Difficulties with partners

[Sinned]

To further this discussion I am reminded of a song from the 60's by Malvina Reynolds, called Little Boxes:

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky tacky,
Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses
All went to the university,
Where they were put in boxes
And they came out all the same,
And there's doctors and lawyers,
And business executives,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And they all play on the golf course
And drink their martinis dry,
And they all have pretty children
And the children go to school,
And the children go to summer camp
And then to the university,
Where they are put in boxes
And they come out all the same.

And the boys go into business
And marry and raise a family
In boxes made of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

Whereas we have all succumbed to this in the main through our educations and careers we have at least deviated to a greater or lesser extent in others and shown that we can think for ourselves.

[crfriend]

To further this discussion I am reminded of a song from the 60's by Malvina Reynolds, called Little Boxes:

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky tacky,
Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

Thanks for that memory. My ex-partner once used that to describe the way that I was breaking out of the mould I'd been confined in for so long, and the piece still resonates. Escaping the little box of ticky-tacky was a truly liberating experience, and I am profoundly glad I undertook it. I believe that everyone should, whether it be via clothing-choice or some other avenue. Modern societies (pick one) are altogether too much alike internally, and it's artificially alike -- forced, even -- and that's not healthy for the individual or, ultimately, the society.

[Caultron]

You have to be yourself because, like, who else could you be?

[Jim]

To further this discussion I am reminded of a song from the 60's by Malvina Reynolds, called Little Boxes:

We have a recording of Pete Seeger's version of the song. A favorite.

[skirted_in_SF]

Back in the early 60s, while driving my father to the San Francisco airport, we went by the houses the song was written about. They're still there to this day, though at SF Bay Area prices they would probably run you well north of $500k US.

[Gordon]

You have to be yourself because, like, who else could you be?

Someone else!? I've been someone else many times, trying to "fit in", be loved, liked, etc etc. Sad but true. I just didn't know any better til later in life, much much too late in life.

[hairy]

I don't think I've ever been one to fit in to any box. I've always been an individual who does my own thing maybe some might call me a rebel, and different to rest. I've always stood out in a crowd and don't know why so perhaps walking about skirted gives me the reason to stand out.

[crfriend]

You have to be yourself because, like, who else could you be?

There's a TV ad campaign on in the US at the moment that has a quote at the end attributed to Oscar Wilde: "Be yourself. Everybody else is taken." I'm not sure how factual the attribution is, but I like the sentiment anyway.

[Kirbstone]

Wilde was extraordinarily wise and had quite a way with words. Sad he lived at a time when his orientation earned him imprisonment.

I 'fit in' with MOH by not even mentioning my sartorial preferences.

Tom

[crfriend]

I 'fit in' with MOH by not even mentioning my sartorial preferences.

As I move on into the next, and, with luck, final phase of my life I have come to the conclusion that the modus operandus shall be, "No romantic entanglements." The risks are too high, the rewards too low, and the expense too great. 'Tis best to leave it to the younger and less experienced lads. I wish them luck.

I am fortunate that for a brief period I had not only the full acceptance by my then-partner regarding my sartorial style, but also her encouragement; for that I remain truly blessed, but it is now in the distant past and, whilst it can remain a fond memory, shall drift into the fog of memory with the passage of time. I'm not about to change much, if anything, now with my chosen style as it is an indelible part of me, but the liklihood is that I'll be in drab somewhat more often than I used to be in better times.

[Couya]

I too have lost my partner, who had never once queried my choice of kilts or skirts and was always ready to defend my choice verbally. But that has in no way made it likely that "I'll be in drab more often than I used to be." On the contrary, I have (for a year now) continued going about my life clothed as comfortably as in the previous 12 years. I did put a pair of trousers in my luggage to go to Quebec, just in case my hosts felt my unbifurcated style was ruining their reputation in the neighbourhood, but it was quite unnecessary.

I will agree with Carl that I won't be going out of my way to find "romantic entanglements."

Martin

[Sinned]

Martin, I like that. My main critic is the one who should be my most ardent defender and I shall raise that point with her in an opportune moment ( not that I think it will make any difference ). I would defend her to the hilt against any of her detractors for right or wrong. I now am who I am and, while I agree that when I married I had no thought of wearing skirts, I have discovered them for good or bad. She says that I have changed but then we both have - we are no longer the people we were and I think that she forgets that SHE has changed as well. I'm not giving up skirts now but I will work with her to weed out the ones she finds most objectionable and why. I think that she deliberately ignores the fact that anybody who matters has either seen me in a skirt or has been told that I wear one. My longer-term goal is to get that first outing with her whilst I am skirted but I am taking it bit by bit and certainly won't force the issue.

As for where we will be in 10 years time I would hope that men's skirts would be more accepted but would have to adapt to include larger pockets, belt loops and so on to match trousers. Whether the impetus will come from the younger set or subcultures is difficult to predict as a single unanticipated event can catch the public's imagination and change the course of fashion.

[skirted_in_SF]

As for where we will be in 10 years time I would hope that men's skirts would be more accepted but would have to adapt to include larger pockets, belt loops and so on to match trousers.

You don't have to wait 10 years, just head over to the Skirtcraft Kickstarter and sign up now. The goal has been reached, so they will be made and shipped.

[Gusto10]

Getting back to the topic, the reactions of ones partner.
As I have indicated in my introduction, actually it was in essence an idea of M(former)OH (= MFOH) as she would ahev easier access... I wasn't so sure, but gave it a try and that did get me hooked. In first instance mfoh indicated that she liked it and even indicated what I could and couldn't wear as our waits were approximatly equal. After I had been a week abroad, I was confronted with an angry wife. She had changed her thoughts on me wearing skirts and trying to talk it through was to no avail. Arguments as that iot's by origin a male garment, that it's better for the genitals and that she was wearing trousers and my shirts and socksswere of no importance. She filled for divorce, which became a long procedure. I attributed the change of heart to the medical treatment she had received a few months before. I'll spare you further (legal) details. Now I'm living just with a pet and wearing skirts when at home. I have with hindsight the feeling that she never intended to stay married but needed someone to sire her childeren. Whence those of you who have condoning or supportive wifes, count your blessings.

[Dottie]

I'm afraid the only difficulty I have with Mrs Dottie is that she borrows my stuff . I know I am so lucky. I feel so sorry for those of you whose partners disapprove.