in a 36 year marriage and what matters most as we have a pretty good relationship over all, some beautiful acreage, home, garden and other things that we have accumulated over the years and plan to eventually retire here. I had considered bringing it out to him earlier as suggested but as I realized there is no possible way that he would ever tolerate it. I promised to "knock it off" and never wear pants again. Easier said than done once you have experienced wearing them and have had positive reaction to it. I travel for work often and do once again wear pants while not on the job. I have to decide if I should continue and if/when caught again is the marriage worth wearing pants? You girls that have even some acceptance from your significant other are SO LUCKY!


Now imagine this in virtually any online forum where women frequent.... I do wonder what the replies would be???

I'm sure "CALL THE POLICE" would be in the comments somewhere....! :roll: :|
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby moonshadow » Wed Jun 06, 2018 2:55 am

Oh look... I found one!
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20061005171652AAmGRwu&guccounter=1

Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce
Little Angel
Any women on here not allowed to wear pants? My husband won't let me, i've pleaded, how do you respond?
Sometimes my husband will take me out to the mall and I will see all these pretty women wearing these cute little jeans and I have asked my husband he would get me a pair and he said no :( He tells me that pants are for men and look too immodest on women. My dad told me the same thing so I have never been able to wear them. I guess I'm being a brat by me still asking every now and then but I guess I just wish I could wear jeans just once in a while, maybe every third Friday or something. Do you think there is anything I could say to my husband that would make him change his mind? If not, any tips for being content with dresses and skirts?


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Answers
Relevance
avigirl
Best Answer: I don't know what your situation is but it does seem a little strange to many people that you would have to ask your husband for permission to wear jeans. The reason it seems strange is that it appears there may be other issues at hand here other than what to wear. I am concerned that this is only a tip of the iceberg on a variety of control issues. A relationship should be based on mutual respect and a marriage should be a partnership between these types of individuals. As an outsider it makes me think that this issue could lead to mental (maybe physical) abuse that you are not conscience of. I would greatly encourage you to seek professional help. If you aren't comfortable with that - try a spiritual/religious advisor. However, for the short-term, tell your husband that you appreciate his concern but you are an adult and you appreciate his ability to respect your wishes to wear what is comfortable to you since that will reflect on your relationship with him. If you are comfortable - you will be happy - and you will be happier together. After all tell him, "I'm sure you only want to make me happy"

But please go and talk to someone - No person should ever have to deal with something like this from their significant other.


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Wow .If this is for real ?.I`m totally floored by this one . I hope he doesn't make you wear haybandbras. Another thing that's wrong is why do you have ask your husband if he will buy them for you ??? One good trick might be is to tell him that sometimes when its windy your dress blows up and that its really embarrassing. After all if he's worried about modesty he certainly won't want others catching a glimpse of your nether wear . In Japan a lot young girls started wearing mini skirts over the top of their jeans due to men always leering at their bottoms .Another idea might be to buy some denim and make your own (Keep them hidden though ) bit sneaky huh.but . Or you could try callottes . hope this helped
izumi c · 1 decade ago


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You know if I wasn't sitting in front of a computer reading this, I'd swear your question was from a woman in the 1800's. What do you mean your husband won't let you wear pants? Wear whatever the hell you feel like wearing, and if has a problem with that tell him to take a running jump at a rolling donut. He sounds controlling and abusive. Marriage is a team project, and he sounds like the team leader in your relationship. You need to assert yourself. If you do buy pants and wear them, what is your husband going to do, punish you? If he does, you need to dump him, and fast. He is not your father, your boss, or a disciplinarian. You deserve a man who thinks he is the luckiest guy on the planet for having found you. You deserve to have a man treat you like a queen, not like a step child. If you buy pants and he harms you, either emotionally or physically, leave him. If the abuse is physical, call the police.You married a major JERK honey. It does not sound like he is going to change. It'stime to wear the pants yourself and kick him in his. Good Luck.
Mr. Grudge · 1 decade ago


