Can we be taken seriously?

Discussion of fashion elements and looks that are traditionally considered somewhat "femme" but are presented in a masculine context. This is NOT about transvestism or crossdressing.
Brad
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Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Brad »

I find that I do not want to wear skirts in situations where I want to be taken seriously. An instance would be getting my car serviced. The service rep (usually a male) often wants to do work you didn't ask for and there will be a bit of negotiation on the work to be done and the prices charged. Or I'm involved in a routine police stop where there is a chance the officer may let me go with just a warning and I do not want judgements made about me because I'm in a skirt. Or I'm passing a playground or school and fear that the parents / caregivers will view me as a possible threat to the children.

I feel that no matter how confidently I portray myself, I will not be taken seriously while wearing a skirt. Has anyone experienced this dilemma and how did you handle it?
jamie001
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by jamie001 »

Women fought this battle many years ago when the started wearing pants and other mens fashion. These women did not back down and they won the battle. We as skirted men need to do the same. Are we as men courageous enough to do the same?

We need to go about our daily business and not act paranoid. People seem to be able to sense paranoia for great distances. If you act paranoid, you will be treated accordingly because everyone will wonder what you are really up to. Hold your head high and go about your business, smile and treat other people with respect. Let’s win the battle that women have already won!

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Big and Bashful
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Big and Bashful »

I don't wear skirts to work, I don't fancy the possibility of ridicule and as I spend a significant amount of time in front of groups of both civilian and Naval personnel I choose to not distract or to have people complain to our department if they thought I was behaving oddly. Sometimes it is easier just not rocking the boat. When travelling and when taking cars in to have work done, I often wear a skirt, it has never made me feel as if I am being taken less seriously, the thought never even occurred to me. Maybe being significantly over 6 foot, fairly heavily built and bearded helps me get taken seriously! Thinking back, I don't think I have ever had negative comments while wearing one of my denim skirts, knee length or ankle length. I get more comments and questions when I wear my traditional kilt. I wish it still fitted!
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Fred in Skirts
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Fred in Skirts »

Do not act as though what you are wearing is anything but normal. A while ago I was stopped by the police in a random traffic stop. I had to get out of the car to get my paperwork from the side pocket on the seat. I was wearing a skirt and the cop did not even say anything, just looked at my papers and then handed them with a "Have a nice day!" The whole time I acted like there was nothing unusual about what I was wearing and he responded likewise. :D
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by maninafrock »

A few weeks ago I had to pick up a key from Southampton police station. Had to wait a while and I wasn't aware of anyone even noticing that I was wearing a dress.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Faldaguy »

Brad, I've had all of the those experiences, and absolutely no problems. I often hang out for a while at the mechanics shops; same when getting tires recently -- fully engaged in the process. I've mentioned that I'm part of 'church' group (Quakers) and we have a bi-lingual school catering mostly to locals and some international students --- I am on and off the campus frequently, engaged in activities there...nary a raised eyebrow. I've had both teachers and parents tell me "thank you" for wearing skirts -- they see it as a positive image and lesson for the kids.

As others have pointed out, I think carrying yourself with confidence is the key. Skulking around gives off negative vibes. Just proceed as you normally would, in time you will almost forget you've got the skirt and just carry on.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by STEVIE »

jamie001 wrote: Wed Jun 15, 2022 5:21 pm We need to go about our daily business and not act paranoid. People seem to be able to sense paranoia for great distances. If you act paranoid, you will be treated accordingly because everyone will wonder what you are really up to. Hold your head high and go about your business, smile and treat other people with respect. Let’s win the battle that women have already won!
Absolutely and if you suspect any disrespect from anyone you are paying to do business with, take your custom elsewhere!
Just make an absolute point that owners or managers know exactly why their company has lost a sale.
Also share and broadcast the details as far and wide as you wish!
Jamie is right, the women have earned the rights which they now enjoy and now it is our turn to prove that Men will have freedom too.
It is just a different kind of heroism that is needed is all.
Steve.
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denimini
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by denimini »

Why shouldn't we be taken seriously, unless we are dressed as a clown or are acting like one.
The only time I will not wear a miniskirt is at a funeral, although I have seen some young women wearing them.
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Sinned
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Sinned »

brad, none of those situations should be a problem for a male skirt wearer. I had a mental block about wearing a skirt to my local newsagency to pick up a siunday newspaper. Until one day I just did it and it was such a non-event and the hang up was broken. One time I was stopped by the police riding my bike through the city centre ( a pedestrian area ) and told off. I was wearing a skirt but it wasn't a factor or mentioned. If you aren't taken seriously take your business elsewhere.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by moonshadow »

You know, it's kind of funny, I've gotten to the point where I hardly think of what I'm wearing, and when I'm speaking with someone new, I'll forget I'm wearing a skirt. I make eye contact with the person I'm speaking with as I would when wearing trousers, and I can help but silently chuckle as I catch their eyes wander down to my skirt and dart back up again...

