RyeOfTheDead wrote:Chris, I'm glad you said it, because I was trying to figure out how to word it without setting off a flame war, but I think people are being a bit hard on Silky. I mean heck, even before I started publicly wearing skirts, I was much more likely to ask my female friends for fashion feedback than I was my guy friends.
I don't believe that this thread is necessarily headed towards Flameville, so long as we remain civil to one another.
Now, certainly if a guy is going to "push boundaries" in the fashion sense, he's pretty much going to have to ask for tips and advice on how to deal with the
very different "toolkit" that skirts demand. This is not necessarily sexist, either; it's realism because in what passes for "western culture" men don't wear skirted garments (we're trying to change that), haven't worn skirted garments in several hundred years, and so the familiarity with the "toolkit" is long gone from the male consciousness. It takes a real force of will to develop skirted looks that "work" with each individual's aesthetic -- and that sense of taste and style varies dramatically with each individual.
Note, too, that just because one is asking a woman for advice does not mean you may actually get
cogent advice. There are plenty of women in the western world now who are as illiterate in the "ways of the skirt" as guys are -- these are the women who may have worn skirts once or twice in their lives but mostly live in trousers. Ask a die-hard tomboy about skirts and you'll get (stereotypical) guy-style answers.
However, Men dress for women, usually, unless it's the case of like a status thing, someone might wear colors for a street rep type thing, or a power suit for a business situation, but in general (straight) guys are usually dressing to impress potential sexual partners.
Then why, pray tell, is men's typical "everyday" costume so mind-numbingly boring? Does one really suppose that prospective partners go for the blandest of the bland? I'd suspect not, but common custom today is about as sartorially boring as it gets. This can work to some guys' advantage -- especially if they positively shine in other areas that a prospective mate might find attractive -- but really the style amounts to the equivalent of the male burqha.
[... S]ometimes on these groups, or more so on places like flickr, I see pictures posted that I look at and think "Wow, that just looks atrocious" and then there's all these comments that just say "Hey great!" "Way to go!" or similar feedback. I'm not a big fan of personally criticizing people online so I usually just don't say anything when I see it, and hope that my own looks are better.
To my mind, when putting together an outfit for the first time, I actually do think carefully about whether it "hits the mark" I want it to. That mark is a complex point that includes whether the outfit accurately communicates something about me basic personality, whether it communicates the impresion I'm trying to make with it (if there is one), and ultimately -- and most importantly -- whether it
looks good. Sometimes I nail it -- and sometimes I manage to lay a real egg. However, if I find I want a new outfit, I am not averse to experimentation -- and with experimentation comes risk. If I was risk-averse, I'd wear nothing but white shirts and black trousers -- absolutely safe, mind you, and completely within my aesthetic, but
boring.
Most of the problems I have, and this seems to be a common problem for guys, is how to achieve the proper balance so one looks neither top-heavy or bottom-heavy -- and that's very individual to each man's body type. Bob wrote a good critique of the looks that appeared in the
Daily Mail article, and brought up good points why each worked or failed. Further muddying the waters is how to get both the balance right
and get the colours to work well -- all of a sudden we're facing a colour pallette that dwarfs what we're used to dealing with. I'm not afraid of colour, but may have some very subtle perception problems and most of my worst efforts are in the realm of colour (especially blues). So there's another pitfall to drop into.
In short, second opinions are valuable and useful tools, but it's also important that one implicitly trust the one that is asked for it. And, ultimately, if you think it looks good, and you're happy and comfortable with it, that will come through and assist in blunting any flaws that others may perceive (and a guy in a skirt is going to get looked at immediately as a bit "flawed").
All I can say is, if *you* like the way an outfit looks on you, it will make you feel good, and the better you feel, the better you'll look; it's a self-feeding thing. 
