Why don't men wear skirts?

[Barleymower]

Can you define true masculinity? Rather than what's toxic about it?

[Modoc]

There is nothing wrong with being considered feminine. It is a big step up from masculine. When I am considered feminine, it is a great compliment.

I like wearing skirts a lot. I agree that there is nothing wrong with being considered either feminine or masculine unless you don't want to be. As a matter of fact, that determination is made about people millions of times a day regardless of what they are wearing. People have their
comfort levels around being seen as feminine or masculine, and that is ok as long as each person respects another's preference without judging
I am sure that even when I wear pretty basic, non-frilly denim skirts and button-up striped shirts, someone will see that as feminine. I have accepted that there is nothing I can do about that, and besides, what another thinks is none of my concern unless they express it to me or take actions that are detrimental to me.
Don't get me wrong; I have worn somewhat flashy skirts as well and have the same attitude about what people may be thinking. I didn't come by that attitude overnight, but by consistently putting on a skirt and hitting the streets and realizing that, for the most part, nobody gives a darn, and if they do then ...so what. I am working on posting pictures to show some of the various arrangements I've come up with.
As has been expressed time and time again here the only way skirting is going to become more open is that we who want to have to wear them and others will join.
(tipping my hat)

[Grok]

As for members who dress a little more creatively, I can imagine kids being influenced by this. Then they will grow up and start pushing the envelope.

We always have high hopes for the children, but children are much more herd animals than adults and crave acceptance by their peers more than adults do. Thus, they are going to be constrained by what is "acceptable" -- and males in skirts just aren't that at the moment. So, there's no hope there. It's up to the adults in the environment.

I realize that I should have elaborated.

I don't expect children-when they are still in childhood-to make a difference. I was thinking that seeing men in skirted rigs might make a positive impression. And after those kids grow up, and remembering that impression, they might be bold enough to emulate that.

[Grok]

BTW, to create a positive impression we need to think about how our outfits are put together. As a vanguard of mavericks, we are beyond-ahead of-fashion. But we can think about how style can apply to a skirted rig.

[Barleymower]

BTW, to create a positive impression we need to think about how our outfits are put together. As a vanguard of mavericks, we are beyond-ahead of-fashion. But we can think about how style can apply to a skirted rig.

Grok it's easier said then done. Some here have many years of experience and are blessed with good taste. Some, I've noticed spend many hours poring over an outfit. They play close attention to coordinating a look and consider how it will be recieved.
At the other end of the scale, newbies need help and none is found or offered. When they present here they invariably recieve encouragement when perhaps realistic encouragement is needed.

(Edited to correct spelling)

[Faldaguy]

I think that the question is is a lot broader than men and skirts. Mature women who want to wear a short skirt are reluctant because they may be thought of as "mutton dressed as lamb" (a term that can not be applied to uncastrated males). If people can stop worrying about what other's think, mainly strangers, then they will feel true liberation and dress as they please. Family and friends usually understand or are in a position to ask a question in an endeavour to understand. The really difficult situation remaining is when a partner of other loved person is disturbed by one's behaviour and one does care what they think.
Waiting for general acceptance is going to take too long and anyway acceptance usually comes after frequent exposure to something ........ so get out there and show off those skirts ........... and cheerful floral patterns too. If you are in a civilised country you won't be abused or harmed.

I would generally class Ireland as civilized but there are still attitudes around that would indicate that it is not as civilized as I would hope...

https://m.independent.ie/regionals/lout ... 00567.html

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source= ... GXA94nkICL

https://www.thepinknews.com/2023/05/19/ ... sts-navan/

Yes, these have elements of homophobia, some xenophobia too.we all know that skirt wearing doesn't mean anything related to sexuality, but I would prefer my family not to be exposed to or subjected to verbal abuse because of me. Or, as discussed in a different thread, snide behind the back gossip which permeates through the country. Especially in small town rural Ireland.

