2003 revisited

[STEVIE]

If I might hazard a guess, "Sara" was a mental construct that would have "allowed" you to wear the "forbidden garments" and little else. Face it, at five, none of us were terribly aware of what the future might hold, and children are very, very quick to pick up on inequalities around them. We don't get jaded until much later and our immature minds try to work out "remedies" to the problem.

You guess correctly Carl. Even now, I am not absolutely sure if "Sara" was my invisible playmate or a name that I invented for the feminine side of my nature. At 5, I was Stephen, at 15, I was using Steve or Stevie but she was still around then. Name wise, I really came to Steve proper around 50 and Sara, well she is still in my head somewhere, but in no danger of staging a coup.
For what it's worth, I also figured out quite early in life that I was not "trans", girl clothes yes, actual girl no.
That was reached by about 11 or so but it was also in the absence of any real information either.
It was really around then that it started to cause mental stress which would have consequences for me in the future which could have been avoided
had I just been able to tell and get positive support.
Anyhow, here I am today, nearly 65 and just trying to decide on a skirt outfit for the office, how lucky am I?

There's a thread nearby from 2015 asking how will things have changed in 10 years. Well we are nearly there and not much has changed.

Actually BM I will disagree, a lot has changed but not all for the good I'm afraid. From a complete lack of information we have come to an overload of it. As we already know, much of that is b******t too. The problem is that everyone "thinks" that we have an understanding of everything and that just is not true. Men in skirts, fluidity and transgenderism are aspects of a much wider problem.
However, I honestly believe that there is still a 5 year old kid out there who will be too afraid to tell anyone that he would really like to wear a dress or a skirt. Ten years, maybe maybe things haven't changed all that much in sixty.
Not conforming as an adult is one thing, as a kid it is something else.
Steve.

[Ozdelights]

However, I honestly believe that there is still a 5 year old kid out there who will be too afraid to tell anyone that he would really like to wear a dress or a skirt. Ten years, maybe maybe things haven't changed all that much in sixty.
Not conforming as an adult is one thing, as a kid it is something else.
Steve.

Common theory is 'the older we are the less we are concerned what others think of us'. As you have intimated wouldn't it be good if we were appropriately concerned from an early age.

[Barleymower]

There's a thread nearby from 2015 asking how will things have changed in 10 years. Well we are nearly there and not much has changed.

Actually BM I will disagree, a lot has changed but not all for the good I'm afraid. From a complete lack of information we have come to an overload of it. As we already know, much of that is b******t too. The problem is that everyone "thinks" that we have an understanding of everything and that just is not true. Men in skirts, fluidity and transgenderism are aspects of a much wider problem.
However, I honestly believe that there is still a 5 year old kid out there who will be too afraid to tell anyone that he would really like to wear a dress or a skirt. Ten years, maybe maybe things haven't changed all that much in sixty.
Not conforming as an adult is one thing, as a kid it is something else.
Steve.

Stevie, I wanted to be positive. I have a tendency to look at things and see the gloom. That attitude doesn't do me any good. My journey is towards a better place. I see the problems but I'm not focusing on them. "I going over there, where the weather is better and people are friendly". Like you I want to bring weary MIS along with me.

I have said before that MIS are often looked at with the same eyes as trans women. I have the deepest sympathy for the trans community and will help where I can but for myself that is not a path I want to take. I would look rubbish in a wig .

When I saw today that Brianna Ghey was murdered, probably for being trans, my heart sank. "This is going nowhere" I thought. But I cant be like that. I can't walk away now and leave Neptune and BM junior to work it out for themselves. So here I am in my very pleasant seasalt tall ships skirt having a great with my kids in half term.

[pelmut]

[...]
I have the deepest sympathy for the trans community and will help where I can but for myself that is not a path I want to take. I would look rubbish in a wig .

I'm trans and I manage to look rubbish without any help from a wig.   :-)

[Barleymower]

[...]
I have the deepest sympathy for the trans community and will help where I can but for myself that is not a path I want to take. I would look rubbish in a wig .

I'm trans and I manage to look rubbish without any help from a wig.   :-)

Hi pelmut, I think this is precisely the point. If you are Trans, that's who you are, no escaping it. I'm sure you look just fine, if you are being yourself it will show.

I have asked myself "am I trans?" the answer came back from the central cortex "you don't want it if it includes wearing a wig". So I'm not trans. I feel like I've spent my life wandering the streets knocking on doors asking if I belong there. I just get "No" answers. It's not easy not belonging anywhere.
I've come to the conclusion that I'm a CIS male who has a strong feminine other self. I don't expect people to understand, I don't understand it myself.
I'm thankful for what I have and my wife and my family. Even if I was totally trans, at this stage I think I would just have to carry it. Luckily (for me) I'm not.

