skirtcafe.org

Hi all.

One of the few things I recall from my childhood was how I liked to put on a skirt in preschool. I think I did it during play time (I can't remember the details). I don't seem to remember any negative reactions to it, but it's entirely possible I've just forgotten them.

I had actually forgotten all about that until I read a novel about a male-to-female transgender teenager recently. Ever since then I've been wondering what it would feel like to wear a skirt. One day, I decided to experiment using an old shirt, the waste band from an old pair of briefs, and some paper clips. Not something I would ever wear in public (it's just plain tacky), but it was enough to partially satisfy my curiosity, and I liked it.

I'm legally blind which is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because if I wore a skirt in public I wouldn't be able to see any of the funny looks I might get. A curse because I need sighted assistance to go clothes shopping in a physical store. I'm self-conscious enough shopping for clothes considered "normal" for men without adding the embarrassment I feel at my desire to wear a skirt. My self-consciousness comes from both being naturally shy and being a big man. I'm not certain it would even be advisable for a person my size to wear a skirt.

I'm not really someone who cares much about fashion except that lately I've been wanting to be a bit more adventurous with what I wear. I don't know where the best place would be to shop online in Australia (I'd rather have my skirt purchases sent to an Australia Post parcel locker) or what I should look for in a skirt in order to at least look as good as I can with my excess weight.

I've noticed from looking at other posts in this forum that I'm not the only aussie man interested in wearing skirts, and nor am I the only one in Brisbane. It's great that a place like this exists.

G'day, webboy42, and welcome to the group.

The best (and probably only) way to wear a skirt in public is to sum up your courage, fake a little more, and then just do it. I can promise that the only person who very much cares will be you. A surprising number of people won't even notice, and the most common reaction from those that do is, "Oh well."

People dress in all sorts of unusual clothes for all sorts of reasons, so you'll just fit into that same niche.

A lot of us here have started out buying skirts in thrift stores because they're so cheap you can do a lot of experimenting. They're also great for finding your size. Bring a tape measure, look for a width that matches your waist size, and then go from there.

If you need sighted assistance in physical stores, I presume you have someone who usually does that for you. So just matter-of-factly tell them you want to try wearing a skirt and ask them to help. If it helps, go when the store isn't likely to be busy.

I buy a lot of skirts on Amazon and others here buy from eBay. But any on-line site that sells clothing will do.

As to your dimension, I'd recommend something roomy and at least knee-length. Utility kilts are worth considering.

So thanks for joining the group and I hope we can help you on your journey. Please keep us up-to-date and feel free to ask as many questions as you like.

Welcome to shirt Cafe. Do not worry about your size I am of the very large plus size myself and I wear skirts all of the time in fact I have not worn pants or shorts in over three years. I love the comfort and ease of getting dressed that skirts give you.

Once again Welcome.

Caultron wrote:G'day, webboy42, and welcome to the group.

Thanks.

Caultron wrote:The best (and probably only) way to wear a skirt in public is to sum up your courage, fake a little more, and then just do it. I can promise that the only person who very much cares will be you. A surprising number of people won't even notice, and the most common reaction from those that do is, "Oh well."

People dress in all sorts of unusual clothes for all sorts of reasons, so you'll just fit into that same niche.

Believe it or not, the reactions of my family make me more nervous than those of the general public since I still live at home (can't really afford to live anywhere else) and my family tend to be critical of anything different or unusual. I have no significant other to be concerned about, just a dog who obviously won't give a rat's about what I wear (or don't wear). Since I tend to favor somewhat baggy shorts anyway, and I generally don't sit as if my testicles are the size of bowling balls, I doubt most people would even notice if I switched to a skirt or kilt unless they were paying close attention to my legs.

Caultron wrote:A lot of us here have started out buying skirts in thrift stores because they're so cheap you can do a lot of experimenting. They're also great for finding your size. Bring a tape measure, look for a width that matches your waist size, and then go from there.

I really should work up the courage to try this.

Caultron wrote:If you need sighted assistance in physical stores, I presume you have someone who usually does that for you. So just matter-of-factly tell them you want to try wearing a skirt and ask them to help. If it helps, go when the store isn't likely to be busy.

This is a common assumption that doesn't hold for all blind people. Many of us actually get our sighted assistance in physical stores from the staff rather than people we know, which does have its disadvantages. For example, sometimes a staff member doesn't know what the store sells or has in stock (this can be fun or awkward depending on the person and what you're looking for), sometimes they seem like they're in a hurry (this always makes me feel like I'm an inconvenience instead of a customer), or both (which is just plain stressful). Online shopping really levels the playing field when it comes to finding products if you have a good idea of what you want.

Caultron wrote:I buy a lot of skirts on Amazon and others here buy from eBay. But any on-line site that sells clothing will do.

I prefer getting deliveries sent to parcel locker or parcel collect locations provided by Australia Post, which actually limits my choice to websites who send their deliveries via Australia Post or a courier who is prepared to lodge parcels with Australia Post for delivery. I prefer these options for an added sense of privacy and so I don't need to wait around for deliveries.

Caultron wrote:As to your dimension, I'd recommend something roomy and at least knee-length. Utility kilts are worth considering.

So thanks for joining the group and I hope we can help you on your journey. Please keep us up-to-date and feel free to ask as many questions as you like.

