dpinNE wrote:It would have interesting to read those "comments" that you both deleted.
Okay, you asked for it... and I'll go on to say I'm less animated now than I was last night, so you're still getting the "lite" version...
The only advice I can give is what I would do in your personal situation. That said, my personality is that of the minority and I'll admit wouldn't be workable for most people in the same situation.
To put it bluntly, if you do what I would do, from the looks of it you stand a good chance of being homeless, divorced, kidless, and possibly unemployed. But that's just my personal nature, I'd rather live on the street than live under someone's thumb.
Obviously most people would not be willing to sacrifice so much for what amounts to a such a frivolous ideal, that of simply wearing a skirt. I suppose the logical answer would be that a garment simply isn't worth such sacrifice. But as for me personally, it's more than just a garment, it's a fundamental right.
My mind reasons, if I can't wear something as simple as a skirt, despite the fact that doing so isn't illegal, unethical, or immoral, then where do my masters draw the line? Before you know it I'm being told what to eat, how to eat, where to work, what profession, what God to pray to, and worst of all, how to THINK. Before you know it, I'm living under complete oppression. And I believe this act must be nipped in the bud!
Out of respect for my wife, I will not engage in activities that I wouldn't want her engaging in, such as infidelity, excessive debt without consultation of the other, major life changes like quitting a job, buying a house or car, etc. But what to slip on in the morning is of little consequence, and I don't need anyone's permission on what to, or not to wear!
This is not to say that we don't fight, or lord yes we do, and do we ever! We fight often. But the fact is, I don't tell her what to wear, and she won't tell me. If that ever becomes a problem, the yellow pages are full of divorce lawyers. I'd hate to go down that route, but I'd really hate being under someone's thumb. I've been divorced before. You survive. I don't really care... I don't need nor want a master, I'd like to have a partner in life. If I can't have that than I'll go it alone! It's a simple as that!
The light version of what I was going to say, was simply, a free man takes control of his life, and to hell with the consequences. If you can't do such simple little things, then you're not a free man. It really is quite black and white. You are either free, or you are not. If you don't expect your wife to wear skirts all of the time, than she shouldn't expect you to wear pants!
Some on this board will say to give it time, and gently nudge. Well, I'll agree with that, but this thread was started over a year ago. It sounds like you are no further along with the other half as you were when you started. If she hasn't budged by now she probably won't. Really, it comes down to a simple choice... do you want to live this way, or do you want to live another way? How important are these skirts to you? Are they worth your marriage? Are they worth the anxiety of always keeping them hidden? Do you enjoy sneaking around, or would you rather be free in the open?
If your marriage is more important, get rid of the skirts and wear pants. If the skirts are more important, get rid of the wife and keep the skirts. It sounds like to me that's what this boils down to.
Only you can decide how you want to handle this, I think I've been pretty clear on how I would. But again, you're mileage may vary.
I'm not just talking out of my butt, I practice what I preach. I have separated from my wife before. It was over, among other things, religion. But to me, religion is another one of those fundamental rights that I will not compromise on. Yes, I'm selfish and somewhat arrogant about my rights. Most will disagree with me, but I still will not waver. If it ever gets to be too much for my wife, I will not contest a divorce. I don't want her to be unhappy, and I don't want to make myself unhappy.
She came back a few months later, and six years later I still believe the same way. We still fight about it now and then, and I can't say for sure if we will grow old together or not, but one thing is for sure, if I live to be an old man, I'll still be wearing a pentacle around my neck and still be wearing skirts in my free time. If I'm not it will ONLY be because I CHOOSE not to!