Whoops.........what should I do?

[Miket]

My wife knows I wear skirts/kilts and is moderately supportive. My youngest son, currently living at home and in the Sixth Form at the local school, does not! At least, he did not.....until today........

I am currently looking for a full time job and often at home during the day, my son went off on a school trip today to a Careers Fair at the University of Bath. When I settled down to work at the computer I thought I wuld slip into the new Douglas kilt I had purchased off Ebay (£12.01 - what a bargain!) It looked great, I felt great and then.....

just after 2 pm (about an hour and a half before normal school finish time) there is an explosion through the door and my son, and about 8 of his school friends burst in, having returned from their trip.

What would you do?

I hastened upstairs to change, but they had gone by the time I returned......

Have I damaged my son psychologically? Will he ever recover from the shock?

[Since1982]

Find him some information on the internet about how masculine and strong the various Scottish regiments have been and how they are proud of wearing the kilt, perhaps if you can afford it, buy him one for himself. Don't nag him to wear it, let him keep it in his room and sometime when he's home all day he just might try it on. Then he'll be hooked..... Just hang it up somewhere in his room that he can see it and quickly hide it if a friend comes to visit. He just might start researching the net himself to find out the history of the kilt. Maybe buy him a dvd of Braveheart or Rob Roy... Just a thought

[Foppy]

I highly doubt he'll be "psychologically damaged" or anything. He and some school kids saw you wearing a kilt. So what? If they're shocked by something like that, I hate to see how they react to something really shocking, like CNN. It's hardly anything to fret about. Don't worry.

[Kilted_John]

I highly doubt that he gave it much notice. If you had been dressed femininely, he might've had a shock to the system. Personally, I'd wear the kilt as often as possible. I suspect that he might even think it's cool and decide that he wants one too. So, don't worry about it.
-J

[cessna152towser]

IMHO, most youngsters nowadays are OK with a kilted parent and may themselves be keen to try the kilt. I have an adult daughter from a previous marriage who first encountered me wearing a kilt (the one in my avatar) when she was age 21. She asked me dad why are you wearing a skirt and when I said it's not a skirt it's a kilt she said that's cool and she's been happy to go places with me a few times since then while I'm kilted. Only today I was wearing the same black kilt to work as a Magistrates' Clerk. During the lunch break one member of the Bench told me he had just recently bought his first ever kilt. He had never worn one before but his two adolescent sons had gone out and bought themselves kilts so he thought he may as well try one too.

[crfriend]

My wife knows I wear skirts/kilts and is moderately supportive. My youngest son, currently living at home and in the Sixth Form at the local school, does not! At least, he did not.....until today........ [...]Have I damaged my son psychologically? Will he ever recover from the shock?

I sincerely doubt he got "damaged". After all, you were wearing a kilt -- a universally recognised male garment -- so really there can be no problem with it. If your son or his school-mates ask questions, answer them in a forthcoming manner, state that the kilt is a man's garment (and always has been) and is something you wear for personal taste and comfort. Children are pretty resilient, and they're surprisingly smart when it comes to some things. (Smarter than we sometimes give them credit for!)

You might be surprised that your son might want to don a kilt to "be like his old man". Wouldn't that be grand!

However, if you were wearing that frilly little French-maid outfit you wear when you and your wife are "in the mood" that might be another thing altogether. (the heck with that little smiley -- that last comment needs a HONKING BIG SMILEY with a prominent tounge in its cheek!!!!)

[binx]

Good grief, man...hopefully you have a loving, close relationship with your son...And who's the head of the household there anyway? If you're not in full drag, what's the problem? Goodness, if had to scurry off to change out of fear of what everyone close to me would think of me, I'd have to set my computer up in the closet each time I wore a kilt to surf skirt n' kilt forums. I answer the door, go to family gatherings, and go to work in a kilt...My grandson's uttered nary a word about them, and the daughter's wanting to borrow one.

binx

[AMM]

I'd worry more about the damage you do to your son by making him feel that his
dad is doing something he has to hide.

Kids are used to dealing with the fact that grown-ups do things that they the kids)
may not understand. ("He wants to do *what* with her?? Eeeew!")

But if he gets the idea that he's seeing something that he isn't supposed
to see, or that he is supposed to hide from everyone else, all of a sudden
life gets a lot more complicated -- and dishonest.

I have a kilt. I haven't confronted my kids with the fact, but it's not a secret
(nor to the folks in the grocery store I stop off at after my Scottish dance
group), and it hangs in the living room closet. They've never asked, and
they haven't been with me in a situation where I would be likely to wear it.
(I don't wear it casually, because it's not that comfortable.)

I have skirts &c. I am discrete about wearing them, because I don't want to
make my kids deal with other folks' reaction to my skirts (e.g., my ex-wife's,
their friends', their friends' parents'.)

I keep them in my bedroom closet, and don't wear the skirts where folks
who know them are likely to see them. But if my kids find out, I plan
to tell them as much of the truth as they want, and I don't plan to apologize.

[hiker]

But wearing skirts in private but not in public seems problematic to me. It implies that you are doing something wrong (or at least not proud of). Better to wear them in public or not at all. I understand peer pressure and I understand there are situations where skirts/kilts are inappropriate (work perhaps) but if you can't wear them to work in the yard or to the grocery store - maybe you shouldn't wear them at all.

[MtnBiker]

But wearing skirts in private but not in public seems problematic to me. It implies that you are doing something wrong (or at least not proud of). Better to wear them in public or not at all. I understand peer pressure and I understand there are situations where skirts/kilts are inappropriate (work perhaps) but if you can't wear them to work in the yard or to the grocery store - maybe you shouldn't wear them at all.

Well said, and I totally agree!

[skirttron]

It's a pity the careers fair wasn't in Bath the same time I went shopping there a-kilted a few weeks ago, then he'd have thought Bath was a cool place where everyone wore kilts.
You can always tell him you were a New Romantic when you were younger and have joined a re-enactment society.

[Skirt Chaser]

From the questions "Have I damaged my son psychologically?" and "Will he ever recover from the shock?" I am wondering what his reaction was. From your narrative I am not sure if he saw you in the kilt or not.

I'd worry more about the damage you do to your son by making him feel that his dad is doing something he has to hide.

AMM has pegged it, Miket. Kids will be fine with just about anything as long as they know what is going on. If you think there is something wrong with a man in a kilt he is going to learn that from you. If you don't want him getting that message you need to be comfortable with the way you want to dress before you can convince him. Here's a thought. Perhaps your son wants to wear kilts himself. I am sure you don't want him believing his father would not approve of him if he did.

Quiet Mouse