I've had a number of compliments about my skirts, mostly from women but rarely from men who seem to try to 'not notice'. So today I'm headed out to pick up the milk from my neighbor's dairy when I stopped at another neighbor to drop an item off to a youngish (40 yo) single bachelor who usually has 'eye candy' on or in his arms! After greetings his first comment was 'where was I headed, I was looking good, like maybe off to a dinner at the Reserve' while clearly checking out my skirt.
I think I was more surprised because I was wearing a simple straight green cotton skirt landing a couple inches above the knee paired with a nice linen tropical print shirt, dark green below, light green above and thought I was very casually dressed--something I might even wear in the shop. But as rare as it is for men to extend any comment, the compliment was a nice confirmation that some men are freeing up enough to acknowledge something positive about a non-conformist member of their set, and that MIS in particular can achieve positive recognition from other males.
I don't seek or keep tabs on compliments, but do enjoy those that come and hope you too may see the barriers weakening a bit with the occasional positive comment from other men that don't personally choose to wear skirts themselves.
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Regarding normalisation of skirt wearing by men, I prefer no compliments about my skirt because people never complimented me on my pants.
I guess some might fear that same sex compliments would have the same connotation as same sex anything else.
They are rare indeed. Compliments from women are much more common, in fact I got one last weekend.
Justice Robert H. Jackson
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With women it is different. I have had quite long chats which were initiated by a compliment. Styles, designs or accessories, with some women there is no subject which is taboo.
All part of the fun guys.
I don't really mind not getting compliments. As Denimini said, I wouldn't have been getting compliments on my clothes if I was wearing trousers and a shirt. The less people mention the skirts to me the better. But if people are genuinely curious/interested i'm happy to discuss with them.
I was farily warm with tights on, I figured it was the closest thing to a compliment as the guy had a grin on his face but it all seemed to be in good humor. Men generally don't compliment each other, if anything it's a quick "nice jeans / jacket" etc as they may not want to be seen as checking another guy out...
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That and noticing this thread topic (I am an infrequent member of this forum), reminded me of the only male compliment and he added that he wished he had the nerve to do so. His wife was present and added that she would be quite happy but his reply was that he could not face a society as it is. I did let him know my experiences and that the small minority are just that and always at a distance but it was no good.
For a little background, all the skirts I wear I have made from what were once pants. I work in a store where we buy and sell used entertainment and so I am more likely to have conversations with more or less random people than I would truly prefer. My favorite states are silent and alone, but anyway . . .
The first guy was a very extroverted, talks-too-much kind of person (the absolute opposite of myself). He kept going on and on about the website he started and how he was looking for partners to help him get it off the ground and I don't know what all. He started asking me about how quickly I could make the skirts and then started speculating on the overhead involved in buying pants wholesale to have me make into skirts. I just kind of nodded and got in a few things like "Well, gee, I . . . " and "I dunno if . . . " I just wanted to help him find the movie he asked for. I certainly never called the number on the card he gave me or even glanced at his website.
The other guy is more the dirty hippy in a local band sort. Nice enough. I've seen him at the store a couple times and the first time he asked if I'd make skirts on commission. I gave some kind of non-committal response. Then I saw him in the store last week and he asked again. This time I said that I didn't think I would, but that I'd be willing to explain how I do it as it's relatively simple. I suppose I could make a bit of cash that way, but I just don't want to be intimate enough with someone I don't know to make something they'll wear, like, on their bodies. And how much is a busker gonna pay me anyway?
But, there you go, if you can call interest in my work a compliment, I've gotten some!
Someone once told me not to turn down a job, just give the price you'd actually do it for. You may think it's so high as to tell them to get lost, but they might be happy to pay your "I don't want to work with you, but if you pay enough..." price. Just saying...Heckno wrote: ↑Sat Jun 19, 2021 9:14 am... I've seen him at the store a couple times and the first time he asked if I'd make skirts on commission. I gave some kind of non-committal response. Then I saw him in the store last week and he asked again. This time I said that I didn't think I would, but that I'd be willing to explain how I do it as it's relatively simple. I suppose I could make a bit of cash that way, but I just don't want to be intimate enough with someone I don't know to make something they'll wear, like, on their bodies. And how much is a busker gonna pay me anyway?
Plus, you could probably just convert a pair of pants without ever getting close to the guy. Just ask for a pair that fits him, then take it home and start cutting...
I suppose I do shy away from or cut short interactions like these because of my social anxiety. In the moment, it doesn't really occur to me that this is an opportunity to grow, I just retreat to my comfort zone as quick as I can. Maybe if hippy guy mentions it again, I'll suggest a price, take a number, and start a social adventure! It makes me nervous to think about it, and I promise nothing, but, well we'll see.