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A common issue amongst kiltmen is unenthusiatic wives. Here are the main scenarios that any of us will face as well as my solution to the never ending conflict between wives and kilts:

1. You have a shy wife with body issues. Your kilts draw attention to the both of you, she doesn't want attention, you and your kilts are blamed for the resulting discomfort.

2. You have a shy wife who is a hottie. Same as number 1 except that the resulting attention actually builds up her selfesteem just enough to excite her, but too much for her to really embrace it.

3. You have an outgoing wife who is a hottie. She's pissed because you are getting more attention than she is. Suddenly you are more competition than even other hottie women, she resents this and blames you and your kilts for her funk.

4. You have an outgoing wife who is not a hottie. This is the sort of gal who will actually embrace your kilts because it draws so much positive attention, attention she doesn't often get but secretly wants. Get you a wife like this and you'll kilt with ease.

Basically unless you have a friendly, but homely, wife then you are going to spend all of your kilted days enduring her less than enthusiastic approval of your kilts. Frankly the best thing you can do is be a freakin' man and grow a pair ... if your wife is making you uncomfortable with yourself then you are pretty much living like a boy seeking the approval and affection of his mother. If you are overtly confident then she'll go with you kilted and love the fact that she's with a manly man. YOU have to be the SOURCE of her confidence. Believe it!

It is said that 'Real men wear kilts'. Gentlemen, women LOVE it when you are MASCULINE. If she don't like yer kilts, hints or overtly tells you so and you respond with anything less than a manly growled out, "So what," then your wife will respect you even less than she does now. Is this PC? HELL no! More women than men seek divorce guys in no small part than because we men have been PC'd into exactly the kind of submission that women loathe, even your wives who are testing you with their kilt crap.

Be fundamentally CONFIDENT and no matter which of the 4 varieties of wives you have they will gladly bask in your presence, particularly in public, and recognize that your kilt is just one more awesomely masculine aspect of their awesomely masculine man ... her own discomfort will be washed away by your abundant masculine confidence. All women test this in their men, they WANT you to pass the test, but most men instead try to 'please' their wives ... in the end they will secretly, even publicly, dispise you for not being man enough to stand up to them.

I'm sure someone is thinking, "Chris is so sooooo full of it." I challenge you to have your wife read this and then see how she responds. She'll either say, "You got a picture of this guy?" or, "Get off the freakin' computer and go fold my panties." Of course, if you do what she tells you to do then you have just failed yet another one of her tests and your kilting experiences will sink even deeper into the dark and vast pit reserved for all those who respond to their wives as if they were their mothers.

Be encouraged, my kilted brothers ... your women are playing a game with you, you just don't know it. The wonderful truth is that your wives dream of you winning this game, they want a man who wins. I dare say that unless your wife is anything other than a human female she will swoon over you and your kilts as you refuse to be beaten in this endless game of 'Man or Mouse'. Next time she even hints at not liking your kilt you need to puff out your chest and say, "So what."

Remember this, your feminine wife will find comfort and safety in your masculine strength. She will test your strength throughout the length of your marriage. It is not your kilt that is making her uncomfortable, it's your perceived lack of strength caused by your failure to pass her tests. There is a reason why it is said, "Real Men Wear Kilts." Your wife MUST perceive you as a real man or she will never be comfortable with you wearing a kilt, in fact she may well consider you unqualified to wear one instead. You must pass her tests or you will never enjoy her unrestrained encouragement to ...

Kilt ON!

Chris,
Then, what of skirts? Do you also think they are testing us on that issue? Hmm, it takes a "super" man to wear a skirt!

I don't know Chris....

Your view of how women are treating us is rather harsh, or maybe I'm too naive. At least it's too general and is putting all women in the same basket.

Regards!

Mipi

A kilt IS a skirt, in fact more and more any skirt on a man is being called a kilt, no matter what the design. And, yes, I stand by the reasons listed as to just why many wives frown at their husband's/boyfriend's skirt/kilt/sarong/whatever. Given the near universal experience of mugsman having to 'deal' with family, particularly wives, I made my best attempt at providing, in a humorous though meaningful way, my own experience as a mugsman ... what can I say, ladies and gentlemen, it works for me.

Mug ON!

Chris Webb

Chris Webb wrote:A kilt IS a skirt, in fact more and more any skirt on a man is being called a kilt, no matter what the design.

I can attest to this phenomenon based on personal experience a couple of years back visiting with friends in Florida. One festive night our gracious hosts invited a good number of their local friends 'round for a good party -- and it was -- and at least one (possibly more, as I was a bit fogged thanks to ale) commented on my "kilt"; it happened that my "kilt" was, in fact, a calf-length royal-blue velvet skirt. I think that there was a bit of a mental "disconnect" there, but there was no hostility whatsoever, and everybody thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

Mug ON!

Indeed!

I can't really see what the problem is. Some women don't mind and others do. My wife doesn't really bat an eyelid but I have to be wearing a skirt that isn't too flowery or bright or she can get a bit annoyed. However, she would die if I went out into the street and even in the garden I have to be aware of the neighbours just in case they see. I don't really mind if they see me or not but my wife is accutely aware and is terrified someone might see me in a skirt. I really cannot see that she will change and I have no intention of doing so, I respect my wife's views and opinions.

whitesocks wrote:I can't really see what the problem is. Some women don't mind and others do. My wife doesn't really bat an eyelid but I have to be wearing a skirt that isn't too flowery or bright or she can get a bit annoyed. However, she would die if I went out into the street and even in the garden I have to be aware of the neighbours just in case they see. I don't really mind if they see me or not but my wife is accutely aware and is terrified someone might see me in a skirt. I really cannot see that she will change and I have no intention of doing so, I respect my wife's views and opinions.

almost identical here, WS. my wife & kids are supportive of my fashion choices, however they all deal with people that would NOT be so understanding. therefore, i limit my skirting to work. no issues there, and it is where i spend MOST of my waking hours

Hi R1g0r, glad its not just me.

