skirtcafe.org

Gentlemen

I'm not sure that the current postings are entirely helpful as regards usage.

Yes, we are members of a forum aimed at adults; although not an "adult" forum. Yes, we sometimes need to "thicken" our skins. Yes, we have members at various and differing stages of their personal journeys.

But, trying to look objectively, there is an aire of ganging up (no doubt unintentionally).

As regards taking offence; those two words point up that it is what we take from the phrase. Nobody says "Give offence"; we choose to " take offence". Seemingly there is a choice.

So, let's get back to the important business of the forum.

oldsalt1 wrote:But like I said sometimes it requires a thicker skin

It's no different from being a guy wearing a skirt in public. A thick skin is an asset because sooner or later some invective will be tossed at you and it'll be up to you to deal with it.

As I mentioned earlier, if we're to take offence at everything that might possibly cause such we'd not have much time for anything else and would work ourselves into a lather for no good reason.

Just for the record, the "harsh" terms used for one of Oldsalt's outfits both came from me -- and he and I are still on speaking terms. It's all in how the message is delivered. I intended no malice and was simply making an observation and filtering it through my own "life-lens".

Trust me: if malice is intended, you usually know it.

crfriend wrote:Trust me: if malice is intended, you usually know it.

A truer statement has rarely been made, especially around the Café. I read Crfriends comments with an eager eye most of the time as they do contain very useful information. I will not say that I agree with him on everything he says but the information is useful whether I agree with it or not. No matter who makes a post here, take the information and understand the intent and if you agree then use that information and if you disagree then toss it out, in either case you have learned something.

Just remember one very important thing, The only dumb question is the one not asked. The only useless information is that not passed along.

Hoborob wrote in part, "The only dumb question is the one not asked."

This gave me a flash-back to basic training - US Arming - 1969 when a
drill sergeant made the same statement. A young draftee (not me)
stood up and asked how deep was the motor pool!

After 50 push-ups, he was told to sit down and keep his mouth shut.

But, your point is well take.

PatJ wrote:After 50 push-ups, he was told to sit down and keep his mouth shut.

I love it! However, the push-ups weren't for "asking a dumb question" they were for "being a wise-arse".

But, your point is well take.

I make no bones about seeing to it that folks ask me about something that may not be well-understood because if somebody does something wrong with something, the consequences can be spectacular. I'd rather deal with a potentially inane question or two than possibly face a mess that'll require a lot of work to mop up.

In the Netherlands we have a saying: a fool can ask more than 10 wise men can answer. I hope my translation is correct.
But I hope you question everything, as Morgan Freeman would say.