Coder wrote: ↑
Sun Feb 02, 2020 4:17 pm
I guess - I don’t know how to be assertive. I could watch some YouTube videos [...]
I rather doubt that one can get the needed advice from YouTube. This is the sort of thing that only comes with experience (i.e. "making enough mistakes so you learn from them") and personal security.
[... W]hat words does one use? I feel like “I want to” is kinda weak. But “I’m going to” feels too strong. A word like “need” is odd only that I really only need basic essentials (air, water, food, shelter)... everything else is just a perk.
"I want", is fine as it indicates interest and a drive to get somewhere. "I am going to" indicates intent and determination. Both work, but the latter means you're going to make good on the former, which in most things is laudable. As far as "need" goes, a decent starting-point is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
which reasonably cogently sets out what's needed to be a fully-functioning human being. He's a bit heavy on certain things, but it's a decent overall framework.
The important thing to remember is that all progress happens at the very periphery of our "comfort-zones". Being well inside is cosy and stable, but to actually achieve things means pushing boundaries, mostly those of experience, confidence, and intelligence -- and that can be distinctly un
comfortable. This is a fundamental part of being fully human.
Bluntly, the world isn't terribly sympathetic to wimps. We are informed that, "The meek shall inherit the Earth", but without the brave, the meek won't flourish. In this instance, bravery does not denote macho bravado, but rather the drive and desire to dare
to do new things and explore new spaces. Recall that better than a half-century ago men dared
to sit atop rockets and venture to the moon -- and we've been going full steam in reverse ever since.
To touch for a moment on steam, where would the world be today had James Watt (a perennial favourite of James Burke in his Connections
series, which I heartily recommend) never dared to harness the power of boiled water? Sure, we never would have had the Titanic
or the Sultana
, but then again, we wouldn't have had Great Eastern