The joys of the English language

[Sarongman]

When Dr. Johnson wrote his Dictionary, the American and English spellings were exactly the same. It is the English spelling that diverged into a frenchified (I think that word works) form by making meter into metre. While we're in the dictionary, here beginneth some quotes from the good Doctor.
MATHEMATICKS That science which contemplates whatever is capable of being numbered or measured, and is either pure or mixt: pure considers abstracted quantity, without any relation to matter; mixt is interwoven with physical considerations.

In the Shorter Oxford (Not that short--2 vols weighing in at 7.1 kg) a bawdy House is archaic a brothel-- where prostitutes work.

Dr. J says "a house where traffick is made by wickedness and debauchery.
Who is more colourful then?

[the_scott_meister]

Oofta, it doth go on interminably, dothn't it?

I've got two routers, one spins a bit to cut out wood, another allows me to access this site. But my inlaws live on Route 66 (pronounced "root" - anyother way is just crazy wrong, it's even in the song). Someone once said that we're tied to a language make makes up for in obscurity what it lacks in style. I think, however, that it has both in abundance.

BTW, an aunt is an ant, no matter how many legs she's got, at least in pronunciation anyway.

[Jock]

I have an Uncle and an Aunt.
Are they six legged?
Indeed they aren't!

For working wood I have a router
But for my skill I am a doubter
I'm not about to blow my hooter
concerning my new wifi router

It's the differences that bind us together - Anon

BTW - I always thought a brothel was a soup kitchen

Slainte!

[Sarongman]

"You say eether, I say eyether" as the song goes.

I always thought a brothel was a soup kitchen

Has anyone heard the instructions to foreign visitors to England by a now dead comedian where mattresses were to be aired by pushing out the window and brothels were advertised by a blue light and blue and white checked sign?

[Stevie D]

Has anyone heard the instructions to foreign visitors to England by a now dead comedian where mattresses were to be aired by pushing out the window and brothels were advertised by a blue light and blue and white checked sign?

You mean Gerard Hoffnung, I think.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sq-q6TcbHLE
Advice for tourists starts at about 4':50"

However, my favourite of his is the bricklayer's sick leave request.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI8ft3oZAik

[Tor]

Jock, nice way to show the proper pronunciation of those words. I'll have to keep it in mind to send to people, as I do know a few who could use it.

Tor

[Sinned]

I also like the richness of the English language when it comes to humour. Many jokes play upon sounds in the context of different words. An example.

Why are there no painkillers in the bird's aviary?
Because the parrots eat em all. ( Say it out loud. )

Or

What kind of sandals do frogs wear? Open toad.

Other jokes depend upon the word in a different context.

I saw a magic tractor the other day. It was driving down the road and all of a sudden turned into a field.

And more.

Why is ….

…. abbreviation such a long word?

…. dyslexia so hard to spell?

…. lisp spelt with an ‘s’?

…. phonetic spelt with a ‘ph’?

…. there an ‘i’ in blind?

…. brail consisting of a bunch of raised dots? Why not just make the letters raised and save the hassle of learning brail?

…. Evian still being bought at exorbitant prices when evian is naïve spelt backwards?

…. there no comparison website to compare comparison websites?

…. shortcut so long?

Sinned

[Grok]

I believe that there was a recent inquiry about this thread.