Introduction

If you're new to the Cafe, please grab a seat by the potted palm, settle down with a nice big latte, and tell us a little bit about yourself. Please also look here for forum principles and rules.
Gmerc
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Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Good evening, Gentlemen

I have been pleasantly surprised to find this, and other forums, regarding a masculine concept of skirt wearing. Since my teens (some while ago) I have been dipping in and out of wearing skirts - a habit no one else knows about (yet).

Recently, I've been able to find my way through my own moral conundrums - I'm a practising christian & finding what is, for me, a way of staying true to my faith - something I want to do - & knowing there is a place in my belief system for my enjoying the wearing skirts has been a bit of a tough one. Still, I've found a 'place' where both these aspects of my life can be in harmony, & they are. A brief aside - if there's anyone else out there in a similar position with similar doubts and worries, I'd be happy to chat.

As for me, I'm in my mid 50's, living in the East of England who has been wearing skirts & feeling good about it for many years. So far, it's around the house but finding I am not alone - intellectually, I knew I wasn't but it doesn't always fel like that, does it - has increased my willingness to go public. In fact, if I can find the right kit, one of my closest friends could be in for a big shock when I pop round on Boxing Day.

What do I like? In the world of skirts, I quite like long (calf length) pencil skirts with a front or rear vent. I keep fit, so my shape is reasonable, although having my heart rebuilt earlier this year knocked my fitness regime for six. For the summer, I rather fancy a mini skirt for working in the garden - should look good with the workboots. The few skirts I do own are all ex charity shop, although I hope to get something new soon - a christmas present to me!

There are some nerves about stepping out but I am really looking forward to being even more honest with and about myself.

Finally, a question - do those of you who live relatively close together ever meet up?

Have yourselves a Great Christmas

Graham
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crfriend
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Re: Introduction

Post by crfriend »

Greetings Graham, and welcome aboard.

We've got a pretty diverse crowd here, geographically, professionally, and personally, so you're likely to find some common ground. Enjoy your time here and feel free to comment on things!
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STEVIE
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Re: Introduction

Post by STEVIE »

Hi and welcome,
I'm in a similar situation, relatively new to the cafe but on a definite journey in the skirt world. I would not ever rain on your parade but think carefully about how you "shock" your friend. You might wish to consider telling this person in advance about your fashion preferences, especially if you are talking about a multiple Christmas gathering. You don't want to put anyone off the turkey, do you?
I'm really not being flippant, I told my adult son quite recently and it went O.K. It may very well have been different, if I'd suddenly appeared skirted.
My best "mate" I told some years ago and he would have probably had a heart attack or something.
Having said that, the very best of luck to you.
Steve.
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Thanks for the welcome, guys - it's almost like being a kid at Christmas again.

Stevie, thanks for the warning, I appreciate what you say. My 'problem' is that my mate, whom I have known for many years - we used to work together in a theatre company, so we know each other really well - he responds to almost any kind of shock with the kind of facial acrobatics that make you wish you had a camera floating over your shoulder. However, I think I must give him some warning; after all he's been one of my closest friends for 15 years - some things are more important than good facial gymnastics! Thankfully, its not a family gathering so, in that respect, things are fairly clear. I'll let you know if/how it goes.

Graham
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ethelthefrog
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Re: Introduction

Post by ethelthefrog »

Graham, welcome to the café.

I joined this year, having discovered the joy of skirts in the spring. I'm mid-thirties, and committed Christian and, like you, in the east of England (Cambridge). Not worn a skirt to church, as yet, as my good lady wife is not comfortable with her guy being seen in public in one. Not sure really how the congrigation would react either...

Anyway, welcome.

Paul.
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Since1982
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Re: Introduction

Post by Since1982 »

:welcome: :welcome: Graham. There's a related site (related to this site) for the more masculine skirt wearing men called http://skirts4men.myfreeforum.org/ check it out. A lot of the same members at both sites. :D
I had to remove this signature as it was being used on Twitter. This is my OPINION, you NEEDN'T AGREE.

