skirtcafe.org

Hello all

This is a long introduction. Just think I actually made it shorter than what it was originally.

I'm really glad I found this forum. The more I read through the guidelines the more I realize that the founders and moderators of this forum could have been reading my mind when establishing this place.

First it's important that you look up the definition of my username, Apodal
I'll wait...

I'm going to trust that you looked up the definition so yeah, I was reading through the rules and guidelines and I almost fell over laughing at one of your rules. I know this rule wasn't speaking of me and my situation, but I still cracked up and had a good laugh about it:

"6. No discussion of artificial body parts or pieces of clothing meant for body parts that men do not have. That is not men's fashion"

Like I said I I understand what the rule means I just thought it was extremely funny considering my situation and how easy it would be to misunderstand that rule. No worries though, no misunderstanding here.

It's nice to see a group of people choose to wear garments for the garments sake. Not trying to be something they are not, and not trying to look like somebody they are not. Wearing the garment for comfort, or you just like the way it looks on you as a man who wants to continue looking like a man.

Since this is a skirt forum here are the types of skirts/dresses that I prefer:

Skirts:
I own 2 kilts. They are surprisingly good quality considering they are $30 eBay specials. I believe the brand is called Allsafe. When is a black utility kilt. The other is more traditional tartan kilt.

Aside from kilts I prefer the skirt to be no shorter than halfway the distance between knee and crotch. I follow a simple rule concerning the design of the skirt, could the design of that skirt I'm looking at be used as a design for a men's shirt or pants that could be sold in a mainstream men's clothing department.

I particularly like cargo skirts and denim skirts.
The best design for a skirt is the one where if you can only see the front of the skirt, from the fly zipper up to the beltline, you would think it was a pair of pants.

Dresses:
The pattern, design and length follow much the same rules as the skirts, but with quite a few other qualifiers added.
I'm very tall so a lot of my preferences are centered around that.
The best type of dress for me follows the same idea as the skirt. Could the dress pass itself off as a shirt that could be found in a men's clothing department.

Dresses cannot have, for the lack of a better term, a centerline that visually divides the dress into 2 halves, the top half top half and the bottom half. That includes things like hems in the middle of the dress, a change in design or pattern, rear pockets, and for the most part pockets in general. It looks funny when the dress is displaying obvious signs of where the waste should be, but it's being worn four to six inches above that place. Rear pockets also look funny when they're supposed to be below the waistline and they end up being in the middle of your back (I'm exaggerating, but you probably get the picture) Front pockets are a little bit more forgiving, but they're still a challenge.
Body contouring dresses don't look good on the majority of females. With males .... Well I'll just leave it at that.
If the dress is designed to highlight certain aspects of the female anatomy which mails don't possess unless they're extremely overweight, that is a dress that I will definitely pass by..
Overall with skirts and dresses I use the one second rule. Within the first second of seeing a guy in a dress or a skirt you have a reaction. The reaction goes something like this,

"That's a guy in a skirt/dress trying to be female"
Or
"That's a guy in a skirt/dress"

The goal is the latter while doing everything I can to avoid the former. Everybody will have that reaction even if they're not aware of it, and the reaction comes within the first second of seeing the man wearing the skirt/dress. Sadly most of the men you see on the internet are wearing skirts/dresses that qualify for the former. The sad part about it is those types of pictures are enough to make most men, at best, apprehensive about wearing a skirt/dress, and at worst totally reject the idea and turn into trolls against the idea.

Now that I've written a book I'll stop rambling. :>)

Welcome to the cafe.

Welcome sit back enjoy and join in the conversation

Apodal, welcome to the cafe and thank you for your introduction. You have certainly been specific in your requirements for skirts and dresses in line with your body. Of course, as you will find, we all have different shaped bodies to which your specifications may not apply. Since most men don't have breasts of the proportions of women finding a dress that fits can be difficult. Shirt dresses or T-shirt dresses, which seem to be what you are describing, are a source. As for skirts all hem lengths seem to be represented on this site. The skirt is conceptionally a simple garment but as many, including me, have found out its simplicity is definitely not so simple. Welcome to the journey, it is an enjoyable and interesting one.

Apodal wrote: ↑Sun May 01, 2022 5:55 pm Aside from kilts I prefer the skirt to be no shorter than halfway the distance between knee and crotch. I follow a simple rule concerning the design of the skirt, could the design of that skirt I'm looking at be used as a design for a men's shirt or pants that could be sold in a mainstream men's clothing department.
I particularly like cargo skirts and denim skirts.
The best design for a skirt is the one where if you can only see the front of the skirt, from the fly zipper up to the beltline, you would think it was a pair of pants.

I'm with you there, for the most part. Analogy with shorts seems a good rule of thumb for a lot of casual men's skirts, and was the basis on which I ventured out in a denim mini skirt roughly the same length as my summer shorts. (I am not a great fan of baggy, knee-length shorts: men who wear them might sometimes look better in a skirt!) Judging from images on Pinterest, shorter skirts look OK on younger people of either gender (maybe under 25 for men), but I really don't think I can get away with it now! (I bought my first kilt at 24, but I would never have dared wear anything shorter then.)

