My Trip to a Trans Shop

Discussion of fashion elements and looks that are traditionally considered somewhat "femme" but are presented in a masculine context. This is NOT about transvestism or crossdressing.

My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Daryl » Sat May 26, 2018 12:37 pm

Yesterday I went to a local trans shop because it advertised women's footwear in men's sizes and I was curious to see if I could find a pair of booties with heels a height I prefer. (I did not find them.) I also had half in my mind that I would buy almost anything just for the hell of it, and to give the shop owner some support. Some mary janes with heels, maybe, or even a pair of pumps for when I get confident enough to try to rock them like Mark as in Mark does.

I wore my latest circle skirt (colourfully festooned with elephants and flowers) and a slightly femme sleeveless top (though not many see that top as anything but a sleeveless shirt). I am not femme in any other ways -- no makeup, jewellery, or vocal affectations -- and I think this made the proprietor suspicious of me. Certainly she didn't go out of her way to be helpful, instead focussing on telling me I needed to know exactly what I wanted in her shop instead of just wanting to look around. Her shop is really more mail-order than anything, it turns out, not much of a showroom, but her impatience was still palpable. She really shouldn't advertise it as a store if she doesn't want people to treat it as such.

Anyway, I never even tried a shoe on, which I'd hoped to do in order to ascertain my equivalent in women's sizes if nothing else. Her shop was entirely oriented towards the costuming aspect of transness. Wigs, body parts that men don't have, and so on. Even the footwear tended to the garrish and the extreme end of femme. One could easily imagine the cast of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, getting their showtime wardrobes there.

All I got from it was her idea that my women's shoe size is probably 12 because my men's size is 11. I'm not sure that makes me confident trying to order anything online and potentially wasting a lot of money because of it being a bad assumption.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby moonshadow » Sat May 26, 2018 7:01 pm

I honestly thought this would be about a trans(mission) shop... :lol:

Seriously, I always thought they were just "cross-dresser stores". As you would imagine, there are none around here. It's difficult enough for even a New Age store to stay in business much over a year, but for something like an outright crossdresser store, especially considering I'm probably the only man that remotely fits the "bill" for hundreds of miles I don't expect one would do well in these parts.

Your story brings to mind an article posted here some time ago about how drag queens were banned in a PRIDE parade somewhere or another. It seems that on the far left, they have began to become offended with each other and now trying to ban one another... :roll: :lol: Turns out folks that are branded as being "tolerant" are really not so much so. Turns out, like the far right, they generally are tolerant only of those who share their views.

The whole thing is really quite asinine, and somewhat comical on the face of it.

Anyway, my little left/right rant aside, you don't need to visit a trans shop to buy stuff. It's overpriced and as you have no doubt seen, filled with items that aren't exactly what a typical skirt wearing MAN might be after. I have browsed some crossdresser online stores and generally wasn't impressed with what I saw... It seemed like a lot of marketing of sexual fetishes to me.

A man's size 11 would cross over roughly to a woman's size 13. Difficult to find sure, but not impossible. You will probably need to mail order off the internet for these as most brick and mortar shoe shops don't don't carry women's much past size 11 (which would be size 9 in men's) Generally to find your size in women's when it comes to shows, just take your men's size and add "2" to it.

The Shoe Show in Abingdon had a small selection of women's size 12-14 shoes, they claimed to have more in their Asheville NC location. I would say a place as progressive as Canada would have a few shoe stores that carry the larger womens sizes.

Daryl wrote:Certainly she didn't go out of her way to be helpful, instead focussing on telling me I needed to know exactly what I wanted in her shop instead of just wanting to look around.

That's NOT good business, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if she folded eventually, all the while blaming it on intolerance and bigots, when it sounds like the simple fact of the matter was she was just a b!tch.

Good luck!
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Ralph » Sun May 27, 2018 3:54 am

Something else to consider along with the "she was probably just a *****" comments above...

Remember there's an ugly hostility by the trans* communities against people who present as male. Some see us as mocking their genuine efforts to appear female; some accuse us of suppressing the gayness they just *know* must be within us; most see us as caricatures or clowns.

With that in mind, there's a good chance she just wanted you to get out of sight in a hurry because she sees our type as bad for business. What real transperson would shop here if "she" sees hairy gorillas stomping around? So she was likely doing her best to exude a "you're not welcome here" vibe without actually saying it.

I wish I were wrong, but I bet I'm not. Sigh.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby jamodu » Sun May 27, 2018 1:13 pm

When I first bought ladies’ shoes I followed general online advice/wisdom on men/women size differences, and subsequently bought a larger size. In reality they were far too big for me.

In the UK, by trial and error I went smaller. I take size 9 (standard width, G) in men’s shoes, and now size 8 in ladies’ shoes.

