Trying on skirts in clothes shops

[Neil]

Back to the original question, "Are men allowed to try on skirts in a shop?" Of course, if they didn't it would be like holding up pounds, euros or dollars and burning them. I can't think of any merchant that owned the store ever turning away a paying customer. Have you? At least not in the last 30 years anyway.

I just had it happen to me today, actually. Very strange.

[RyeOfTheDead]

Back to the original question, "Are men allowed to try on skirts in a shop?" Of course, if they didn't it would be like holding up pounds, euros or dollars and burning them. I can't think of any merchant that owned the store ever turning away a paying customer. Have you? At least not in the last 30 years anyway.

I saw this sentiment twice in this thread, that a shopowner would never dream of turning away a customer, and that a SA who did wouldn't be long for the store if their manager found out about it. I think that is wishful thinking on our parts. Sure, I've shopped for skirts in plenty of women's stores and tried them on with no problem. But this is mostly because these places are likely indifferent to it, not likely because they've embraced male skirt wearing or such.

However, business owners do reserve the right to refuse service to anyone, and no retail company, no matter if it is a large corporation or a mom and pop boutique, is going to live or die based on one customer shopping for personal items. Sure, they're out the profit from one skirt or dress, or maybe even several if they make you into a loyal customer, but I doubt many of them see the skirtman as a potential brand promoter who will be sending lots of other guys in to try on and buy skirts. We're a fringe market at best. On the other hand, a paranoid shopkeep might fear that one offended or uncomfortable woman would be likely to tell their friends about it, who might tell their friends, and soon bad word of mouth has spread.

Which is why I have my own personal policy on this, I ask to try stuff on and if they let me I happily do it and if the item works, I buy it, and if they decline, I don't take it personal, I just don't try it on and I don't buy it. They've elected to let me know that my purchase isn't important to them, and I respond by not giving it to them.

I just had it happen to me today, actually. Very strange.

Neil, if you'd care to elaborate, I'd like to know more about what happened today. Can you paint a picture for us? Where were you, what did you want to try on and what reasons did they cite, if any, for not allowing you to try it on?

[Neil]

Which is why I have my own personal policy on this, I ask to try stuff on and if they let me I happily do it and if the item works, I buy it, and if they decline, I don't take it personal, I just don't try it on and I don't buy it. They've elected to let me know that my purchase isn't important to them, and I respond by not giving it to them.

I just had it happen to me today, actually. Very strange.

Neil, if you'd care to elaborate, I'd like to know more about what happened today. Can you paint a picture for us? Where were you, what did you want to try on and what reasons did they cite, if any, for not allowing you to try it on?

I was at New York & Company. I was obviously interested in buying for me, as I wore a short plaid skirt to the store, and specifically asked if it would be possible for me to try on a particular skirt that I liked. The salesgirl told me that men were not permitted in the dressing rooms by company policy, and offered their return policy as a substitute (i.e., buy it, try it on at home, and bring it back if it doesn't work). I followed your personal policy on this, too: I simply put it back, and will not buy from that store.

[RyeOfTheDead]

I was at New York & Company. I was obviously interested in buying for me, as I wore a short plaid skirt to the store, and specifically asked if it would be possible for me to try on a particular skirt that I liked. The salesgirl told me that men were not permitted in the dressing rooms by company policy, and offered their return policy as a substitute (i.e., buy it, try it on at home, and bring it back if it doesn't work). I followed your personal policy on this, too: I simply put it back, and will not buy from that store.

That's actually sort of interesting to hear that it is "company policy," for NY&Co because I have definitely tried on clothing in their stores before. I wonder if they changed it, or if this was the salesgirl's way of saying she didn't want you to do it.

[FloralSkirt]

I would think a SA would be more annoyed at having to deal with someone coming in before the store is opening to try stuff on than they would having to just be more aware of who is in the fitting room for five minutes during the work day.



WELL YOUR WRONG! IT WAS THE MANAGER & she comes in an hour early to get some work done. They have done this 1000's of times in the past. They did offer to let me try on in the store. The manager said they get many dudes try stuff on, but they come in after hours & go hog wild. I thought that was too weird & did not want to weird them out with this nonsense!


*** Also, at another store, I was told that they had problems with dudes going into the dressing rooms with womens clothes & beatin off all over em. SO they do not allow dudes in there. Makes sense to me.