I don't really have a cargo skirt, as my tan Amerikilt and denim Union Kilt fill that slot in my wardrobe. I have two denim skirts, but they are at my current favourite skirt length, below the knee and around mid-calf.

Apodal wrote: ↑Sun May 01, 2022 5:55 pm Dresses:
The best type of dress for me follows the same idea as the skirt. Could the dress pass itself off as a shirt that could be found in a men's clothing department.

Good idea. But if I could find one, I can imagine wearing a dress which could pass itself off as a man's top other than a shirt, like a rollneck sweater, or a long-sleeved T shirt, or the top half of a pair of dungarees. Or even one cut like a man's waistcoat and worn over an actual shirt.

I think your problem with waistlines and such is perhaps mainly height-related. I am around 5'9" and could probably manage a dress with a visual divide, as long as I can keep on top of the middle-age spread! Below the waist I would no more consider a body contouring dress than a pencil skirt, but I'd happily go for a well fitted top half: but in terms of women's dresses, I have got anything in the bust department to fit it around. I may have to hope to find a sympathetic dressmaker.

Apodal wrote: ↑Sun May 01, 2022 5:55 pm Within the first second of seeing a guy in a dress or a skirt you have a reaction. The reaction goes something like this,

"That's a guy in a skirt/dress trying to be female"
Or
"That's a guy in a skirt/dress"

The goal is the latter while doing everything I can to avoid the former.

Yup!

(Sorry, my reply is almost as wordy as your original post!)

Welcome to the cafe.

I agree that dresses with defined waistlines rarely work well on men. I think it's mostly due to the longer torso, the waist invariably ends up in the wrong place. T-shirt dresses work well, as someone else already stated. Personally, I prefer irregular patterns, since they disguise the body-shape entirely. For example.

(There's discussion about the hiding of faces on this forum. I'm not going to change this picture, sorry).

MB, there's no correlation between skirt length and age. I wear short skirts and I'm 67! If you have the confidence then wear it. There are others on the site that feel the same. I think I look better in short than calf length and don't like pencil. Still each to their own.

Welcome to the fold Apodal.
I'm very glad you found us. This Cafe seems to be a fairly well kept secret. it took me years to accidentally stumble on to it.
I'm in the practicality of skirts camp.
There is nothing more simple and comfortable than a good a line cargo skirt or denim skirt.

I own one of them allsafe kilts. E bay kilts are a good entry level kilt. For giving a kilt a try. I got my first kilt in 2015. It still wears well, after several washings and no pleats care, it looks like crap, but is rather comfortable like a old broke in shoe.

I have tried a dress or two, but decided to just stick with skirts and kilts.

Well Apodal, I will let you get back to reading other threads. They are numerous. As the day is long.
Trials, triumphs, failure, victories, personal journey, tears, and a many laughs. Better get another pot of coffee going.

Welcome again, and cheers!!!!!

Interesting introduction, and I suspect we should hear some more strong opinions from you and others on the site stirred up by them! That, I think, is mostly a good thing!

Though I concur with the notion that men trying to pass as female may cause a more kneejerk reaction toward rejecting any notion the observer may have of wearing a skirt, it is neither a 'rule' nor necessarily an indictment. Fashion freedom, gender equality, and judgment based on matters of appearance other than "I like that, I don't care for that, or how blah...." are about the only things that should come of appearances.

That said, it seems you are suggesting that men must adhere to the "old rules of masculinity" -- wear dull colors (blue-jean denim skirts, et al) kilts (mostly accepted as a 'man's' garment -- on the right day/occasion) and nothing that might be frilly, colorful, or flamboyant. Here I take exception with your approach. I wear skirts mostly for comfort; but also to get men out of regimented conformity, be it clothing or a thousand other choices that somebody wants to dictate to us we must follow to be real men. My skirts are often blah A line blue denim or plain colors as they are universally easy to wear in most settings. However, I often wear wild colors, dangerously mini-skirt short or floor dragging skirts -- whatever suits my fancy at the time. I just spent winter and spring in Oregon departing for Costa Rica in a mid-calf brown suede A-line skirt that does not fail to announce it is a skirt, yet says little more. Today, my first day in the San Jose, warm and wet -- I've have on a light knee length patterned skirt in burgundy, gold, orange and black with a red slip -- it almost screams 'female skirt' if you want to employ stereotypes. Worn with a plain black short sleeved dress shirt with a horizontal hem worn out -- a very cool, colorful, and comfortable outfit -- and I don't think I sent any men running for psychological help, guns, or to congress for repressive legislation. I did get more 'looks' but I'd be hard pressed to think that I did more damage for the cause of MIS than I did good.

Glad to have another chap in 'non-conventional male attire' aboard -- I hope you, and we all keep opening eyes and minds.