Skirts are not for attention seeking

[DrFishnets]

I remember reading a long time ago about men who wear skirts and dresses do it to gain attention. I’m getting sick of this assumption that men who dress in skirts and dresses are doing it just to gain attention because they are attention seekers. This is complete nonsense. Like others on this forum I, myself don’t put on a skirt or dress for attention. I do it because I find wearing a skirt or dress with leggings or tights more comfortable than wearing jeans or trousers. I also do it because I’m doing it for myself and nobody else. Also I find the feeling of a skirt amazing and it helps with my depression and anxiety and grounds me. Seeking attention from others is the last thing I’m wanting.

[Belember]

I agree with you - skirts are very comfortable and invoke mindfulness and I have negative self-awareness issues at the same time. Skirting also helps with boosting my confidence, too. I wore a midi skirt out in public for the second time yesterday. The swoosh of the fabric against my skin and the air moving around inside the skirt felt really nice where I don't feel the same thing when I wear a kilt.

I've noticed that other people mostly don't notice or care about the skirt although I have seen some interesting looks as well. I have had some nice compliments, too.

Ultimately, I want to be comfortable and confident & overcome the self-judgement that I have.

[Mouse]

I think that like it or not, a man in a skirt is always going to be attracting attention because you have bothered to wear what you want and not the normal boring fair that most of the population wear. We have found a garment which we like and feel good in and that will show up in a sea of people who just put something on to go out.

[DrFishnets]

I think that like it or not, a man in a skirt is always going to be attracting attention because you have bothered to wear what you want and not the normal boring fair that most of the population wear. We have found a garment which we like and feel good in and that will show up in a sea of people who just put something on to go out.

True but we don’t dress in skirts and dresses for to get attention like people think we do even though it will attract attention.

[Brad]

I've worn skirts for the attention it gets. This is two-fold. I like the attention, and I want others to see that a man can wear a skirt. Women wear clothes to get attention and so may we.

[DrFishnets]

I've worn skirts for the attention it gets. This is two-fold. I like the attention, and I want others to see that a man can wear a skirt. Women wear clothes to get attention and so may we.

It must be easier to wear a skirt or dress the first time if it’s done for the attention. For me it was a psychological challenge as I wasn’t doing it for the attention I was doing it for comfort and I think women’s clothes are far more interesting and exciting than men’s clothing.

[STEVIE]

It must be easier to wear a skirt or dress the first time if it’s done for the attention.

Dr F. that rather depends on the primary motivator.
In my case mine was simply to wear the same clothes as my 5ish year old female peers.
At that point there was no thought of gender or attention, except that I knew enough that it would get me the wrong kind.
As I have progressed, the attention I receive is fine, and my fashion choices have generated conversation, even friendship that would never have occurred had I been in trousers.
I don't actually care too much about reaction of any kind, just not my problem.
Steve.

[moonshadow]

Ahhh.. what's wrong with a little shameless attention seeking?

Besides, I'll let you in on a little secret, everybody "seeks attention" at least once in a while, whether they want to admit it or not...!

[Elisabetta]

Ahhh.. what's wrong with a little shameless attention seeking?

Besides, I'll let you in on a little secret, everybody "seeks attention" at least once in a while, whether they want to admit it or not...!

Not me.

[Midas]

My motivation is not attention seeking, but I accept that I will attract attention, especially in a dress, which is much more obvious than a skirt.

Like Stevie I am unconcerned by reactions of others, which are mostly positive. I get better service in shops because I get remembered, unlike the invisible masses.

[denimini]

I get better service in shops because I get remembered,

I also have experience that if I am away from my normal shopping places.

[Jim]

Most of the time I'd rather not get attention for what I'm wearing. So I don't go clothes-free in general public areas and rarely wear dresses. For that reason, most of my skirts are fairly bland, but I also like things that look good to me, so some of my skirts are brighter or have other interesting features.

[Modoc]

I'm perfectly fine with people thinking whatever they want to think about why I wear a skirt, dress, heels or anything else for that matter. What people think probably comes from years of conditioning and it's not likely that it's going to change instantaneously. I'm sure that being at a point in life where employment and partnering are not issues, helps me to be less concerned about what people think.

[Faldaguy]

I find the skirt/attention thing a mixed bag in that I often do wear skirts that will likely grab ones attention -- regardless if they are on a male or female. I don't do it for 'personal' attention but to stand out enough that people do see there is a man wearing a skirt --which is the message I wish to convey, men can wear skirts -- and should, if they wish.

When I'm asked about my skirts, which is seldom sadly, I usually say I wear them for comfort, and to get men out of their rut of regimented conformity. And it is not just sartorial conformity, but a spectrum of psychological, emotional, behavioral, even the tightly coded 'approved' attitudes and physical responses -- with anger and violence often being a man's approved range.

So yes, I often wear skirts that will grab your attention -- they will still be skirts I like and usually feel at ease in, but they may be a bit more 'edgy' to get folks thinking rather than passing just another chap in a skirt, if they even notice!

[DrFishnets]

Interesting opinions. As I’ve said when I started this thread I don’t wear skirts or dresses to seek attention, I do it for comfort and I have an arty dress sense and style. Men’s clothes are so boring and drab. I hate dressing the same as most men and I want to dress different but at the same time it can be quite scary dressing different.

I remember reading somewhere that you will received unwanted attention (usually negative) if you look nervous or ill at ease. I try to look confident and happy when I’m out but it’s hard when I’m already battling anxiety, panic disorder and depression. However, wearing skirts is helping with my confidence and a sort of grounding technique for my anxiety and depression.