I guess women go through this when men google at their breast... sometimes I just want to say "hey man, I'm up here!". :lol:

Seriously though, speaking for myself, seldom has there been a time where people have taken me very seriously, skirts, trousers, or otherwise. I will say, I'm unstoppable in a Macabi... it is by far the easiest skirt I own for keeping my confidence level high. I do admit to be a little selfconscious with the femme stuff. But in my head, a tee-shirt and Macabi is no different than a tee-shirt and jeans.

I just dropped Jax (my Kia) off at the shop last Monday to have the hydraulics looked at on my clutch (it gets janky when the weather gets hot). I was wearing a long blue Macabi skirt. The young mechanic never batted an eye... of course it also probably helped when we started "talking cars". It became clear to him that I'm not some "blinker fluid" customer...

He did make one comment... "looks like you're heading to the beach!".

Hmm.. I like that... Perhaps I should try a Hawaiian shirt with my skirt?

Cops don't bother me. They've got bigger fish to fry these days.

As for kids, I'm with ya there... unless I know the parents, I generally avoid strange children, and generally group them with snakes.... I respect their right to live, if I see one on the road, I will swerve to avoid hitting it, but I'm fine to stay a safe distance away. :wink: But actually, I'm not a fan of kids regardless of what I'm wearing.... noisy, nasty, obnoxious, unruly, they get in the way, won't stay out of stuff... no. No kids for me. In this regard, the skirt is a tool... a shield of sorts.. Yes parents, keep your precious children away from me. I'm dangerous... grrr! GO AWAY! :twisted:
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STEVIE
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by STEVIE »

I have just thought of a real answer to the original question.
Brad, you may have hit the nail on the head too.
The answer is actually no! That is, until a majority of men stop believing it as a fundamental truth.
As Jamie said,
jamie001 wrote: Wed Jun 15, 2022 5:21 pm Women fought this battle many years ago when the started wearing pants and other mens fashion. These women did not back down and they won the battle. We as skirted men need to do the same. Are we as men courageous enough to do the same?
The bold and the underline are my additions but that is the real question.
Real courage is not the lack of fear, merely how one behaves in the face of it!
Personally, I am coming to regard skirts and dresses as badges of honour. Yeah, I know, weird!
Steve.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by jamie001 »

STEVIE wrote: Sun Jun 19, 2022 8:32 am The bold and the underline are my additions but that is the real question.
Real courage is not the lack of fear, merely how one behaves in the face of it!
Personally, I am coming to regard skirts and dresses as badges of honour. Yeah, I know, weird!
Steve.
Not weird at all. I am also getting to this reality. A man does not allow society to dictate what how the clothe their bodies. The majority of men now-a-days are sheep that simply follow the herd because they are so afraid of the repercussions of stepping out of the man-box and losing their man-card.

Reminds me of a situation that occurred 20 years ago at my place of work. A guy that I worked with had to walk over to another building that was about 1/2 block away to attend a meeting. He forgot his umbrella and was trying to borrow one. None of the guys had an umbrella to loan to him. A woman then offered him her pink umbrella. He declined saying that there is no way that he could use a pink umbrella. The final result was that he walked to the building in a torrential downpour and arrived completely soaked. This is a prime example of the man-box.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by STEVIE »

jamie001 wrote: Sun Jun 19, 2022 5:28 pm This is a prime example of the man-box.
Here is another one,
I was at a wedding some years ago and one lady guest had just got a new car as a gift from her husband.
I am no petrol head so make model and other details escape me but it was black and what I reckon would be termed a Muscle Car.
The lady takes her car very seriously indeed and a lot of the male guests were highly impressed.
Then one of them asked to view the engine. The whole of the guts had been enamelled in shocking pink by her engineer husband.
The admiration turned to disdain and it was not all good humoured either. I'm no fan of pink but the skill and patience to achieve that unseen custom job was truly impressive.
Seriously?
Steve.
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by crfriend »

STEVIE wrote: Sun Jun 19, 2022 5:58 pmI am no petrol head so make model and other details escape me but it was black and what I reckon would be termed a Muscle Car.
The lady takes her car very seriously indeed and a lot of the male guests were highly impressed.
Then one of them asked to view the engine. The whole of the guts had been enamelled in shocking pink by her engineer husband.
The admiration turned to disdain and it was not all good humoured either. I'm no fan of pink but the skill and patience to achieve that unseen custom job was truly impressive.
What on the gods' green Earth is wrong with this picture? The idiot showing disdain for the custom paint-job should have been put not-so-quietly in "his" place by her mentioning, "And it'll blow the doors of that silly one you have." My reaction would likely have been, "Nice mill -- and an even nicer paint-job!"

Seriously... What is wrong with pink? Not all that long ago it was considered a boy's colour!
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Re: Can we be taken seriously?

Post by Bodycon »

crfriend wrote: Sun Jun 19, 2022 6:25 pm Seriously... What is wrong with pink? Not all that long ago it was considered a boy's colour!
Nothing wrong with pink, or any other colour, but the wrong colour (9 out of 10 cats who expressed a preference...) in the wrong place, is a big thing in the car world. Skill and patience are no substitute for taste. I would have probably done a silent whistle and walked away. I know plenty people who would find that kind of thing automotive sacrilege and said so.
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