Freestyle Fashion and Religion

[jamie001]

I am wondering how members here deal with religion and freestyle fashion. I would much appreciate if members could answer the following questions:

1. Do you wear freestyle fashions to Church or when interacting with Church Members at other functions?

2. If you don't wear freestyle fashion to Church, how do you deal with the situation when you encounter a member of your church when you are out and about doing normal activities like shopping and are wearing freestyle fashion?

3. Are there any folks there that are members of more strict religions such as Baptist or Catholic? How do you deal with the potential issues, if any.

Thanks,

Jamie
Fashion Freedom for Men

[Jim]

I'm a believing, practicing Mennonite. Several years ago, I started wearing skirts to church functions (but not Sunday worship) when I had a skin irritation in my groin area. People accepted my explanation that it was because of a skin irritation. But skirts were more comfortable even without a skin problem. Now, I am occasionally seen in skirts by other members. Some have let me know they don't like it, others don't mind. I don't wear skirts to church functions to avoid distracting those who have problems with it, and to avoid potential conflicts. Because of the side effect of my medication of heat intolerance, and my short build, shorter shorts and shirts with genuine short sleeves work better for me. These are usually found in women's sections of the stores, but is what I wear much of the time. I avoid the more feminine styling. I've heard no objections.

[Big and Bashful]

Have you read through this thread?

http://www.skirtcafe.org/forums/viewtop ... 41&t=17043

I don't do religion, not a believer, but each to their own. The above thread has a lot of serious debate on the matter, I found it quite interesting.

[RichardA]

Catholic and wear a kilt, I'm not too sure how a skirt would go down at my local church, I did wear a camouflage kilt once and no one said anything so maybe a skirt would get the same reaction, but I'm not willing to give it a go, but would not mind giving another catholic church a go out of my area.

[MrNaturalAZ]

Your question(s) assume everyone goes to church. If this was an actual poll, it would need a choice for "not applicable" - which is my choice.

That said, I've never understood why people are so concerned about what they wear to church -- usually their "Sunday best", no? If the purpose is to celebrate your faith and worship your gods, what should it matter what you wear? I'd think it would be a rather shallow deity that would look down upon its disciple for his clothing choice.

[jamie001]

Catholic and wear a kilt, I'm not too sure how a skirt would go down at my local church, I did wear a camouflage kilt once and no one said anything so maybe a skirt would get the same reaction, but I'm not willing to give it a go, but would not mind giving another catholic church a go out of my area.

Richard,

Thanks for the response. I understand about not wearing a skirt to church as to not be a potential disruption. On the other hand, how do you deal with running into other parishioners/church members when you are out and about in town and are wearing a skirt that cannot be mistaken for a kilt? Is this an issue?

[dillon]

Though I seldom attend services, since my beliefs have deviated from conventional Christianity over the past few years, I would probably not do so skirted. Mainly because church doesn't seem to me the place to make a statement of my fashion choices. I would be there for other reasons, not to be a distraction. There are lots of other venues where I can express myself, and enjoy doing so much more. But I can understand someone wanting to find acceptance in church, especially if it is your main community of support and friendship.

[Kirbstone]

I agree with your sentiments entirely, D., but for purely selfish reasons I do attend regularly as I enjoy the choral singing and I thump organ quite often, e.g. on Sunday 28th I am required to once again annoy the punters with my versions of popular hymns and blast 'em out the door at the end with something lively!

Tom

[jamie001]

I would like to thank everyone so far for the responses, but one of my questions (the most important question) still remains unanswered. My question is:

Assume that you belong to a Christian Church and that you do not wear skirts to church. How do you deal with chance meetings of members of the congregation during normal activities such as shopping or eating in a restaurant while you are wearing a skirt?

Does this cause problems?

[Caultron]

I would like to thank everyone so far for the responses, but one of my questions (the most important question) still remains unanswered. My question is:

Assume that you belong to a Christian Church and that you do not wear skirts to church. How do you deal with chance meetings of members of the congregation during normal activities such as shopping or eating in a restaurant while you are wearing a skirt?

I say, "Hi, how's it going?"

I Does this cause problems?

No.

[Sinned]

jm001,

This has happened to me and I don't draw attention to my skirt unless they mention it. I carry on as normal a conversation as if I were conventionally garbed. I may just explain that I find the skirt comfortable and have no other agenda than that. MOH often challenged me to tell my mother and I did with positive support from her and now she challenges me to wear a skirt to Church as if that is the ultimate threat! I wouldn't wear a skirt to Church for much the same reasons that you have mentioned - I feel that it would distract others' attention from the main purpose of attendance - worship. Some at Church know that I wear a skirt but most don't. Maybe if they all knew then I might be tempted as there would no longer be any "shock" effect.

[RichardA]

Catholic and wear a kilt, I'm not too sure how a skirt would go down at my local church, I did wear a camouflage kilt once and no one said anything so maybe a skirt would get the same reaction, but I'm not willing to give it a go, but would not mind giving another catholic church a go out of my area.

Richard,

Thanks for the response. I understand about not wearing a skirt to church as to not be a potential disruption. On the other hand, how do you deal with running into other parishioners/church members when you are out and about in town and are wearing a skirt that cannot be mistaken for a kilt? Is this an issue?