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I am so confused as to why you let anybody treat you like this. You are a person. People have rights. Freedom of expression. He must be higher than a kite for thinking that you would be semi OK with this and you must be higher than a kite for letting someone dress you. This is such bull! I am thinking that you had surgery to get your backbone removed. Does he have control issues? I know that you are female but, you really need to get a pair! I am not talking pants. However, that wouldn't hurt, either.
Talk to him about this, find out why he doesn't think that you should be wearing pants. Tell him why you want to wear pants. Tell him how much you love him and that he is wonderful. Then, after your talk buy pants and wear them. Take him out to dinner but demand on wearing your pants, that YOU bought. Do you have a job? Yes? Buy pants. No? Get one and buy pants.
Colleen · 1 decade ago


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Why is he so controlling? What makes him the boss of you that you have to do what he says? You are an equal just like he is. What if you told him he had to wear a suit and tie every day of his life? How would he react to that? Not very well, I'm sure. Is he abusive? I think I would just tell him you are tired of being manipulated and controlled by him, you are in this marriage 50 50 and you have your own mind and can do whatever you want. Does he have some kind of hold on you that makes you do what he says? He seems like some kind of dictator.
lazycat · 1 decade ago


And it goes on and on and on and on... pages of pages of this....
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Freedomforall » Wed Jun 06, 2018 3:24 am

And so the double standard insanity goes. My ex would do everything she could to publicly humiliate me, up to and including notifying my employer.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby beachlion » Wed Jun 06, 2018 3:47 am

A great find Moon. I have mailed the Yahoo question to my wife but also the her best friend. Those two are the main negative factors in my skirt wearing. Let's see what happens. ;)
All progress takes place outside the comfort zone - M J Bobak
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby jamodu » Wed Jun 06, 2018 10:02 am

How to Tell Your Wife She’s a Crossdresser
You’ve pondered doing this for a long time, and now you think you’re ready. It may be one of the most difficult conversations you’ll ever have with your wife, but in your heart you know it must be done, for the sake of your marriage. Before you open up the discussion, you must be sure of many things. We will discuss those things below, please make sure you have read them all before attempting to break this potentially shocking news to your wife.

Women and Crossdressing
Despite public perception, most experts agree that as many as 99.9% of women crossdress. Your wife may be highly defensive about her crossdressing secret, but you must remain strong and power through the dialog. Above all, make it clear that you still love and adore her despite the fact that she occasionally enjoys wearing men’s clothing. It may take a little bit of coercion to get her to admit that she is a crossdresser, but it can be done.

Some Helpful Hints & Tips
Whatever you do, don’t insinuate that how she is dressing is in any way perverted, disgusting or deviant. Make sure that you tell her that you can understand why she wants to wear men’s clothing, but that it may take some time and long heart-felt talks to completely understand the psychology behind it. Ensure that you will stand by her side despite what family and friends may say and that you do not judge her negatively for enjoying the feeling of a nice pair of slacks. Above all else, avoid calling her a freak.

Why Do Women Crossdress?
Doctors and scientists cannot seem to agree on a single cause for women wanting to crossdress but some say that it is the allure of mundane designs, scratchy fabrics and unflattering cuts. One thing is clear, though — you must embrace your crossdressing wife. Here are some measures that you can take to really make her feel more comfortable with this shameful secret. Allow her to keep her men’s clothing out in the open instead of hidden away. Encourage her by picking up some items for her next time you go shopping. And if you are ready, allow her to crossdress in front of you.

What Does the Crossdresser Woman Want?

Here are some particularly snazzy articles of clothing that appeal to the crossdressed woman — casual trousers, button down shirts, polo (golf) shirts, suit trousers, denim jeans, hooded sweaters (hoodies), t-shirts with music band logos, athletic socks, boyshorts, boybriefs, girly boxers, sneakers (gym shoes), trainers, baseball caps, tank tops (a-shirts), suit jackets, fedoras, bowties, waistcoats and sports jerseys. Keep in mind that there are even some women’s clothing manufacturers that are designing entire fashion lines mainly inspired by men’s wear. This may be an easy 'buffer zone' that will make the transition to more traditional men’s clothing much simpler. However, be careful, as these types of clothing have been known to cause mild addiction to wearing men’s outfits.