[pelmut]

[...]
I have asked myself "am I trans?" the answer came back from the central cortex "you don't want it if it includes wearing a wig". So I'm not trans.

An aversion to wearing a wig doesn't mean you can't be trans.  I really hate the idea of wearing a wig and would love to have enough natural hair to be able to carry off some of the more feminine styles.  I have tried a wig and the effect was stunning; it really upset me to have a glimpse of what I should have been but never could be.  As it is, I still have just about enough hair to pass as a rather thin-haired elderly woman, especially if I arrange it well and wear a hat.  Some transwomen I know are less fortunate and are completely bald, for them a wig is essential; many of them still dislike it, but the end result justifies wearing it.  

I feel like I've spent my life wandering the streets knocking on doors asking if I belong there. I just get "No" answers. It's not easy not belonging anywhere.

Looking back, that was how I felt until I knocked on the door marked "Trans" and to my surprise found a home.  Up to that point I had been certain I wasn't trans because I had watched a colleague who transitioned and my situation was nothing like hers; it was only later I discovered there were all sorts of variations and my lack of the painful dysphoria she had suffered didn't mean I wasn't trans.  

Keep looking, I'm sure you will eventually find the door that is right for you.

[Grok]

Tomboy-refers to females that tend to have interests/hobbies/sports/activities that are usually attributed to boys.

I believe the term "Janegirl" applies to the reverse-a male who has similar interests/hobbies/activities that are usually attributed to females.

[Grok]

The “Maverick” designation could happen sooner, though, with skirts that are either unisex or designed for men. Men who wear their hair long or wear earrings were once considered mavericks or rebels. Utility kilts (my foray into the non bifurcated fashion world, at least to start) are the first step to that possibility. It’s definitely a niche market, but recognized. Skirtcraft gets props for producing America’s first (?) marketed unisex skirt that is affordable to the masses.

I would be skeptical about anything with the label of "unisex." Is it really intended that the garment be worn by males as well as females? Or is this just virtue signaling, using buzz words but actually doing nothing? For practical purposes, functionally "unisex"/"gender neutral garments" may not even be on the radar.

And those that do exist may be spread so thin as to be obscure.

[STEVIE]

Tomboy-refers to females that tend to have interests/hobbies/sports/activities that are usually attributed to boys.
I believe the term "Janegirl" applies to the reverse-a male who has similar interests/hobbies/activities that are usually attributed to females.

Correct, Grok, but one is viewed in the positive, the other mostly negative and we all know which is which.
Steve

[Grok]

Indeed, Stevie.

[Grok]

Nevertheless, I am glad we have options such as Skirtcraft and Macabi. We need all the options we can get.

One bit of hope-there seems to be some interest in MIS in Continental Europe. An area without a kilting tradition. So perhaps an novel design or two will originate there.

[Offkilter69]

The “Maverick” designation could happen sooner, though, with skirts that are either unisex or designed for men. Men who wear their hair long or wear earrings were once considered mavericks or rebels. Utility kilts (my foray into the non bifurcated fashion world, at least to start) are the first step to that possibility. It’s definitely a niche market, but recognized. Skirtcraft gets props for producing America’s first (?) marketed unisex skirt that is affordable to the masses.

I would be skeptical about anything with the label of "unisex." Is it really intended that the garment be worn by males as well as females? Or is this just virtue signaling, using buzz words but actually doing nothing? For practical purposes, functionally "unisex"/"gender neutral garments" may not even be on the radar.

And those that do exist may be spread so thin as to be obscure.

In saying unisex I mean a term that applies to garments that have characteristics of clothing worn by both sexes or are the same. Pants and t-shirts are unisex but are different in cut and style for each sex. Unisex skirts already exist by that definition: denim or cargo skirts have pockets similar to those found in pants and usually have belt loops. Clothing designers would just have to tweak the specifications (fit, pocket size and depth, belt loop size) for males. Skirtcraft has already done this. This would not be as big of a fashion leap as some would like, but it is the transitional styling most likely to have a chance of catching on.

[ScotL]

Is it really intended that the garment be worn by males as well as females? Or is this just virtue signaling, using buzz words but actually doing nothing? For practical purposes, functionally "unisex"/"gender neutral garments" may not even be on the radar.

Tongue firmly in cheek, are you suggesting marketers may pull out every stop to sell their wares? Then again, I’ve seen the “unisex” moniker attached to bland wool brown scarves. Not sure they needed the unisex label there.

But do we care? Isn’t the fact that more clothing being labeled as unisex helps us break down the genderfication (real word?) of clothing to “his” and “hers”? Along the lines of any press is good press.