Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

General discussion of skirt and kilt-based fashion for men, and stuff that goes with skirts and kilts.
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Skaterswaltz
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Skaterswaltz »

This is a great thread. Thanks for the lead, Stevej180. In addition to the functionality of all my dozen or so skirts, there are some in which I feel sexy. It's important to me. The word 'hobby' is more accurate as stated above. Strolling around like the Rocky Horror Show could be more fetish, but you'd more or less have to go to a specialist store for those items. Anyone doing that has my vote and full respect.
There might be some gender expression. Everyone has come to life from a woman's body. It takes some confidence to go public with what we do; but the tremendous amount I have received has outnumbered that to the nth extent.
In life, I have found one criticism has had more effect than ten compliments at times. Wearing a skirt, however, one compliment outshines ten or many more negatives. I can't for sure say that, over the past year, I have been slighted. Sniggers might not be at my wearing a skirt. I could have walked by at the time of a gag being cracked or a scenario reaching a conclusion. Let's not be paranoid; and by that I'm talking future as nobody is being so here. I've got to such a sky high confidence level (if I could package some and send it as a link or attachment, I would) that Wilde's maxim of, "The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about" springs delightfully to mind. A couple of my most worn skirts have pleats, glide to just above the knee, and can give the impression they are kilts. But when people ask if it's a skirt, or say they like my skirt, it makes me feel tremendous. I got them in the feminine section, on the racks called Skirts.
Gender expression, comfort, feeling perhaps a little naughty, a hobby for sure, but not sexual fetish. And for those who feel they do, fabulous. Respect!
Again, well done Steve, and everyone on what is another interesting discussion. Bravo!
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TheSkirtedMan
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by TheSkirtedMan »

Sinned wrote: Sun Jun 06, 2021 2:50 pm TSM, the short presentation by Quita Christison called, "See The Other Person" is well worth a watch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=413_sACCuH8
Sinned. Just watched and concur. Some will adopt STOP, however many in society will ignore STOP. It has never changed in a millennia and more on many aspects. It's the human failing. Some still behave the same now as they did in the past but via different tools. As the population increases the percentage size of the respectful increases. So I adopt Be Yourself, Be You and damn the rest. The respectful do not have an issue, the others are not worth thinking about.

Today on duty as Room Steward at the Hall only one couple had a negative attitude and brought my attire up. I gave as much back. Another couple had the opposite approach and admired "my bravery". Another compliment received, the rest was as if I wore trousers i.e. nothing. One couple queried slide show about the hall, told them I do that now for the Hall the only one and they are contacting their programme coordinator and not a hint of would I come as I was today or even suggest leave the skirt at home. Many do not see clothes as an issue but I do believe it helps by the wearers demeanour as well.
Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.
Stevej180
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Stevej180 »

new2skirts wrote: Thu Feb 18, 2021 3:46 pm Take a look at Mark Bryan on Instagram, who has really shown the world that clothes have no gender :wink:
If only that were true. I think clothes *should* have no gender, but lots of them do. If they didn’t, this forum wouldn’t exist, right? I feel like the crudsade - if that’s the right word - is to make skirts and other items of clothing truly non-gendered. But we’re here precisely because society still ascribes gender to skirts, and we want to challenge that.

From the responses, some say they just like skirts and the freedom and feel that they offer, and wish they weren’t so heavily gendered.
Others - me included - wear them precisely because they are gendered and therefore enable us to express our feminine side.

I would love to live in a society that allowed everyone to express themselves in any way they wish - including their clothing choices, without judgement. One day…. :-)
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crfriend
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by crfriend »

Stevej180 wrote: Sat Jun 19, 2021 8:18 pmBut we’re here precisely because society still ascribes gender to skirts, and we want to challenge that.
Sometimes I can't help but get the feeling that we're tilting at windmills here.

Why we desire to wear skirts doesn't really matter all that much -- what matters is whether we have the option.
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Fred in Skirts
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Fred in Skirts »

crfriend wrote: Sun Jun 20, 2021 1:00 am
Stevej180 wrote: Sat Jun 19, 2021 8:18 pmBut we’re here precisely because society still ascribes gender to skirts, and we want to challenge that.
Sometimes I can't help but get the feeling that we're tilting at windmills here.
Why we desire to wear skirts doesn't really matter all that much -- what matters is whether we have the option.
Well we do have the option to wear skirts and dresses at least from what I see. When I am out and about no one has bothered me about my skirts or tried to have me arrested and put in jail. It all depends on how we as skirt wearers act when we go out in public. If we act as though it is nothing new or wrong then no one seems to care what we are wearing. I have not had but one disparaging comment and that was when I first started to wear skirts in public and came from a bible thumper that was working at wally world. I put her in her place and the shopper behind me gave me a big thumbs up.
So since we has the option, lets put it to use and go out there SKIRTED.
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
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TheSkirtedMan
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by TheSkirtedMan »

Fred in Skirts wrote: Sun Jun 20, 2021 5:59 am Well we do have the option to wear skirts and dresses at least from what I see. When I am out and about no one has bothered me about my skirts or tried to have me arrested and put in jail. It all depends on how we as skirt wearers act when we go out in public. If we act as though it is nothing new or wrong then no one seems to care what we are wearing. I have not had but one disparaging comment and that was when I first started to wear skirts in public and came from a bible thumper that was working at wally world. I put her in her place and the shopper behind me gave me a big thumbs up.
So since we has the option, lets put it to use and go out there SKIRTED.
I am with Fred in Skirts here. I note the comments from others about restrictions on men and clothing choice but for men there are only two restrictions, the man himself and his partner. The latter is covered on another thread and a difficult one to resolve.