I object to the generalizations.

Yours in homliness, but I'm friendly

Ben Franklin said, "Eat to please thyself, but dress to please others." Ben Franklin was NOT a Mugsman. Gentlemen, if you don't dress to please yourself then you are likely doomed to spend the rest of your lives not just dressing to please others but pretending to be what others want you to be, forever being who you are not.

Go along and get along ... those that follow this axiom suffer no angst because of the discomfort of others they only suffer the internal angst of not going along and getting along with themselves. Noble, yes, but in the end everybody loses because the love shared between those who fake who they are and those who insist that they do becomes a terrible lie.

If someone can't or won't love you for who you are then you have to accept the fact that the person you love does not love you back, not really, they only love their idea of you ... unconditional love, true love, is loving someone for who they really are, not who you hope they are, act like they are, believe they are or insist they are. You can't even have a true love relationship if you are not being who you really are.

Given the sacrifices made over they years by those who have gone before us to literally force society into accepting men in skirts it just seems a shame that men are still being forced into pants by folks who 'love' them. We all have every right to wear what we want to wear, to be who we are ... these wives and family members who are denying you your right to be who and what you are simply are not loving you, they are selfishly loving themselves.

These frowning wives, girlfriends, children are not concerned about you, they are concerned about themselves, their comfort, their friends, their fear of being embarrassed. The tragedy of a man who lets this happen to himself is that he is actually robbing his wife, girlfriend, children of himself, teaching them that they can't be themselves either, choosing a comfortable lie over an only temporarily uncomfortable truth.

The uncomfortable truth is that all of our wives, girlfriends, mates, children, family members, friends, everyone finds out in short order just how acceptable and even admirable a man in a skirt is in our modern society once they actually go out with you in a skirt. The uncomfortable truth is that it is not these other people who are stopping you from 'coming out' as a skirtman, they are only providing a convenient excuse, it is your own lack of will to stop pretending and to be who you really are.

All generalizations aside, no matter what particular reason a wife frowns upon her kiltman, the general reason is her own selfishness, her own fear of her own embarrassment, her own fear of what others might think ... none of it is out of concern for or love of her mate. If it was then the same wives would be smiling and supportive, maybe even proud that they are with a man with the intestinal fortitude to defy all norms and be who he really is.

Of course I could be wrong, but you will never know unless you throw off your pants and push your skirted self past the objections of your significant others and show yourself to them and to the world for who you really are. My original wager, and a wager I have personally won, is that you'll get more real love and respect from your mate, family and friends by standing up for yourself than you will ever get by laying down for them all.

Mug ON!

Chris Webb

PS I'm not recommending anything I have not done myself. I, too, had to muster my courage, defy my family and face my own fears before I could become a full time Mugsman. But now everyone everywhere knows who and what I am and it literally seems as nothing to anyone, it's just who I am ... and, finally, those who love me are loving me for who I am, not who they want me to be. I did it, you can do it. Be encouraged.

Chris, that was a superbly arranged piece, and could have been composed by a psychologist. The only trouble being that those aforementioned psychologists are usually mired in convetionality and rarely see past their textbooks. I'm glad you used "uncomfortable" truth as "inconvenient" truth may have seen a copyright row with Al Gore

Sarongman wrote:Chris, that was a superbly arranged piece, and could have been composed by a psychologist. The only trouble being that those aforementioned psychologists are usually mired in convetionality and rarely see past their textbooks. I'm glad you used "uncomfortable" truth as "inconvenient" truth may have seen a copyright row with Al Gore

Sorry about that, reading that paragraph now the Al Gore thing jumps right out at me!

Hum, I wonder if Al Gore is secretly a skirtman, I can just see Tipper frowning at him and refusing to let him go out and about in his skirt. You know, come to think of it, if Al Gore was a skirtman then Global Warming wouldn't be such an Inconvenient Truth for him, skirts have built in air conditioning!

Mug ON!

Chris Webb

Chris Webb wrote: Hum, I wonder if Al Gore is secretly a skirtman, I can just see Tipper frowning at him and refusing to let him go out and about in his skirt. You know, come to think of it, if Al Gore was a skirtman then Global Warming wouldn't be such an Inconvenient Truth for him, skirts have built in air conditioning!

Mug ON!

Chris Webb

Taking into account Al Gore is politician (or wasat least) and well known person, the skirting (or should I say "uncomfortable truth") would be bigger problem then Inconvenient Truth for him.

Joke ON!

Hi Chris Webb, although I can seee where you are coming from I feel that life generally is a compromise whether you or I or anyone for that matter likes it or not.

Some years ago, my wife had bought a towel wrap sarong for me to wear in the house, as she thought I would be more comfortable. I have had a few more since then.
I bought a blue denim union kilt early in 2008 and initially my wife felt uneasy at the attention it attracted.
My wife has always been very keen to see me in a Scottish tartan kilt, and bought me a Scottish National tartan kilt for my 60th birthday. She has since bought me a Black Isles tartan kilt for Christmas as it is more subdued and more suitable for me to wear to the office. I usually wear trousers to work, but occasionally wear a kilt. I wear kilts most of the time that I'm not at work.