decline of dance culture

[timemeddler]

Historically and at least as recently as the disco era men had no issues going dancing. But looking at it from my perspective it's almost as difficult today as convincing them to try a skirt. According to the older people at my club, decades ago there were tons of people dancing, but it seems it tended to be more popular with women. What's so different now? Women don't appear to have as much of an issue going dancing, why do guys? I've heard a lot of this boils down to embarrassment or being self conscious, but that would hardly be unique to this era. Any theories?

[Spirou003]

Talking from my personal perspective, it's a combination of factors that makes me to never go dancing.
There's some fear of trying something new alone, being let alone during the class or even worse being refused the class because "you must come with your partner" (which I already read on some advertisement). I would preferably dance with a woman than with a man, but in my circle there's not any woman so going accompanied is highly unlikely.
Not only but also, I hardly find time for "outside" sport activity. Example with swimming, I went a few times in July/August and now say "I should go again". Problem: I need to walk more than 30 min to get there, so one session is nearly three hours. I need to find a way to combine that sport activity with something else, to not feel like I'm losing my time in deplacements (I don't have driver licence). Walking is not a problem for me (I can easily walk 10 km at once), save that it is boring as hell.
Last but not least, I have knees issues since one year and I'm still looking for a solution to it (up to know, no medical examen did find anything), which definitely stops me from even thinking about dancing (which I would like to). I have had an appointment last week to a sport's doctor, she has an idea and suggested some kine that will start tomorrow, wait and see but it's not going to resolve before weeks or months.
Way before the knees issue, I've contacted a pole dancing club to check whether or not they would accept me in their classes (I was willing to try it out). Reason? In their website, they only speak about "the girls/women", never about "dancers" or about "males". I was afraid it was a "girl only club" and asked (among other questions). The person who answered to my email did not answer that specific question, but answered all the other questions and kept speaking about "the girls/women". I never went to that club: if they're not even capable of reading correctly and understand that they're speaking to a man who doesn't know whether he would be accepted or not in what looks like a "female-only club", then it is a club I don't want to join. The pity is that I was walking upfront that club every single day when coming back from work, meaning that it would virtually have taken zero "deplacement time" to get in that club!

In aswer to your remark about amount of women in dance classes: not related to dance classes, I discovered last year that in sport's groups, women are generally more beautiful than the "average woman". It has been a pleasant surprise when I participated to city runnings (as part of my jogging workouts), I didn't expected anything in this regard (I was like "I'm going to do my workout, and eventually chat with a few people in the same time"). This has been confirmed by my few swimming sessions of this summer.

[Barleymower]

Historically and at least as recently as the disco era men had no issues going dancing. But looking at it from my perspective it's almost as difficult today as convincing them to try a skirt. According to the older people at my club, decades ago there were tons of people dancing, but it seems it tended to be more popular with women. What's so different now? Women don't appear to have as much of an issue going dancing, why do guys? I've heard a lot of this boils down to embarrassment or being self conscious, but that would hardly be unique to this era. Any theories?

There has been a definite change in culture TM. I can't really say why but I do know what happened.
In 1983 I was 18, we used to meet on a Friday at a pub, drink and chat until 10 and then go to a club, a disco. You had to dress up a bit or you wouldn't get in. More beer, try and chat a few girls up, shake your funky stuff on the dance floor. Maybe you would get lucky, mostly you ended up kissing your kebab.
Life was still good and virtually the same in 1993. Different music but largely the same.
Between 1995 and 2007 I noticed that younger people weren't so interested in clubs or discos anymore. Licencing laws had changed, pubs could open longer, you didn't need to go to a club anymore for a late night pint. There was less and less dancing in discos and shift to pub drinking and calling it a night at 12.
Others might disagree but I think the smoking ban in 2007 really killed it. No more posing about with a packet of B&H, sharing your fag's (cigarettes) with you mates. Atmosphere was lost that could not be replaced with smoke machines.
Still if you see someone with lung cancer it's not a pretty sight.

