While I agree that the confines of the standard male wardrobe feel like a straight jacket sometimes, I don't agree that makes any step outside of those confines necessarily makes us "non-binary" by any definition.
Sorry, but it does. All it means is that we do do something, present ourselves in a way that doesn't match the standard societal for a Man. It implies nothing about about your Sexual Identity, clearly you identify as a Male, nor about your Sexual Orientation, clearly you consider yourself to be Heterosexual. Not that it matters but I do as well on both counts.
The difference between us seems to be that I accept that how one dresses is a big piece of their Gender Expression and therefore Gender Identity is how they dress. Secondly, it is crystal clear that how I dress is different from the societal norm for a cis-gender male so in that sense, I am Nonbinary. Why does that term bother you?
Just look at the number of people here using looking "normal" and "natural" as the highest complement that can be given to a man's skirted outfit.
As a matter of fact, it was pointed out to me by a 20-something lady that the reason that people take the way I present myself so much in stride is that it is so natural and normal for me!
But some of us don't want to send a message at all. We don't want to be seen as gay or trans. We can be our "genuine selves" no matter what we are wearing. We just want a few more options of what to wear as men.
Did you read the portion of my post that you pulled? I didn't say I was delivering a message; someone else said I might delivering the wrong message and I was asking that person to tell us just what message that might be.
And what makes you think that I want anyone to think I am Gay, Trans-, Bi- or Lesbian for that matter. June was their month. Nonbinary Freedom Day is in July.
By the way, Nonbinary is why the young people stood the term "Queer" on its head and has rebranded it as the miscellaneous category in the diversity rainbow. That's why it's now LGBTQ+.
Misinterpreting is not hate.
You're right, poor choice of cliche on my part.
If you read the thread I started on "Miss-identification" you'll see that I suggested that we ALL take those situations in stride because unless someone's being hostile in the way they misidentify us, they probably just made an honest mistake.
But once men in skirts are "normalized," doesn't that mean that (by definition) skirts would be part of "normal" menswear, and therefore part of the (now larger) box of what is acceptable male behavior? Wouldn't that mean that men in skirts would then be firmly in the "binary" category, as opposed to your "non-binary" category that you are insisting we are all a part of? That's what I am working towards.
Not exactly. Normalized just means something that people aren't surprised to see anymore because they've seen it before.
Ultimately, what the Pride Movement would like to see is everyone's mind get so overloaded with all of the categories of diversity they say, "Enough already! We get it. Everyone's different and should be accepted and respected as they are and treated equally." Shortly afterwards all of the little dividers and labels for Sexual Identity, Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity will get yanked out of the box and the only label we'll be left with is the one outside of the big box that says, "Human Beings."
In the meantime, we're stuck with this alphabet soup and a certain percentage of the population that stigmatizes and marginalizes people who are different. If we're going to put that BS to rest we have to make common cause with the people we can lumped with and stand up together.
There are very big differences between drag, transgenderism, crossdressing, and (I would argue) men in skirts.
I don't know about very big differences, but differences for sure. Where did I say otherwise.
I may be mad about it, but I'm not for rioting, and don't want to be seen as associated with people engaging in wanton destruction for any reason.
Nor do I. Where did I say otherwise?
I was just trying to get across that gays and lesbians have had trouble accepting bisexuals and trans-folks as members as their community. Now that they have they are standing tall with them because they know that a segment of society tars all of them with the same brush. So they can either say, "You don't get it! I'm not one of them
!" And get picked off group by group.
Or they can stand up together, as they have, and say, "You're right! We're all different from you! What of it? And make no mistake, we're all in this together so an attack on one of us is an attack on ALL of us!"
By the way, it's the Human Rights Campaign (the largest LGBTQ+ political advocacy group in the US) that has gotten into law our right to wear skirts and dresses to work where women are allowed to wear them. Given that they have stood up for us, doesn't it make sense that we stand up with them to finish the short strokes?
lawsuits ... resentment
I have never filed a lawsuit about wearing skirts to work nor have anyone show any resentment for my doing so. In fact, the only one of my employers (I work as a temp so I kind of get around) where it came up was Intel. There I offered to go back to slacks if I got anyone's nose out of joint. My 2nd level immediately and emphatically said I had it backwards. If I had the first hint of disapproval from anyone, they wanted to know about it. Immediately. So they could nip it in the bud.
And not because they're worried about lawsuits. What they want is a work environment where no one feels out of place because of who they are. They want everyone to bring their genuine selves to work so they can comfortably and without any energy wasted on fear of disapproval do their work and give the company the benefit of their full individuality. And that's the way 21st century companies look at the whole issue of diversity.
Bear with me here, I'm trying to work around the constraints of our system and I kinda blew it so I can't do the quotes thing.
You made a reference to 'some of the other elements of their
agenda.' What agenda? All the Human Rights Campaign wants is that everyone gets treated equally and with dignity and respect. What have you got against that?
Like I said, I was trying to present an opportunity for some of our members who haven't yet to step outside in their skirt. I also wanted to make the point that we have people who are willing to ally themselves with us in getting the acceptance we want. Their banner is the Rainbow flag and their called the Pride/ Diversity Movement.