Commonplace

[jamodu]

There was once a time when my wife would be enraged at the mere mention of wearing tights - let alone wearing a skirt (!).

Now, especially recently, I've started buying and wearing my own skirts and tights at home - and it's a non-issue.

I mix men's and women's items together (I'm currently wearing a dark red rugby shirt with knee length black skirt, black support tights, and ballet pumps), and go about my daily routine.

We interact as usual, and there's no negative comment or snide looks from her.

It's become commonplace.

Happy days!

[skirtyscot]

That's great, jamodu. How did it happen?

[jamodu]

It wasn't easy, and it has taken many years of 'persuasion' in respect of my protests at the double-standard in women being able to wear traditionally male clothing while the opposite isn't accepted. Early in our 30+ year relationship, she would never, ever, consider wearing trousers. Now, she always wears them at home (but not to work).

Due to an ongoing neurological problem, my legs often suffer from being cold (even during the summer months) or from being tired, or from neuropathy (pins-and-needless sensations). Despite her disapproval on my wearing (her) tights, one day I simply bought some opaque tights in my size - and told her the reason why: because my legs were cold. She didn't argue. It was preferable to taking medication. The 'collection' started from there. Support tights and stockings are especially useful on those days when I am experiencing symptoms.

Even so, on some days, wearing tights with trousers didn't seem practical, so I tried on one of her skirts and really liked the sensation. The combination is so comfortable. One day, I told her plainly that I wanted to wear a skirt - and that I had tried on one of her old jersey/elasticated skirts. After asking me which one, I put it on and showed her (not believing that it would fit me). She wasn't exactly overjoyed, but I explained how it wasn't going to be a threat to our relationship - and again expressed society's clothing double-standards.

A short time passed, and I bought some women's shoes (flats) to wear around the house, and then some skirts in my size, and then a couple of dresses out of curiosity, during sale periods.

I don't dress in female attire all the time - but just when the mood arises, typically mixing male and female clothing. However, sometimes I purposely wear them often enough to demonstrate that it isn't an issue. Recently, when I was suitably attired, she joked that she was the one now wearing the trousers while I was wearing the skirts.

[Ralph]

jamodu, when a man expresses interest in wearing clothes traditionally (at least, in our current culture) associated with women, there are two major fears that enters a woman's mind:
1) He must be gay
2) He wants to be a woman

Both of those, obviously, threaten a stable marriage and throw everything she has believed about the man she fell in love with. So when we reveal this side of us, it's VERY imporant to stress that neither of these is true (assuming, of course, they aren't).

For us, it's much easier in that we do not attempt to look like women. You make a more convincing case for "I don't think I'm a woman or want to be one" when you're not wearing a padded bra, a wig, and a gaff to hide Mr. Happy.

Men who are focused more intently on the pleasures of clothes also tend (with a large variety among the population, so your mileage may vary) to do so at the expense of other people and needs outside of their own... so it's equally important to make sure she doesn't feel neglected or feel like it's always all about you.

And if she has boundaries beyond which she absolutely can't tolerate life, don't go there. For my wife, it's "not in front of the children". So even though they are in their 20s and know perfectly well what's in my closet (literally and figuratively), I always wear trousers when they come to visit.

Glad to hear things are progressing smoothly!

[jamodu]

Good grief (!) I received a compliment from my wife.

I was wearing a black polo-neck dress with matching cardigan, black tights, and black court shoes. She said that I looked good and smart in my outfit. She much preferred it to my 'patterned/floral' dress. She suggested that I should buy more 'plain' (one colour) dresses in future.

Yesterday, she complimented me on the blouse that I was wearing.

It gets worse (better). She's even browsed the web looking for suitable shoes and underwear that I should buy - and, when shopping, has looked-out for such items for me.

In one recent minor argument, she complained about my ability to buy clothes that she couldn't get in her size.

I think someone has kidnapped my real wife and swapped the original with a near-duplicate.

[skirtyscot]

It's the invasion of the body snatchers! When are they coming to my house?

[Caultron]

Good grief (!) I received a compliment from my wife...

Enjoy and be thankful!

[partlyscot]

I think someone has kidnapped my real wife and swapped the original with a near-duplicate.

She is not a near duplicate, other than her attitudes, the replacement we supplied was an exact, duplicate. You were not supposed to notice, and certainly should have not spoken publicly about the replacement. This is one of the conditions of our service, did you not read the conditions?

OK, joke over, Stop talking about it Jamodu, you'll jinx it!

And congratulations, it's a problem many on here would love to have, I know I do when the GF threatens to steal one of my favourite skirts.

[Sinned]

A la "The Stepford Wives".

[Reaper_Man]

my wife was initially sceptical about skirts and dresses but eventually accepted the skirts but was still not sure about dresses, eventually though after i persuaded her to give it a try and have a night out with me wearing a dress and seeing that it was actually a non issue she is now quite happy for me to wear both but she does like to come shopping with me when i'm intending to buy new skirts or dresses as she says she won't let me buy anything that she feels makes me look like a "tw*t" (her words) and flowery dresses are definitely a no go zone

[Sinned]

It seems to me that anything that is flowery seems to be classed as solely for female to the extent that any sort of pattern needs to be suspect for the male. Yet I remember in the 1960s we boys/men wore flowered shirts/ties and trousers as the in-thing. When I look at my stock of skirts with only one exception they are mainly single colour garments. The one exception that bothers me is black with white and pink dots and dark pink and light pink bows on it. I don't know if I would ever wear it out of the house. If the pink had been blue then maybe I would but pink - don't know. Do any of you wear dresses/skirts with flowers/patterns on them?

[crfriend]

Do any of you wear dresses/skirts with flowers/patterns on them?

I have a number of skirts with flowers and patterns, two of which got mileage at work this week. One is my "Ellery" maxi which is reminiscent of a floral mixed with a paisley and executed in three shades of purple. Another is my "peacock" skirt which is a summer-weight one that's black with peacock feathers painted on it. The third one that comes to mind is a very old one of Sapphire's that's now in very rough shape (the cats got to it) which is an all-out floral pattern but in subdued colours.

Hawaiian shirt season is coming, and I have a few of those that are pretty darned loud and which have flowers all over them.

So, the myth that only the gals can wear floral patterns is just that -- a myth. Go thee hence and bust a few more [myths].

[Ralph]

Do any of you wear dresses/skirts with flowers/patterns on them?

A couple, but since I only wear them inside my own house the only one who has to endure my fashion blunders is my wife.

[crfriend]

, but since I only wear them inside my own house the only one who has to endure my fashion blunders is my wife.

The trick here is to contemplate the "blunder", tease out why it causes a failure, and work it out so instead of a blunder you have a victory. I posit that it's possible in many, if not most, cases to prevail over the problem.

You won't win every time; there are some hills that cannot be climbed. Sapphire has an exquisite skirt-suit that looks entirely smashing on her -- a pale sherbet-green based one. I know there's no way in creation I could work that one and still look believable. So I do not try. Let wisdom be your guide.

[Kilted_John]

Do any of you wear dresses/skirts with flowers/patterns on them?

You were saying? This one is the skirt that I feel most confident in, which is odd. I've worn it publicly quite a few times.

-J