Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
As has been mentioned in other threads, this sort of official policy is a farce. The (unofficial) taboo against boys in skirts persists, and The Powers That Be know that bullies will enforce it.
Change will not come from school boys, because it is too easily crushed.
Change will not come from school boys, because it is too easily crushed.
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 2649
- Joined: Mon Dec 16, 2019 4:40 am
- Location: Southeast Michigan
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
I was picked on in school - but nothing particularly bad. In retrospect I caused myself more harm by being bland and boring - but there's no way I would have been able to wear a skirt or anything non-conforming - that would have brought stares, derision, and would ensure I remained more of an outcast than I already felt. I also had a bigger fear of others than I should have - but sigh, so is life. I think seeing bullies on TV made me fearful of bullies in school - but the danger just wasn't there for me where I went to school.
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 541
- Joined: Fri Dec 03, 2010 9:05 pm
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
I was bullied in school because I was small. The moment someone else was revealed to be smaller the bullying transferred to him. Bullying pressures in my school were so intense they led to at least one suicide. Both boys and girls were horribly bullied, and the bullies did not even have reasons like people presenting any aspect of the other gender or being gay. In my senior year there were about 100 people. Half a century later not a single person out of that 100 has come out as gay or trans or any other sexual or gender variant and normal stats suggest there would have been a few. I suspect that early bullying was sufficient to put anyone off going public. I would like to think that times have changed and that with so many young people today openly pursuing alternative lifestyles they can be who they want to be but social media have opened up a whole new raft of bullying possibilities.
My history of being bullied is not what puts me off going fully public with my skirt and dress wearing, which for me sometimes includes presenting as a woman. It is simply that I have achieved something with my life and it is this I wish to be remembered for, not as the guy in the dress. I also feel it would detract from my professional authority - it shouldn't, but it almost certainly would, because my contemporaries and peers are of similar age to me and have been conditioned by their histories. I don't fear modern bullying - just a reduction in my status.
My history of being bullied is not what puts me off going fully public with my skirt and dress wearing, which for me sometimes includes presenting as a woman. It is simply that I have achieved something with my life and it is this I wish to be remembered for, not as the guy in the dress. I also feel it would detract from my professional authority - it shouldn't, but it almost certainly would, because my contemporaries and peers are of similar age to me and have been conditioned by their histories. I don't fear modern bullying - just a reduction in my status.
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 4187
- Joined: Fri Sep 17, 2010 11:01 pm
- Location: North East Scotland.
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
.........and the powers that be can relax in the full and certain knowledge that they done their duty toward the public reputation of the school.
I bet they are falling over themselves in the realisation that they may not ever be asked to consider the question again.
Not likely to happen but it would be poetic justice if a number of the boys did decide on a uniform skirt.
Yup, flying pigs.
Steve.
I bet they are falling over themselves in the realisation that they may not ever be asked to consider the question again.
Not likely to happen but it would be poetic justice if a number of the boys did decide on a uniform skirt.
Yup, flying pigs.
Steve.
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 1314
- Joined: Sat Oct 25, 2003 8:25 am
- Location: North Lincolnshire, UK
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
Grok wrote: ↑Fri Jul 01, 2022 1:54 pm As has been mentioned in other threads, this sort of official policy is a farce. The (unofficial) taboo against boys in skirts persists, and The Powers That Be know that bullies will enforce it.
Change will not come from school boys, because it is too easily crushed.
You are 100% correct.
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
Greetings Steve, sorry for the delayed replied -- our net has been down and we were away celebrating other things. Good question and I have wondered, more about the men here than the kids as I've been blatantly 'in their face' as I do wear skirts daily and it is a small region. I do know some of these men have worn skirts in public in other places and times -- yet I've not seen them here. I guess I should just boldly ask!by STEVIE » Thu Jun 30, 2022 1:31 pm
Hi Faldaguy
I found it very interesting that you said that you are seen in a school in a skirt but that you have not been emulated by a male student.
My turn to be curious, why do you think this is? In terms of simple tolerance, it sounds quite ideal and the Quaker movement is certainly renowned in this respect
As to the kids, I do think we have an environment where if they were so inclined they could easily do so (at least on campus) -- so the question is why don't they? I suspect there is just no inclination -- they are busy doing their things and not unhappy with the way things are --yet! They see me, accept me, work with me -- but I also suspect they still think, "those skirts are kind of silly" and they don't need silly in their life. Besides, it would be a nuisance to dig up a skirt. Here, style is pretty much non-existent, shockingly even in school.
Maybe I am minimizing they element of fear, bullying, or teasing that might arise-- and they just don't want to take that on. Yet, I continue to suspect that if a boy did wish to do so, the path would not be a lot different than for an adult. A kid's circle of friends and places tend to be smaller than adult circles, so perhaps that contributes to the reticence.
I'm delighted you've got your little gang of girls to chat with occasionally. I've wondered at times if I should 'push' the reasons behind my skirts, those aside from comfort, leaning toward freedom of choice and getting out of ruts. Moving away from stereotypes and conformity without compelling reason. Maybe then a few would break from the mold? But I too have had 'fears' -- wishing my skirts to be accepted as much as any garment without having to 'defend' or justify my presentation as that in some ways would seem to be branding myself as a kook if I had to explain my attire, rather than it just being clothing.
Has anybody else out there managed to find small groups (especially kids or at schools), that comfortably including another's odd-ball habits into their chatting? What opened the doors?
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 310
- Joined: Tue May 12, 2020 6:58 pm
- Location: Belgium, Charleroi
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
Yes but not only. I would tend to argue that at school, there are lots of small groups of friends, where at contrary in the street there are lots of people alone not knowing anyone else. Gangs are more common at school than in the street, and people feel strong in gang to provoke the lonely. Boys must be sure they're not going to be rejected by their friends if they want to don a skirt without becoming the vulnerable lonely.Maybe I am minimizing they element of fear, bullying, or teasing that might arise-- and they just don't want to take that on. Yet, I continue to suspect that if a boy did wish to do so, the path would not be a lot different than for an adult. A kid's circle of friends and places tend to be smaller than adult circles, so perhaps that contributes to the reticence.
-
- Member Extraordinaire
- Posts: 4187
- Joined: Fri Sep 17, 2010 11:01 pm
- Location: North East Scotland.
Re: Local school not allowing shorts but allowing skirts for boys and girls in gender neutral policy
Spiro, you have brought it full circle.
The male group or gang does not tolerate non-conformity in the same was as females might.
Boys know this and will hide so much more just to avoid being ostracised by their peers.
Steve.