I currently wear cargo pants that come to just below my knees, and never wear trousers if I have a choice. I loathe bifurcated long pants of all kinds. Truth be told, I'd rather wear an ankle length skirt than a pair of trousers, but I think I would be most comfortable in a knee-length skirt as you suggest. heh I have a pair of huge towels that are like long dresses when I wrap them around myself (they go from my armpits to the floor), they feel nice to walk around in (though I tend to only use them going from bathroom to bedroom).

Fred in Skirts wrote:

Welcome to shirt Cafe. Do not worry about your size I am of the very large plus size myself and I wear skirts all of the time in fact I have not worn pants or shorts in over three years. I love the comfort and ease of getting dressed that skirts give you.

Once again Welcome.

Thanks. Are we talking a "very large plus size" as in the ball park of a 127cm (50in.) waist and a weight of 130kg?

When you think about it, bifurcated pants are actually an expensive concept for big people (I don't know how many pairs of shorts I wore holes into from my legs rubbing against each other).

webboy42 wrote:Thanks. Are we talking a "very large plus size" as in the ball park of a 127cm (50in.) waist and a weight of 130kg?
When you think about it, bifurcated pants are actually an expensive concept for big people (I don't know how many pairs of shorts I wore holes into from my legs rubbing against each other).

I have a 52 in waist. But my thighs don't rub against each other.
I find that knee length are my favorite for summer wear and mid calf length for winter wear.

Fred in Skirts wrote:I have a 52 in waist. But my thighs don't rub against each other.

heh I think that actually happened more back when I weighed about 170kg (about a year or 2 ago).

Which materials do you like for your winter and summer skirts? Any favorite materials? At this point I'm thinking that I would probably go for a cotton or cotton/spandex blend (the only materials I have experience with in my shorts that I like).

webboy42 wrote:Which materials do you like for your winter and summer skirts? Any favorite materials?

Most of my favourite summer skirts are lightweight rayon which is wonderfully soft and floaty; wintertime calls for wool or very heavy cotton, usually long and with a petticoat. Spring/autumn can be a mix of almost anything and varies with what the weather is doing at the moment.

Satins and velvets are absolutely wonderful fabrics as well, and, depending on what else they're worn with can be easily adapted to all four seasons save for the absolute height of summer.

webboy42 wrote:

Caultron wrote:If you need sighted assistance in physical stores, I presume you have someone who usually does that for you. So just matter-of-factly tell them you want to try wearing a skirt and ask them to help. If it helps, go when the store isn't likely to be busy.

This is a common assumption that doesn't hold for all blind people. Many of us actually get our sighted assistance in physical stores from the staff rather than people we know, which does have its disadvantages. For example, sometimes a staff member doesn't know what the store sells or has in stock (this can be fun or awkward depending on the person and what you're looking for), sometimes they seem like they're in a hurry (this always makes me feel like I'm an inconvenience instead of a customer), or both (which is just plain stressful). Online shopping really levels the playing field when it comes to finding products if you have a good idea of what you want...

No problem. I was clearly just guessing about who might assist you. Obviously, everyone's situation is different.

And sorry about the poor treatment from certain store clerks. But if things aren't going well, you really should politely tell the clerk, "I'm sorry, but I'm not getting what I need from you. Is there someone else who can help me?" Because I'm sure they're not going to throw you out for being legally blind and needing assistance. And if they did, you'd be a wealthy man.

Welcome!

I work in a store and I take pains to talk to the disabled. We get a few in in wheelchairs and I make sure that I lean over the counter, it's just above waist height, and talk to them and not just the person with them. I don't see why they should be ignored just because they are at a lower height. My oldest son's wife is bl;ind so I am getting used to her and her disability. It doesn't stop her doing crazy things like scuba diving, wing walking or driving a sports car around a circuit at about 100mph assisted.

Grok wrote:Welcome!

Thanks.

Sinned wrote:I work in a store and I take pains to talk to the disabled. We get a few in in wheelchairs and I make sure that I lean over the counter, it's just above waist height, and talk to them and not just the person with them. I don't see why they should be ignored just because they are at a lower height.

This is good to hear.

Sinned wrote:My oldest son's wife is bl;ind so I am getting used to her and her disability. It doesn't stop her doing crazy things like scuba diving, wing walking or driving a sports car around a circuit at about 100mph assisted.

She's far more adventurous than I am. I'm just happy when I can get through the day without someone "helpfully" shouting out from the other side of the road when I can cross it. It's a good thing I have a strong heart, because "helpful" people have this nasty habit of sneaking up and scaring the living daylights out of me.

And speaking of helpful people, part of me wants to wear a skirt just to see if those same "helpful" people will decide to ask, "do you realize you're wearing a skirt?" Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me if someone did do that. Blindness is one of two broad categories of disability (that I can think of) which are more often than not apparent from appearance alone (owing to the use of a mobility aid), and it flips a switch in some people's head that makes them treat us as deaf, dumb, stupid, or helpless.

I've learnt that having a physical disability such as blindness doesn't naturally make one deaf, stupid or mentally infirm. My daughter-in-law is hardly that as she has two degrees. She's highly intelligent. You're a human being and should be treated as such. In terms of customers it's just plain good customer service.

Hi Webboy42,

Welcome to the cafe.

I'm also from Brisbane (Morningside), good to know there's a few more of us out here.
I have seen a few men out there in kilts and skirts before, but not many.

Would be good if you can find a skirt or kilt in your size, and get out there.