Skirt Cafe is an on-line community dedicated to exploring, promoting and advocating skirts and kilts as a fashion choice for men, formerly known as men in skirts. We do this in the context of men's fashion freedom --- an expansion of choices beyond those commonly available for men to include kilts, skirts and other garments. We recognize a diversity of styles our members feel comfortable wearing, and do not exclude any potential choices. Continuing dialog on gender is encouraged in the context of fashion freedom for men. See here for more details.
If you're new to the Cafe, please grab a seat by the potted palm, settle down with a nice big latte, and tell us a little bit about yourself. Please also look here for forum principles and rules.
I’m 22. And still nervous about the whole wearing skirts in public thing. Though I desperately want to do it for real.
Zanus, The only way you will be able to do it for real is to face your fears head on and just go out and enjoy your skirts. As most of us who have been skirting in public for years have found those fears are only in your head.. I have been skirting in public now for over 5 years full time and have not had a bad experience in all of that time.
I only wear skirts and dresses and as I said no problems.
So screw your head on tight and remember "The only thing you have to fear is fear itself".
Fred
Fred
"The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle."
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
Welcome to the Café. I second what both Fred and OldSalt1 said.
I'm 69 and started wearing skirts and dresses in public while presenting as a man in 2015. On average, excluding my brother and his wife, I have had 1 hostile encounter per year. None of them were in any way physically threatening. It's not just that I live in that hotbed of liberal, laissez-faire thinking, Portland, Oregon; I have worn skirts and dresses in 5 states and counting. I wear them to church -- it was one of the first places I wore a dress, hose and heels -- and work. In fact, I interviewed for my current job in a skirted suit, scarf blouse and t-strap heels.
I have worked with construction workers as the owner's rep in a dress and heels, bought hardware and car parts and usually go to my sports car club events in a skirt or dress. Indeed, the club president's wife introduced me to a new, female member as someone who "everyone looks to see what he is wearing."
Definitely, the case at our Christmas Party. All eyes were on me when I entered the venue in my red, sequined evening gown. I saw one woman give me a thumbs up. The other looks I noticed were approving if not admiring. In the dinner line a woman marveled at my ability to walk down the gangplank to the floating clubhouse where the dinner/dance was held in heels.
If an old guy like me can get that kind of approval, a young guy like you will knock them dead!
Trust me, I wouldn't have gotten this kind of reception 15 or 20 years ago, but today it's a whole new world!
As OldSalt1 suggested, take enough stealth walks outside that you begin to feel comfortable and then escalate. Understand that like me, every time you're about to push another self-described boundary, you'll do it with trepidation. Yes, you read it right, like me! I fully expected to not get the job I interviewed for in a skirt. Fooled me! I did it anyway because I wanted to get past that fear. Good thing I took the chance!
Not only did I get the job, but I proved to myself, once again, that almost without exception, things work better when you are your genuine self. Even when they don't turn out the way I want; I later realize, I dodged a bullet I didn't see at the time.
So, for your own sake, BE. YOUR. GENUINE. SELF. You'll be so much happier for it, you won't believe it.
And, you will inspire so many more people than you will ever know to be their genuine self.
David, the PDX Fashion Pioneer
Social norms aren't changed by Congress or Parliament; they're changed by a sufficient number of people ignoring the existing ones and publicly practicing new ones.
Started 2020
I wear a skirt full time now. Even to work. It took about 5 months to do it every day
Amazed how little response i have seen. Probably a lot under the table.
Wondering how long does it take for the anxiety of being the only guy wearing a skirt go away.
Even in a small city.
Always feel that i am be judged even tho i think very it is from very few.
Started 2020
I wear a skirt full time now. Even to work. It took about 5 months to do it every day
Amazed how little response i have seen. Probably a lot under the table.
Wondering how long does it take for the anxiety of being the only guy wearing a skirt go away.
Even in a small city.
Always feel that i am be judged even tho i think very it is from very few.
Greetings,
Looks like you have just joined/logged in -- welcome. You may want to explore the site categories a bit to see where questions fit or have been answered. The skirts and kilts section may be a good start. Your question is not one with a specific answer as it seems to vary with each person. For some it takes a long time; others have adapted very quickly, though I doubt ones 'awareness' is ever completely lost, comfort levels may match the days of so-called normal or more conforming attire in a few weeks or months. Anyway, enjoy exploring the site, lots of good info. And share a bit more about yourself here in introductions. Sounds like a grand start. A few of the guys do wear their skirts daily, some at work; other like myself are retired now but choose skirts or dresses full time.
...Wondering how long does it take for the anxiety of being the only guy wearing a skirt go away.
There's no set answer, but you will know you have got there when someone reacts and you have to stop and think "Why are they reacting like that to me? Oh yes, I forgot, I am wearing a skirt."
There is no such thing as a normal person, only someone you don't know very well yet.