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ChrisM
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Re: Introduction

Post by ChrisM »

Paul and Graham, you make take solace in hearing that last night I wore a mid-calf pleated wool skirt to our city's caroling in the square. 8,500 people gather in the park, and then Monseigneur brings the crucifix in from the Cathedral while the crowd signs "Oh Come all ye...". An hour is spent singing Christmas carols (the Mayor lead the signing of one of them, and I was quite impressed with his voice!) and then we all traipse our way home.

I received numerous compliments on wearing the skirt (most called it a kilt) to this holiday gathering. The skirt is a bit of "dress up" compared to most menswear, and thus contributes to the holiday atmosphere.

Thus you may find that a skirt at church is easier during this season than at other times.

All the best,

Chris in New Orleans
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Hi Folks,

Thanks for your comments & responses - here are mine

ChrisM
Thanks for that, sounds like you had a brilliant evening. It's a bit more more staid over here & only the clergy & choir appear in robes - mind you it has been very cold here so I suspect everyone was well trousered underneath! I do look forward to the time when my wearing a skirt in church raises no eyebrows & distracts no one from their reason for going in the first place.

Skip
Thanks for your greeting & welcome: you do seem to be very good at touching base with us newbies - it is much appreciated. Thanks, too, for the heads up re skirts4men - I have visited & when Christmas subsides I will probably sign up there too.

Paul (ethelthefrog)
You have to be the closest guy to me, so far; I'm 50 miles down the A14 in Ipswich. The what to wear in church is a complex question, I can't even join the choir as my singing voice is dreadful, at least that's what the people next to me say! Keep in touch, mate.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Graham
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Uncle Al
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Re: Introduction

Post by Uncle Al »

Hi Graham and :welcome:

I've been remiss at not saying hello, but since I've started working again,
I'm very tired when I get home. I read a lot of the posts, but not much
energy to respond. (Then my wife wants to go somewhere.)

Anyway - - - :welcome:

Uncle Al
:mrgreen: :ugeek: :mrgreen:
Kilted Organist/Musician
Grand Musician of the Grand Lodge, I.O.O.F. of Texas 2008-2009, 2015-2016,
2018-202 ? (and the beat goes on ;) )
When asked 'Why the Kilt?'
I respond-The why is F.T.H.O.I. (For The H--- Of It)
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Just got back in from a night out with two very close friends. I had told them I wanted to tell them something, so after the film we nipped up to the cafe/bar thing which was thankfully empty & parked ourselves in the far corner. My rebuilt heart was going nineteen to the dozen but I was able to tell them about the choices I had made regarding my wardrobe; all the time worrying if I was going to lose two people who are very dear to me...

I didn't. In fact, they couldn't have been nicer or more understanding; telling me it was me they valued not the clothes I wore. I even went so far as to tell them I might be wearing a skirt when I visited them or they came to mine - didn't seem to blow them out of the water at all. Both of them are ex-colleauges from the theatre company and, like me, are active christians - so I got asked some interesting questions and the lady even offered me some advice on what sort of skirt she thought would look good on me.

I think, based on tonight, telling folk rather than letting them find out is the way to go. My friends aren't in a state of shock, in fact, they have offered me support & help. On top of which a good deal of the tension I'd been feeling went away. Good film too!

Graham
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Mugs-n-such
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Re: Introduction

Post by Mugs-n-such »

