I'm not as adventurous as I used to be

[Brad]

I find that as I'm getting older, now 56, I'm not as anxious to wear skirts in public as I used to be. I still have the desire but I don't act on it. I used to take more chances and push the limits. Now I worry too much about being seen by people I work with, or being judged and having to explain. Also there are a number of children living in my apartment building and I don't want their parents thinking I may be a dangerous pervert. I never used to worry about this stuff before.

Has anyone else experiened this, and how do you handle it?

[Caultron]

Convince yourself that wearing skirts is a valid (albeit unconventional) choice of clothing, and not a perversion you need to hide.

[Sarongman]

Strangely, as I gain in years, I feel more able to throw off shackles of conformity than when I was younger. The only times I might go to trousers these days is if I feel down and, therefore wish to blend in and be anonymous, when the need to go out raises it's ugly head.

[Caultron]

Strangely, as I gain in years, I feel more able to throw off shackles of conformity than when I was younger. The only times I might go to trousers these days is if I feel down and, therefore wish to blend in and be anonymous, when the need to go out raises it's ugly head.

Is going out a problem, then, or only when skirted, or only when you're feeling down, or only when down and skirted?

[Sarongman]

Caultron, I've been fine now for a good year and a half but. for a previous 12 to 18 months, I was seriously depressed for no reason that could be pinned down. It was during my "black dog" episode that I was reclusive and wearing trousers to blend in, though comments by people who knew me, such as "No skirt then? showed that I was not really too inconspicuous. This is all behind me now, thank God, and having had a bout of depression, I can now easily empathise with present sufferers.

[Sinned]

I, also have been through a period of depression and so know the difference between that and just feeling down. Depression pervades ones whole soul and reduces ones confidence to zero. During that period we remodelled our bathroom and I had to measure a piece of high amp cable to run from an outside switch, up the wall and through it to the shower. It took me over half an hour to cut that piece of cable because I had convinced myself that I hadn't measured it right and had to keep re-measuring it. That's how bad I was; now it would take me just a couple of minutes. This bout of depression was caused by overwork in a stressed out environment in which I had developed a high level of adrenaline that had nowhere to go once the stress was relieved. So I can empathise. I'm 59 and am the opposite, am growing more confident in my skirts although I am having to get that drilled deeply through the years of alternative conditioning. Brd, don't worry so much. If you've been seen around in your skirts then it isn't so much of a mystery is it?

[Caultron]

Caultron, I've been fine now for a good year and a half but. for a previous 12 to 18 months, I was seriously depressed for no reason that could be pinned down. It was during my "black dog" episode that I was reclusive and wearing trousers to blend in, though comments by people who knew me, such as "No skirt then? showed that I was not really too inconspicuous. This is all behind me now, thank God, and having had a bout of depression, I can now easily empathise with present sufferers.

Thanks for sharing that; now I understand your post.

Clinical depression is indeed a much different problem than having a down day. I'm glad you're over it.

[STEVIE]

Hi Brad,
I think that I may be about to commit cafe sacrilege but wearing a skirt is not the "be all and end all".
The real point, as I see it, is the choice, trousers or skirt.
A guy wearing a skirt when kids are present has nothing to do with perversion and all to do with the perceptions of their parents, your neighbours.
Wisely, you consider that, not unadventurous, just not stupid. You are the one who has to co-exist with these people in "real life".
There's no need to beat yourself up because you are mindful of others' feelings, that's called empathy.
That said, as long as you want to wear a skirt, find some middle ground where you can choose and not in isolation if you can.
Now, you mentioned work, I can't suggest working skirted but would your colleagues be a possible "outlet"?
Do you have a particularly favourite haunt, a bar or cafe perhaps, where you are well known and relaxed? Try going there skirted, go home trousered, a compromise sure, but mission accomplished, no?
In case you wonder, I've done all of this and still do simply to preserve a "status quo" at home, not ideal but it's the best I can do for now.
I reckon that's my choice.
Steve.

[Sinned]

Stv,

I agree with you on this and set the cat among the pigeons, so to speak. As I have said from the outset that I don't want to wear a skirt ALL the time = just to be able to choose one as part of my attire WHEN I WANT TO. Trousers are not so comfortable now but they have their uses - I wouldn't dream of working on the roof or gutters in a skirt, for instance, although it would be possible. There are formal circumstances where a skirt would not be appropriate also. So in that respect I find difficulty with those of you who reject trousers entirely although I wouldn't judge or condemn your desire to do so. I just want the freedom to be able to choose whatever I want to wear without those around me being so judgemental. I have to balance my desires to do what some ( including MOH ) regard as strange at best or perverted at worst and the feelings of those around me, with whom I have to share the remainder of my life here on earth. It's not easy getting that balance right and my next step Is convincing MOH that wearing a skirt outside the house is not the worst thing in the world. I am hoping that I can persuade them on holiday to let me try my skirts on a captive audience who we will never see again to prove that wearing a skirt will not get me ostracised from the whole of society. But if it really comes down to my wife or my skirts then my wife would win every time but it would not be an easy victory for her.

To get back to the theme I have always been adventurous and dared to be nonconformist which has always set me apart from the crowd. I have not changed in that and probably never will.

Dennis

[STEVIE]

I'd also like to add a bit more to my previous post.
There is another key issue, and that is being comfortable with yourself and your environment. Wear a skirt where you are happy to be seen, there is no need to torture yourself over it. It's then quite likely that, in time, you will choose to expand the comfort zones again.
Take your own time and mainly be happy.
Sinned, I sincerely wish you well in your quest to convince your good lady. For my own sanity, I had to abandon that and accept it's me in a skirt or us in trousers, ne'er the twain shall meet.
Steve.

[Brad]

Thanks for all of your comments. I have to remember that skirt-wearing does not define me. I can wear skirts when I want and not wear them if the occasion doesn't lend itself, or if I would feel uncomfortable. I don't have to be "the guy who wears skirts". I'm a guy who likes to wear skirts when I feel like it.

[crfriend]

I have to remember that skirt-wearing does not define me. I can wear skirts when I want and not wear them if the occasion doesn't lend itself, or if I would feel uncomfortable. I don't have to be "the guy who wears skirts". I'm a guy who likes to wear skirts when I feel like it.

This, "for the win"!

Seriously, I've not seen the idea summed up so concisely before. That was very well put, Brad.

The fact that we wear skirts does not define us -- it's only one small facet of who we are, and we are all very complex creatures.

[STEVIE]

Hi Brad,
Yes, very well put.
Good luck and keep choosing.
Steve.

[skirtyscot]

Wear a skirt once, and everyone will remember you as "the guy who wears skirts", even if you normally wear trousers!

[crfriend]

Wear a skirt once, and everyone will remember you as "the guy who wears skirts", even if you normally wear trousers!

Bugger. I'm ruddy doomed...