Barn dance

[Charlie]

I took my wife to a barn dance at Barton St. David, which is in deepest Somerset the other week. It was in the skittle alley of a pub, and most of the dancers were young farmers – young, full of energy, enthusiasm and beer. My wife wore a floaty skirt, I wore a black corduroy Union kilt (we knew we'd get hot with dancing – pity the rest of them in their jeans).

The caller knows us, so we became the 'experts' to demonstrate the dances. The kilt got plenty of exposure.

There were only two comments about the kilt:

When I walked in to the skittle alley, a guy at the bar said something like 'Oh, its a kilt!' Perhaps he mistook it for a skirt. This has happened before; next time I really must ask 'what would you think if it had actually been a skirt?'.

The second reference to the kilt was when a mum was telling her son who to follow. 'The man in the skirt' she said, as a means of identification. (I'd hope he follows me in kilt/skirt wearing as well.)

At the end of the evening we were complemented on our dancing. Perhaps there's a small corner of Somerset with a guy thinking 'I could wear one of those'. I think sometimes that putting the kilt/skirt in front of people makes them aware that they exist as an alternative to trousers for men. Shame so few seem to receive the message.

Charlie

[iain]

It's interesting, how even exposure to guys in skirts doesn't have the sometimes expected effect of getting a guy to try it.

The reason, as far as I can figure it out, is that the idea is tantamount to getting on stage. You can go on stage as much as you like, but people watching you who are of an audience mindset will stay in the audience, and prefer to be bystanders.

This isn't because they don't approve of what you're doing up there -- they do, and they might well enjoy seeing it -- but because they don't want to be the centre of attention, or, more specifically, perhaps they don't want their masculine persona to be the centre of attention.

People stay in comfortable situations, such as crappy relationships or go-nowhere jobs, because they are familiar. In the mass mind, familiarity and safety are prized above progress. This is a good thing in that it stabilises society to some extent; society won't suddenly veer alarmingly off to one side, en masse, unless perhaps under the sway of a demagogue, and even then they tend to right themselves within a decade or so. So society is reasonably stable thanks to the inability of most people to move an inch away from their accustomed rut. Hence the frustration and challenges awaiting a true reformer.

It takes a certain type to break the mold, even for themselves! In any one area when it is safe to be a rebel, then true rebels will look for something else to do!

[crfriend]

It's interesting, how even exposure to guys in skirts doesn't have the sometimes expected effect of getting a guy to try it.

Well, I suspect that it may come down to the fact that most guys are amazingly fragile in their confidence when it comes to appearing different from most other guys. One bloke in a skirt may be enough to trigger a rational (i.e. reasoned) reaction, but may not be enough to push the feeling, emotional mind over the edge.

Face it, the notion that a bloke can wear a skirt in public simply hasn't percolated down to the general populace yet -- there aren't enough chaps willing to be "out in the front lines"; there's no critical mass yet. Hopefully this'll happen someday. I try to do my part, but I'm just one stranger amongst millions.....