I suppose I've been lucky up to now, but normally when I go out it's by bike so dresses in Lycra shorts and top so most people see me in a Kilt or cycle wear.
But getting back to the question skirts in church, I don't think anything would be said on your first visit, but if you carried on going every Sunday I'm sure someone would approach you sooner than later, but saying that today we live in a society were sometimes it is better to say nothing to avoid a confrontation, people have been killed for less. When I go walking/hiking people just either smile or look at the ground as to say “I'm not looking at you” as the same we don't like to stare at people with disability’s, we notice them but say nothing.
I don't think anyone would be ordered out of a church or refused Holy Communion for that matter not unless you were making a rumpus or wearing a very short mini skirt and showing off, I would like to try it for an experiment just to see the reaction on people's faces, but then I think it would be wrong of me to use my religion as a test for acceptance for wearing a skirt.

[dillon]

I think the main problem would be between you and the person you bumped into, assuming they were offended, and not between you and the Church, unless it is some very conservative denomination who ostracizes those they see as sinful. It is always possible that shortly upon meeting one person from the congregation, while skirted, everyone else in the church will soon know of your interests; that depends on the attitude of the one you bump into, but if you are going public, it can't really be helped.

[Sinned]

I suppose that being an LDS means that we are encouraged to show a great deal of tolerance in that we consider Church being a "hospital for sinners" ( we are non of us perfect, only some better than others ) and are glad to see people attending. We are taught that it is more important to attend than what we are wearing when we do. Church leaders have included personal stories in the talks they give about such tolerance. I have known some of the members for donkey's years so I know that they would accept me if I were a bit more outgoing. Why haven't I - well I haven't been the most constant attender the past few years and I have generated a distance between me and the rest of the membership and I need to get over that. I'm not going to broadcast it but if anybody asks then I will be truthful. So will I wear a skirt at Church then probably?

Eventually.

Sometime in the future.

After a great deal of prayer and preparation.

Yes, perhaps, but I don't know how this would go down with MOH given her antagonism to my skirt wearing generally. I don't want to go there and MOH to use it as an excuse not to attend Church, which she might.

If I were brutally honest I think that her opposition is the really BIG, BIG, obstacle to my skirt wearing. I just don't know what I can do or say to ease the situation. The irresistible force meeting the immovable object.

[Ralph]

Well, here's my point of view.
Background: Conservative evangelical (no, really!) currently attending a rural, VERY conservative southern baptist church

It's a bit more complicated for me in that I go far beyond skirts and stop just short of call-me-sally crossdressing. I do not consider myself female in any way; I do not alter my appearance to look more like a woman; I skip the wigs and makeup and falsies and bras and girly name ("not that there's anything wrong with that", of course -- it's just not me). I am all man inside and out, but for whatever reason I have been drawn to wearing dresses as far back as I can remember. I'm not truly comfortable unless I'm clothed neck to ankle in soft fabrics and full skirts. I gave up trying to understand why decades ago.

I've also grown up in the evangelical church -- usually baptist just because those are closest (geographically) to me, but I'm not big on labels and granfaloons (bonus points if you grok that term). So when I got to Deuteronomy 22:5, I was stopped in my tracks. I spent a couple of years in serious angst, wanting to do right by God but also unable to resist the seductive pull of the dresses.

Here's where I eventually ended up: I gave it back to God. I would be only too glad to stop, if I could just be rid of the irresistable urge. What followed was an incredible peace of mind. I found myself turning more and more to passages that tell me I'm not condemned for failing to wear pants or for eating shellfish or for not taking my disobedient children outside the city gates and stoning them to death. My obligations are to love God, and love my neighbor. All you need is love. If I can manage that, the rest takes care of itself (e.g., I won't commit adultery if I have respect for my own wife or the husband of the woman I am tempted to have an affair with; I won't steal or kill or gossip about someone if I truly love my neighbor, etc.) So my own guilty feelings were washed away. Oh, I still get memos from God once in a while spanking me for NOT living up to the love side of the deal... but what I wear isn't a problem.

That brings us to the other part: Do I dress how I want in church? Absolutely not, nor in fact would I be comfortable dressing like that in public at all (small town, everybody knows one another... if I showed up at Walmart in my favorite velvet turtleneck maxi dress, I'd be front page news the next morning).

NOT, however, because I think it's wrong, but because I am not going to be a stumbling block to my brothers. Paul warned against eating and drinking foods that were considered sinful in front of people who had not come to grips with their freedom from Mosaic law. As much as I love my brothers, I know they are extremely wary of all things which even appear to be sexual deviance, whether they are or not. These folks equate crossdressing with homosexuality, which as far as they are concerned is no different from bestiality and incest. I know they are wrong, but I don't have it in me to fight that culture. I *might* be able to convince one or two of them, the ones who refuse to pick up the nearest rock and start throwing it at gay folk, that I'm not the spawn of Satan (or in my case, the spawn of satin). But the best I would manage is to split the church, violently, over an issue that I am not willing to fight for myself, much less make my brothers fight each other over.

So for the sake of peace, I wear jeans and t-shirts, or even a nice button-down dress shirt, to church. I may have a satin camisole or tights hiding underneath, but that's the farthest I'm prepared to go.

The other reason I don't go out in public is I'm aware of how weird I look, even by my own loose standards. A potbellied, bearded guy with hairy legs and broad shoulders just can't look good in a floral sundress... so out of compassion for the rest of the world, I spare them that sight. My poor longsuffering wife, however, gets treated to the whole show