Hi there and welcome to Skirtcafe. I'm Gummug (Gary) and I believe I have beliefs similar to yours, have been attending a Presbyterian church. One of my best friends is a really good Christian and I asked him about it, and he said he didn't mind, so I have worn a skirt (I don't have any proper kilts yet) over to his house at least several times. His sister is also a good Christian and when I told her about making skirts and asking her if she wanted to see one I'd made she said to the effect "I don't want to see one unless you're wearing it" so I wore a denim just below knee skirt several times when we went out to eat together, she, her brother and I. His son is a pastor so I asked him if he (the pastor) thought it was OK for men to wear skirts. He said, again a paraphrase, my memory isn't that good, "it's better to wear a kilt, if you wear a skirt people might get the wrong idea but if you wear a kilt more than likely they won't look twice". So I'm still planning on getting that kilt! However, I do still occasionally wear a skirt...probably will wear it less once I get my kilt. Anyway my own .004 cents worth is that it's OK imo with God to wear a skirt depending on your motivations. If it's because it's comfortable and there's no logical reason for men not to wear a skirt then I think that's OK. Let's face it, Jesus didn't exactly wear pants now, did He? Well I've probably ranted and raved enough I'll get off my soap box now. When you mentioned being a Christian, that kinda slipped the dime into the old computer because I thought, "yeah! alright!" 'nuff said,
Gummug (Gary)
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Life races on! 24 hours after letting my close friernds into my wardrobe, I was at an evening meeting with my business partners - one of whom is an elder at my church. In the opening chit chat I was asked how I was, so I said I'd just picked a 45 year old scab off my life - I can get a bit fancy with my english - got a pair of odd expressions & promised to fill them in if we had time. It was one of the quickest business meetings I've been in! I have been amazed at the positive responses from my friends - I know the whole world ain't as nice but, for me, it's been a good start.

Anyway, I told them about my journey, the choices I've made & how I will be wearing skirts - just like I am now - whenever the mood takes me & the ocassion is right. Once again, far more support than I had been expecting plus another searching set of technical questions from our lady director. This trip is looking really exciting.

I haven't made it outside yet, at least not in the skirts I want to be seen in, but it's on my 'To Do' list for 2011.

Thanks to Uncle Al & Gary for your posts - Gary, no problem with hobby horse riding here - got a few of my own! You're so right about Jesus not wearing trousers - hopefully we can, bit by bit, see society's assumptions about guys in skirts changed.

Uncle Al,thanks for the welcome; I was so nervous when I registered, wondering what I was getting into. Now I just wish there was a way to get those coffees out of my laptop.I'm getting back into work after major surgery & it seems I got knocked back physically further than I thought. The strength does come back.

Catch you later!

Graham
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Since1982
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Re: Introduction

Post by Since1982 »

Gmerc said: I was asked how I was, so I said I'd just picked a 45 year old scab off my life -
I wasn't immediately confused by this at all. I just assumed that you'd recently parted ways with a life partner of some sort. If thats not IT, then I'm confused indeed. It doesn't matter to me though, whatever it is, I hope your life is better now. :D :D :D
I had to remove this signature as it was being used on Twitter. This is my OPINION, you NEEDN'T AGREE.

Story of Life, Perspire, Expire, Funeral Pyre!
I've been skirted part time since 1972 and full time since 2005. http://skirts4men.myfreeforum.org/
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Thanks, Skip, for the laugh - hopefully more intelligent follow up following!

The 45 year old scab refers to the confusion about the rightness of wearing skirts & dresses - the church wasn't too helpful in that regard - so I kept on trying to stop or change my behaviour. It's taken these 45 years (I have done a few other things during that time) to have things settle out in my heart & mind. Now they have, I am looking forward to a richer future.

Your guess was good, though. My wife has been suffering from clinical depression for 6 years & last April, 10 days after I was made redundant, she said being married to me was keeping her depressed, so she was leaving. It's been a tough 18 months but starting to sort the skirt issue has been one of good bits & Im looking forward to a few more!

Graham
Gmerc
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Re: Introduction

Post by Gmerc »

Life continues - I am slowly breaking cover among my friends (there isn't that much family left) &, so far, it seems to be going reasonably well. Having told my business partners, I kept quiet over Christmas, but I have informed my church leaders by e-mail; they have been remarkably unresponsive, which I'm hoping is due to excess of mince pies! Anyway, I've taken my next step & feel pretty happy about it - actually, despite the hideous events of the last 19 months, I do feel amazingly happy about the way my life is going.

Changing the subject entirely, I'd heard a lot about H&M selling skirts for men. When I checked out their website, it seems what they're selling are skorts - I was quite disappointed. On the credit side, I did find myself a good fitting denim skirt in a local charity shop.

2011 is starting to look like fun!

Graham
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