If it is purely down to the man himself then as Fred in Skirts says, there is no law forbidding men and you will not go to jail. In 10 years of skirt wearing in public and from my other posts you will know I wear them practically all the time in most situations, socially, volunteering, medical, restaurants etc and only once had a direct rebuke. A few negative looks by some but a small minority and I ignore. As Fred in Skirts says "it all depends on how we as skirt wearers act when we go out in public". I get many compliments.

As Fred in Skirts says, "lets put it to use and go out there SKIRTED".
Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.
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JeffB1959
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by JeffB1959 »

Fred in Skirts wrote: Sun Jun 20, 2021 5:59 am
crfriend wrote: Sun Jun 20, 2021 1:00 am
Stevej180 wrote: Sat Jun 19, 2021 8:18 pmBut we’re here precisely because society still ascribes gender to skirts, and we want to challenge that.
Sometimes I can't help but get the feeling that we're tilting at windmills here.
Why we desire to wear skirts doesn't really matter all that much -- what matters is whether we have the option.
Well we do have the option to wear skirts and dresses at least from what I see. When I am out and about no one has bothered me about my skirts or tried to have me arrested and put in jail. It all depends on how we as skirt wearers act when we go out in public. If we act as though it is nothing new or wrong then no one seems to care what we are wearing.
I couldn't agree more. The proper attitude is everything when it comes to men wearing skirts and dresses.
I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman.
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denimini
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by denimini »

Yes, for most of us we do have the option and it is just a matter of taking it up. There are the few with partners or other loved and repected friends or relatives who have a problem and taking up that option can be complicated.
As not to be repetitive; my experiences are similar to Fred in Skirts and TheSkirtedMan, hence I endorse their advice.
Anthony, a denim miniskirt wearer in Outback Australia
STEVIE
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by STEVIE »

denimini wrote: Thu Jun 24, 2021 11:19 am Yes, for most of us we do have the option and it is just a matter of taking it up.
So true but there were 13 countries as of 2020 where any form of perceived "cross dressing" would incur some legal sanction.
Anything from a fine to custody and that does not include areas where it would just be damn stupid for a guy to appear in a skirt or anything else deemed feminine.
Partners, families and other nay sayers could just be the tip of the iceberg for some men.
"Just do it", easier said than done.
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Faldaguy »

by STEVIE » Thu Jun 24, 2021 10:02 am

So true but there were 13 countries as of 2020 where any form of perceived "cross dressing" would incur some legal sanction.
Anything from a fine to custody and that does not include areas where it would just be damn stupid for a guy to appear in a skirt or anything else deemed feminine.
Partners, families and other nay sayers could just be the tip of the iceberg for some men.
"Just do it", easier said than done.
Steve.
I prefer to think that leaves 200+ where it is not a legal problem. I don't think there is any custom, practice, or law that is uniform across the universe. For the great majority, the primary barrier is only in their head -- it really is pretty much a simple, "just do it". Let's focus on the positive and not the handful of obstacles. I tend to tell the few who query-- if a man hasn't got the balls to wear a skirt, he deserves what he is stuck with.
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e2k2houck
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by e2k2houck »

I think it all comes down to the individual, is doesn't matter why you are wearing a kilt or skirt, if its gender expression, hobby or just because you want to, just do it. I started wearing skirts, hiking skirts, after my GF and I were backpacking and bumped into a guy doing the CDT wearing a kilt. He told me how comfortable it is and cut down on chafing. Well I did some research and found several articles on it. So I figured why not I'll give it a try. I found some hiking skirts and bought them. I did a couple hikes and he was right they were awesome. I now have a closet full of hiking skirts. They are so comfortable that I wear them all the time, except at work, have to wear a uniform, and when I ride the motorcycle. My friends and family are all ok with it and have never had anyone say anything negative in any way.
Brad
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Brad »

I mostly wear skirts because I like them and feel good wearing them. There is no fetish in it for me. However, there is something that bothers me. I hope the moderators will give me a little leeway here. The first time I ever tried on pantyhose, I got sexually aroused. I don't know why this happened and I was very confused.
Grok
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Grok »

How about neither sexual fetish nor gender expression? I just like skirts.
pelmut
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by pelmut »

Brad wrote: Wed Dec 08, 2021 1:35 am ... and I was very confused.
The fact that it wasn't what you intended and you don't do it repeatedly for further sexual gratification is enough to rule out the possibilty of it being a fetish.
There is no such thing as a normal person, only someone you don't know very well yet.
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Sinned
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Re: Sexual Fetish or Gender Expression?

Post by Sinned »

The first time for anything can produce strange effects. I seem to remember that the first few times wearing a skirt was exciting but normalisation ( getting used to it ) reduces the effect. The feeling of nylon on the legs can be stimulating. Don't worry about it, it'll pass.
I believe in offering every assistance short of actual help but then mainly just want to be left to be myself in all my difference and uniqueness.
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