It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Discussion of fashion elements and looks that are traditionally considered somewhat "femme" but are presented in a masculine context. This is NOT about transvestism or crossdressing.
Andy_G
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It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Andy_G »

So I finally went out in public without any issues at all!! Went to a busy retail park, and visited some clothes shops. Then a wander round the town centre. Nobody took the blindest bit of notice! Finally felt great to be outside, in full women's clothing without any worries at all! I don't know what all the fuss was about. Take time, prep, blend in. Was a really liberating experience :D
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Fred in Skirts
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Fred in Skirts »

Andy_G wrote:
Mon Apr 26, 2021 12:18 pm
So I finally went out in public without any issues at all!! Went to a busy retail park, and visited some clothes shops. Then a wander round the town centre. Nobody took the blindest bit of notice! Finally felt great to be outside, in full women's clothing without any worries at all! I don't know what all the fuss was about. Take time, prep, blend in. Was a really liberating experience :D
And that is what everyone has been saying, nobody cares what you are wearing as long as you are wearing clothes. :roll:
I enjoy my skirts and wear them everyday, I never have any problems. I go to town shopping, the doctors and the hospital, to fine dining restaurants as well as government center.
It is just normal what ever that means... :lol: :lol:
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
Always be yourself because the people that matter don’t mind and the ones that mind don’t matter.
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JeffB1959
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by JeffB1959 »

Andy_G wrote:
Mon Apr 26, 2021 12:18 pm
So I finally went out in public without any issues at all!! Went to a busy retail park, and visited some clothes shops. Then a wander round the town centre. Nobody took the blindest bit of notice! Finally felt great to be outside, in full women's clothing without any worries at all! I don't know what all the fuss was about. Take time, prep, blend in. Was a really liberating experience :D
Excellent! I'm glad you had an enjoyable experience. We all fear some sort of highly negative response when venturing out in public, whether wearing just skirts or full women's clothing like you had done, or like I do regularly, and when said response doesn't happen, we chastise ourselves for needlessly worrying. As long as we dress tastefully for whatever environment we happen to be in, men garbed in women's clothing is no big deal. I hope you continue enjoying yourself!
I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman.
Faldaguy
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Faldaguy »

Congratulations; keep enjoying and expanding your options. No fuss at all -- except once in a while some woman will fawn over you!

Cheers,
new2skirts
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by new2skirts »

The fear is all in our heads. Some will double take, then return to their life. It's just clothes. If we furtively creep about, it draws attention. Rock that skirt, own the look!
:twisted:
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STEVIE
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by STEVIE »

Hi Andy
It actually is a really, really big deal, for you and all the other guys who take a step into the outside world wearing a skirt or dress.
Sure, us veterans can tell you how easy it actually is, that the fear is misplaced etc but until you experience it for yourself that can mean diddly squat.
By your actions, I hope that you realise that besides freeing yourself, you may just have inspired someone else to try a little fashion freedom for themselves.
Well done and just keep enjoying your new found liberation.
Steve.
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Sinned
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Sinned »

Steve is right. The decision to go out in the wide world, in itself easy to make, is an enormous step to take in reality. We don't know your family/friend situations or your locale but having taken that first trip with all the beating heart and dry mouth is huge. It's only once you are back home with a great sigh of relief with all limbs still attached that you have proved what we are saying and you join the Skirtcafe Club. I still remember my first foray and it was a nervous affair. Well done and a happy journey.
I believe in offering every assistance short of actual help but then mainly just want to be left to be myself in all my difference and uniqueness.
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by STEVIE »

Sinned wrote:
Wed Apr 28, 2021 9:48 am
I still remember my first foray and it was a nervous affair.
......and any guy who says different has probably had an amnesia attack. In my case heart attack country probably best describes where I was.
Now I get stressed at the idea of having to wear trousers.
Steve.
Andy_G
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Andy_G »

The thing is though, it actually wasn’t as big a deal as I’d expected. I’d read that if you sit in the car waiting for the right opportunity to get out, you probably never will. It’s best to park up, and get out straight away. That’s what happened. And once out, away from the car somewhere busy there’s no option but to keep going.

It all felt oddly calm if I’m honest. There wasn’t any purposeful 1:1 interactions, but there wasn’t an avoidance of eye contact either.
rode_kater
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by rode_kater »

My experience is similar: if I'm planning or thinking about it I'll never get there. But once I'm committed the stress goes away. I'm out, pants are far away so I can't change even if I wanted, just roll with it.
STEVIE
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by STEVIE »

The point that I was trying to convey is that the first experience of going out and about skirted belongs uniquely to you.
No amount of advice however well intentioned can ever really alter that, nobody really knows how you feel.
One thing, I am always glad to hear of a successful outing be it the first or umpteenth.
Every one has the potential to bring us closer to seeing complete acceptance.
Steve.
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by Spirou003 »

The idea of "going fast without thinking and too late to go back" is from the ones I use sometimes when I'm a bit worried about something. Most of the time it gives good results when you have at least a small idea of what to do after :D (that's also why it doesn't help me to meet women :( )
I'm learning english, thus when there is any mistake or weird word/sentence, feel free to tell me it!
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by crfriend »

Spirou003 wrote:
Fri Apr 30, 2021 10:03 pm
[...] (that's also why it doesn't help me to meet women :( )
Welcome to the real world of trying to find understanding companionship. It's a tough row -- even after one is fully confident.
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by moonshadow »

Andy_G wrote:
Thu Apr 29, 2021 7:54 am
I’d read that if you sit in the car waiting for the right opportunity to get out, you probably never will.
Man that brings back memories... sitting in the car, working up the courage to go outside...

We've all been there man!

Congratulations on your latest achievement!
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crfriend
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Re: It's not really a big deal after all!!!

Post by crfriend »

moonshadow wrote:
Sat May 01, 2021 2:00 am
Andy_G wrote:
Thu Apr 29, 2021 7:54 am
I’d read that if you sit in the car waiting for the right opportunity to get out, you probably never will.
Man that brings back memories... sitting in the car, working up the courage to go outside...
I was quite fortunate that by the time I was ready to show up in public in a skirt my then-wife was entirely supportive of the endeavour and cheered me on if I needed it. Had it not been for that support any first public outing might well have been delayed by months or possibly years.

Now I'm curious what could induce that much terror in me over something so entirely trivial. But I'm also over the hump.
Retrocomputing -- It's not just a job, it's an adventure!
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