This is not restricted to just one brand. Hotter are terrific in standard (D) width. In Clarks, Evans, and M&S, size 8 wide (E) fit the bill perfectly.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Fred in Skirts » Sun May 27, 2018 2:49 pm

When I saw the title I read it as "TRAIN" shop. So you can see where my mind was at the time. :rofl: :rofl:
I have also looked at a few of these on line and as Moon said were just not my cup of tea. The prices were high and most of what they were selling had nothing to do with skirts.
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:whistle: Hi I am Fred and I wear skirts and dresses all of the time. :hooray:
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Rokje » Tue May 29, 2018 9:58 am

Well, I'm a transwoman and I'm sorry to hear that Daryl, that you've had a bad experience at that shop.

I order my shoes online, and what not fits, I'll send back.
Luckely in the Netherlands sizes are equal for men and women. I have a 42 (9) mens size, and I fit a 42 woman size too. I only have problems with the width, because my feet are quite wide.
Be proud to wear a skirt or dress they are just clothes. Yes , they are for men too :mrgreen:
I'm Marica, a 54 year old girl.

Walking on high heels every day 8)
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby pelmut » Tue May 29, 2018 10:39 pm

Ralph wrote:Remember there's an ugly hostility by the trans* communities against people who present as male.

Where on earth has that idea come from?  There are a few noisy trans 'activists', just as there are noisy activists in any field, but they don't represent the majority of trans people. Trans people are just as diverse as the rest of the population and, in my experience, exist as individuals who just want to quietly get on with their lives and don't form communities with hostility against anyone.

Some see us as mocking their genuine efforts to appear female; some accuse us of suppressing the gayness they just *know* must be within us; most see us as caricatures or clowns.

You must know some trans people who are quite unlike the ones I know. Those attitudes sound as though they are based on a travesty of 1950s pseudo-psychiatry.

I wish I were wrong, but I bet I'm not. Sigh.

You will be pleased to know that I think you are wrong.
There is no such thing as a normal person, only someone you don't know very well yet.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Caultron » Fri Jun 01, 2018 3:12 am

Daryl wrote:.Anyway, I never even tried a shoe on, which I'd hoped to do in order to ascertain my equivalent in women's sizes if nothing else. Her shop was entirely oriented towards the costuming aspect of transness. Wigs, body parts that men don't have, and so on. Even the footwear tended to the garrish and the extreme end of femme. One could easily imagine the cast of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, getting their showtime wardrobes there...

I've never been to a trans shop, but I'd certainly stay away from that one (for however long as they stay in business).
Courage, conviction, nerve, verve, dash, panache, guts, nuts, balls, gall, élan, stones, whatever. Get some and get skirted.

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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Ralph » Sat Jun 02, 2018 5:14 am

pelmut wrote:[You must know some trans people who are quite unlike the ones I know. Those attitudes sound as though they are based on a travesty of 1950s pseudo-psychiatry.
You will be pleased to know that I think you are wrong.

In retrospect, I realize that I was applying a rather limited set of conversations (all online; if there's a trans community here in the rural Colorado prairies it's escaped my notice) to an overly broad (no pun intended) generalization. I also wrote that after an unpleasant encounter in a virtual world, where I have designed my character to look very much like my "real life" appearance -- full beard, beer gut, and overtly feminine dresses. I guess the lesson here is not to lash out in a public rant when I'm in a bad mood.

So... I'm happy to hear that the conversations I've had were not representative of the majority.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby pelmut » Sat Jun 02, 2018 10:09 am

It is unfortunate that some sections of the media revel in stirring up controversy by creating the impression that 'all these people are like this'.  The same tactics were used against coloured people - then against homosexuals - and now against transgenders. To a much smaller extent they are also used against men in skirts from time to time.  Also, a few noisy hotheads can give a bad impression which tars the others with the same brush and makes ordinary people wary if they have had a bad encounter - it sounds as though that might be what you have experienced. 

Returning to the original topic: I am trans, but personally would not go into 'trans shops' because I associate them with fetish and under-the counter rip-off; charging high prices for everyday items. Those are my prejudices - I may be wrong.
There is no such thing as a normal person, only someone you don't know very well yet.
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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby Caultron » Sun Jun 03, 2018 3:53 pm

pelmut wrote:...I am trans, but personally would not go into 'trans shops' because I associate them with fetish and under-the counter rip-off; charging high prices for everyday items. Those are my prejudices - I may be wrong.

No, I suspect that in many cases you are right.

It seems to me that the best things to get from a trans shop are information and advice. But unless they're charging by the hour for consultaion they don't make money from information and advice, so I guess they have to rely on specialty pricing.

But again, I have no personal experience.
Courage, conviction, nerve, verve, dash, panache, guts, nuts, balls, gall, élan, stones, whatever. Get some and get skirted.

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Re: My Trip to a Trans Shop

Postby STEVIE » Sat Jun 09, 2018 6:21 pm

Hi all,
So called community and it's collective mind set is our worst enemy.
I only know a limited number of transgender people but they have been as supportive as I could wish.
Society will follow where individuals lead, eventually.
Steve.
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