[RyeOfTheDead]

Floralskirt, I think this thread was respectful discourse. We can disagree and that's fine. Do not, however, use caps lock to yell at me because that is entirely unneccesary. First off, my point is that this store offered to let you try on clothes during regular store hours, and you declined it. As I said, doing so to me implies guilt or an indication that you are doing something wrong. I don't care if the manager comes in early to work on stuff, you are still adding a bit of hassle to her day that was not needed.

As far as the men doing inappropriate things, that sounds like an isolated issue that is disgusting, but I refuse to allow myself to be put in ranks with guys like that. If a store wants to accuse me of that, they're welcome to not enjoy my patronage

[r.m.anderson]

RyeOfTheDead:

Without repeating it here read my post in Personal Stories.
I think something is wrong with your New York Clothing store.
Read the bottom line about calling their corporate 800 phone number
and making a point about your shopping experience.

"Kilt-On"
rm

[r.m.anderson]

RyeOfTheDead

Apology.
Sorry - perhaps you where not the shopper at the New York Co.
I got lost-misdirected in reading all the posts.

For the New York Clothing shopper:

Rereading - the shopper at the New York Co (I think it was Neil)
read my post in Personal Stories.
If you are losing the customer relations battle at your local store
then keep your cool and direct your complaint to the corporate level.
If they have any kind of customer relations policy you might find
that your next visit will be more welcome than the previous.

"Kilt-On"
rm

[RyeOfTheDead]

Apology.
Sorry - perhaps you where not the shopper at the New York Co.
I got lost-misdirected in reading all the posts.

No harm, no foul. Your point was still useful regardless of who it was directed towards.

[FloralSkirt]

Your wrong again! Its not an isolated incident. Several stores have had to call the police because of perverts "tryin on" womens clothes. It was such a problem that they stated the No dudes tryin on stuff due to perverts right in the store. That way there will be no misunderstandings.

Plus mothers shopping with daughters were turned off & complained. They did not want men crawling 'round the dressing room, who knows what the hell they are doing! One even said she would sue the store for sexual interference if she saw a men crawling around in the dressing rooms. Thats all it took was that threat (prob. not real) to get the store in question to put up a sign stating NO men in the change rooms.

On the news, the newscast all agreed that these guys names should be put on the National Sex Offender Registry.

[crfriend]

Dammit.

[Mod hat on]

This thread is increasingly leaning towards ad-hominem behaviour which is most unwelcome here at SkirtCafe. If one has factual instances and can produce solid evidence that such instances are so, then please produce it. Speculation as to why some stores prohibit men in fitting-rooms are pointless at best, and incendiary at worst. Keep it up, and the thread will get locked.

[Mod hat off]

On a personal note, mention of the "no men" sign brought to mind another that was quite common in years gone by: "Whites only". How quaint. Colour me not amused.

[FloralSkirt]

I am not saying I agree with it. But thats the reality here. This is the same place that has a humans rights bill wherein parents can drag a teacher before the human rights commission for failing to notify them that they were going to discuss either evolution or same sex issues in the classroom. Its called bill 44.

SO thats why they can put up No men signs, they passed a bill that legalized discrimination against gays.

[FloralSkirt]

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/calgary/story/ ... ll-44.html

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2009/06/ ... n-law.html

http://www.secalgarynews.com/homepage/a ... g-mistake/

[RyeOfTheDead]

Your wrong again! Its not an isolated incident. Several stores have had to call the police because of perverts "tryin on" womens clothes. It was such a problem that they stated the No dudes tryin on stuff due to perverts right in the store. That way there will be no misunderstandings.

Regardless of how many men did this, it doesn't mean that I agree to let stores treat me like I'm a sex offender when I want to try on clothes. As I said, that is within their right as a store to not let me try things on, every merchant has the right to refuse service to anyone. But I do not have any obligation to support those stores with my dollars. However, if a store manager is willing to let me try on clothing during store hours, then I frankly think it would be silly to come back during non store hours to do it.

I have never once in my life done anything that could be considered "crawling around" in a dressing room, and I refuse to be treated like I am. I am a man who wears skirts and there is nothing perverted or sexual about it, and unless I am going to be treated like any other shopper, I will take my business to stores that will do so.

However, aside from that one sign on one store on Canal Street, I have never had a problem trying on clothing in any store ever. So I think at this point I have made my position in this thread clear and I'm over it.

[Mipi]

"NO men in fitting rooms!"

That's strange. Those it means I have to try this skirt in front of everybody in the shop?