Dancing was integral to the mating ritual, it was played out in teen discos, night clubs and sad old smelly places where old people went for a second (or 100th) chance of love. We all danced then because dancing got you laid.

I met my wife in 1999 so that put paid to my boozy dancing. It was probably for the best

Edit:
After all that, I didn't meet her in a disco. She was a temp receptionist where I was working. The rest is history

[moonshadow]

I've not seen anyone bust a move out west as if yet, but back east I'd sometimes see people dancing out in public, especially if there's a shindig going on.

I myself have been known to cut a little rug from time to time in my old living room.

These days I don't want t obe a bother to the neighbors, but sometimes I think about just pulling in some out of the way corner of some parking lot, turning on some music and letting loose. I've seen a few people do this over the years.

https://youtube.com/shorts/HesNAoIDlwo? ... g7nV0GYdQU

I heard there is (or was) a bluegrass festival somewhere around here. I'd like to attend it if it's not too late... see how west coast bluegrass stacks up against that which can be heard back on the home circuit.

[Seb]

When I was around my 20ies we used to go out dancing, but I think it just devolved into just drinking yourself wasted with your mates when the internet took over as the primary location to find a partner.
I don't hear about people interacting with strangers when they are out at clubs/bars anymore, you hang out with the people you came with.

[Myopic Bookworm]

When I bought my first kilt, a friend discovered that I had it, and insisted that I should go to a class in Scottish country dancing. I can thoroughly recommend it. You don't need to go with a partner, and any imbalance of sexes works in your favour. It helped me secure a date with a girl I had already met through choral singing ;-D And you'll never feel out of place in a kilt.

[FranTastic444]

“Men had no issue going dancing” is a sweeping generalization. This man has always been crippled with embarrassment at the prospect of dancing - I just look totally dumb whenever I have tried.

As per the reply from BM, I went to clubs from about’88 to mid-late 90’s and in my case at least it was predominantly so I could keep drinking into the wee small hours. Being cripplingly shy and socially awkward, I had no expectations that I’d meet up with any female company there.

My experience at social gatherings such as weddings, parties etc is that women lead the March to the dance floor and significantly outnumber men throughout the event. This has always been so - from my earliest memories as a kid to date. But that’s just the social circles I orbits in - I’m sure that others have a different experience.

There is a lot of dancing on social media (“reels” in particular). Take a look at Charli D'Amelio, for example. I have a few FB connections who take their kids to dancing completions (either couples / ballroom style or teams / groups) and this is something I wasn’t aware of as being a thing in years gone by. I think that plenty of young (and not so young) adults still go to festivals, raves, clubs etc to dance.

[DrFishnets]

With being a musician I’ve always wanted to dance and go to dance lessons but I am a shy guy and feel very self conscious dancing. It’s a shame because I reckon dancing would be good therapy for my anxiety and depression just like what wearing skirts, dresses and tights is for me. However, I found wearing skirts, dresses, tights and leggings made me feel self conscious until I wore them all the time and now I enjoy wearing them and I don’t give a damn what other people think.

[Uncle Al]

Way back in college, I took a Social Dance Class as a P.E. course. It was FUN
I ended up with some 'free-time', so I attended another class, as a proctor. This
class was about one week behind my class, in the different styles of ballroom dance.
(Styles = Foxtrot, Waltz, Swing, Tango, Rhumba etc. )

Anyway, the teacher of the 'slower' class, put me with a young lady who, the teacher said,
was failing the class. I worked with her, getting her to relax - let the music flow, let your
emotions flow with the music, to "feel the music".

"Things" progressed and by the end of the semester, this young lady had passed the
course with a B+, and an engagement ring from me. Counting the year we spent
before the wedding, we were together for 50 years at her passing.
(1 year engaged, 49 years married).

So - - Good Things do come from dancing.

Remember - Listen to the music It has a message for your heart and soul.

Uncle Al