Best of Luck
I hope that this article has helped you to get started in the journey that is your wife’s crossdressing. If nothing else, remember that you exchanged vows and promised to love her in good times and bad. I am sure that with some serious dedication, you two can move forward and perhaps even enjoy your wife’s gender-bending preferences.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Sinned » Wed Jun 06, 2018 11:36 am

Moon, thanks for that Yahoo question session. At first I thought it the answer to my prayers but on second thoughts ....

.... The difference between that and our situation is that, although the woman poser is asking to wear jeans, they are otherwise "acceptable" wear for women. From the social more pov the reverse is not the case. That is the perception is that it is not acceptable for men to wear skirts and that's where it all breaks down. I can guarantee that if I show this to MOH then she will say that the thread is ridiculous and that I would still be asking to wear an article of clothing that men just don't normally wear. I admit that the responses show the double standard clearly and that may sway her but I doubt it. I will show the thread to her but I just don't think that it will make any difference.

jamodu, thanks also for your contribution but I know that MOH doesn't think that she's a crossdresser. She has maintained that whet she wears is designed and made for women. She doesn't wear any of my clothes, be it jumpers, shirts or anything else. The leggings, socks, tops she wears - none of which come from the other side of the aisle. This means that I have no ammunition to say that she is wearing men's clothes. So again, I don't think that the article would make the slightest difference.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby jamodu » Wed Jun 06, 2018 1:19 pm

After many years of married life, it was this Vernon Coleman article that I asked my Wife to read that finally changed her attitude to my wearing clothes originating from the other side of the aisle. It worked for me, but I fully appreciate that it wouldn't necessarily work for others here.

http://www.vernoncoleman.com/soupset.htm
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby moonshadow » Wed Jun 06, 2018 4:13 pm

Good article jamodu, thanks for sharing it.


Dennis, I hate to say it but after all this time it doesn't look like she's going to change her position on this.

I'm not saying you should wreck your life over this.... But I am saying that basically at this juncture "it is what it is"... Your wife seems ridiculously stubborn over this, and after all of these points we've made over the years, if she's hasn't budged a lick yet, something tells me she probably wont at all.

I know the frustration to an extent... my mother is like this, and for whatever reason it's like the just build this impentratbale wall around the issue and they just outright REFUSE to see reason.

It's like the want you to be a "modern man" respectful of women's rights, progressive, gentle and so on. And yet the seek to dominate over us in the exact same manner that men have dominated women through the centuries. People like mom and your wife seem uninterested in what makes us happy and content. In their mind our primary function is to not embarrass them and be the good trophy husband (or son in my case)

It's all about image.

That's why when these people start going on about western culture and our "freedom's I tell them to stick it up their ass. We're not free. So long as there is prejudice and bigotry nobody will ever be free.
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Re: Great experiences!

Postby Sinned » Wed Jun 06, 2018 6:03 pm

Yeah, I agree with you that it seems like she's not going to change her mind but wearing a skirt is now just so much a part of me and my character that I would find it difficult to give up. So I will keep trying. There will be a way to get through to her, I just haven't found the right way yet. Like RocketDawg and others I need my skirts and tops but, and this is something that undermines my arguments, apart from leggings she doesn't really wear anything that a man would wear only women's things or those that would be considered unisex. So I can't even say to her "Look, you're wearing a man's garment." I feel frustrated at the moment, depressed a bit and sad but I'm not finished yet, I'll just have to be more careful. Another thing that frustrates me is that I encourage her to search the internot for sites about men wearing skirts but, as far as I know, she hasn't done so and to me shows no interest in doing so.

She doesn't know that I have boxed up some of my skirts, but it's only a small part of my collection. At least my wardrobe isn't groaning so much.

P.s. I agree about the freedom bit. I'm not free, not by a long chalk.
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