Finding Myself on the horns of a dilemma here.

[Stevie D]

Being old in America and not "up" on all the new terms, WTHDLGBTQM Please?

LGBTQ stands for Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgendered Queer.

[Milfmog]

Folks,

If you're not familiar with an acronym you can always try Acronym Finder. One of those websites it is worth keeping the URL for.

Have fun,


ian.

[Since1982]

Skip said: Thank you Stevie D...That certainly is not a very nice thing to call anyone. Smacks of discrimination and hatred. Too bad there is still so much of that in the world.

Edited:::: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered are all allowed, commonly used, non-discriminatory words in the world of today. Queer is not, Queer is a hateful, unfriendly word filled with discrimination and loathing. As a description, most of the acronym is OK. Just cut Queer off the end.

[Skirt Chaser]

GothScot, what you wear has nothing to do with her so I can understand why the conversation might have caused confusion. People are probably pretty free in telling her they don't approve of her life in some way so she is also likely wary about the motives of people who want to talk to her. Chalk it up to awkwardness from either side and let time show her you have good intentions.

At the risk of sounding more PC than sane, I'm going to call you on that attitude. It is not acceptable, in decent society, for one individual to demean another, either for dressing like a 19th century woman, or for suffering with gender dysphoria.

I know what you sound like, an ally, and you are wonderful for it. Thank you.

[skirted_in_SF]

Skip said: Thank you Stevie D...That certainly is not a very nice thing to call anyone. Smacks of discrimination and hatred. Too bad there is still so much of that in the world.

Edited:::: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered are all allowed, commonly used, non-discriminatory words in the world of today. Queer is not, Queer is a hateful, unfriendly word filled with discrimination and loathing. As a description, most of the acronym is OK. Just cut Queer off the end.

It may depend on where you live. The word queer is commonly used in the gay community here in San Francisco. I believe they appropriated the word in the last decade (or maybe even earlier) to take the pejorative sense from it.

[crfriend]

I really wish folks would stop hijacking words for their own ends. "Queer", for instance is a very useful word to describe somethat that's just a wee bit "off"; too, "gay" is another very useful word to describe a situation that is unabashedly joyous. Why these words are now considered taboo beggars the imagination save for the onset of "PC".

I've gotten in trouble at my very PC workplace for commenting on some very strange computer behaviour by the mere mention of, "Now that's a bit queer, isn't it!" There are more than a few other very useful terms that have suffered the same fate.

I wish folks would knock it off and stop hijacking the language. Why, for instance, is "liberal" a slur in the USA at the moment? Ditto "intellectual".

As far as the original poster's conundrum goes, he has precedent on his side -- he was there first and an interloper, by whatever means, tried to mess that up. Going forward, there may be some ill feeling involved, but precedence holds powerful sway. Lots of law is based on the notion. I wish him luck.

[ethelthefrog]

Queer is a hateful, unfriendly word filled with discrimination and loathing.

Depends on your perspective, really. When I was at University, in Manchester, the gay festival was called Queer Up North. The word "queer" (and "genderqueer") has been adopted, somewhat, by people who find themselves somewhere between male and female. Gender dysphoria is something of a spectrum, I am discovering (a friend is finding that they do not fit comfortably with either M or F designation), and those caught between M and F are looking for a term to cover where they find themselves. LGBTQ covers pretty-much all the range of documented deviations from "XY-male fancies XX-female and vice versa" majority. At least in the UK. Obviously, in other nations, different terms are loaded down with different types of baggage. In Skip's neck of the woods, "queer" is clearly unacceptable, and he is rightly off-put by its use here.

But anyway, we're way off topic, so I will attempt a quick summary: "dress how you please and allow her to dress as she pleases too. Her emotional response to your clothing is her business, unless you have on a t-shirt that reads 'transsexuals are sub-human' or something"

Paul.

[Since1982]

OK...think what you will. To ME, queer or fag means a nasty word to suppress or insult gay people, pretty much the same as the "N" word is used against black people. Gays can call themselves "queer" and fag can mean an English Cigarette, just as blacks can call each other "my niggah" with love and acceptance. Anyone else that uses those words in an unfriendly way is stepping over the line and should be either ignored or chastized. There are lots of words that can be used in abject ways like gay, niggah, fag, faggot, pimp or queer, I just think there are better words to use with friendliness that hurts no one in a distasteful way. I have no more to say on the subject.

[Stevie D]

Queer is a hateful, unfriendly word filled with discrimination and loathing.

Depends on your perspective, really.

Exactly.
Thanks, Paul.

The word "queer" (and "genderqueer") has been adopted, somewhat, by people who find themselves somewhere between male and female. Gender dysphoria is something of a spectrum, I am discovering (a friend is finding that they do not fit comfortably with either M or F designation), and those caught between M and F are looking for a term to cover where they find themselves.

This is exactly how I would describe myself, and I am quite happy with the term 'queer', both being applied to me, and using it myself to describe how I am.

Language develops and evolves differently in different cultures, and the meanings of words gradually change as a result. It is just one of those things which happen, even though some of us might wish it were otherwise. The challenge to us all in our global society with its modern amazing communication methods such as t' interweb thingy, is to learn to be aware of these shades of different meanings and to respect the way in which the people in those cultures use language differently from ourselves. It's not easy, but if we are part of an on-line international community (such as this forum), we need to embrace those differences, not fight against them.

[straightfairy]

Stevie,

Only just clocked you as hailing from Sheffield, clocks as 20 miles north from my door to the city centre, and my new daily commute takes me past Meadowhell. You ever pop in to 'Dumpy's' (oh, you know where....)