Edit
And yes, it is a cowardly cop out given what others have been subjected to in terms of forwarding a cause. If I was single or in a place where I wasn't known I probably would venture out, if I was in a civilized county! But at present it is a private venture for me and that is unfortunately how it will stay

Hola Dressedbrewer;

Some of us have found that being in a small town is actually an advantage. Many, if not most of the people in your community have seen and know you in "conventional" clothes and activities for perhaps years. As such, you are known for who you are, not how you appear -- and that is an advantage. It will even open the door more readily to conversations about your choices and changes, which is great.
If you focus on finding the "exceptions and the bad elements (like the media is prone to do) -- and not put those into perspective, fear will run your life. There are a few accidents in a city daily -- BUT, there are millions of miles with thousands of drivers that are accident free. You need to keep a perspective balance.
I would encourage you to go back and review some of the history in the archives here --- many many men had the same initial fears; and when they stopped letting their lives be rules by fear of what others might thing or do, they found it was a much better world than they feared! I like the comment: "You've nothing to lose but your inhibitions."!

[Grok]

To explain where we (or, rather, mainstream society) are in terms of MIS, consider combining two metaphors.

1. In terms of options, the other side of the aisle can be compared to a diverse, lush, luxurious, garden, brilliant with colorful flowers.

2. Mens' options in terms of clothing? Think of a dirt lot. There are tufts of brown grass, with a few scraggly weeds.

The other metaphor-we have a very steep hill to climb to advance MIS.

Combining metaphors-think of a steep, tall hill that has been terraced. At the top is the ideal of MIS, represented by a diverse, lush, luxurious garden, brilliant with color. At the bottom is that dirt lot, which is where many members are starting from in their climb.

From my point of view (as an American) the first terrace is relatively low, and the slope is not particularly steep. This is the kilting terrace.

The next milestone is the next terrace up, with a steeper and taller slope to ascend.

[STEVIE]

When they present here they invariably recieve encouragement when perhaps realistic encouragement is needed.

Hi BM,
Can I ask that you expand a bit on the "realistic" part please?
My own descriptors have been labelled as quite negative to the point of hostility in the past so I won't reiterate.
As for good taste and the time one can spend putting a particular look together, that is down to circumstance and disposable income.
My wardrobe would look very different if money was no object, but would I be happier?
Steve.

[dressedbrewer]

I think that the question is is a lot broader than men and skirts. Mature women who want to wear a short skirt are reluctant because they may be thought of as "mutton dressed as lamb" (a term that can not be applied to uncastrated males). If people can stop worrying about what other's think, mainly strangers, then they will feel true liberation and dress as they please. Family and friends usually understand or are in a position to ask a question in an endeavour to understand. The really difficult situation remaining is when a partner of other loved person is disturbed by one's behaviour and one does care what they think.
Waiting for general acceptance is going to take too long and anyway acceptance usually comes after frequent exposure to something ........ so get out there and show off those skirts ........... and cheerful floral patterns too. If you are in a civilised country you won't be abused or harmed.

I would generally class Ireland as civilized but there are still attitudes around that would indicate that it is not as civilized as I would hope...

https://m.independent.ie/regionals/lout ... 00567.html

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source= ... GXA94nkICL

https://www.thepinknews.com/2023/05/19/ ... sts-navan/

Yes, these have elements of homophobia, some xenophobia too.we all know that skirt wearing doesn't mean anything related to sexuality, but I would prefer my family not to be exposed to or subjected to verbal abuse because of me. Or, as discussed in a different thread, snide behind the back gossip which permeates through the country. Especially in small town rural Ireland.

Edit
And yes, it is a cowardly cop out given what others have been subjected to in terms of forwarding a cause. If I was single or in a place where I wasn't known I probably would venture out, if I was in a civilized county! But at present it is a private venture for me and that is unfortunately how it will stay

Hola Dressedbrewer;

Some of us have found that being in a small town is actually an advantage. Many, if not most of the people in your community have seen and know you in "conventional" clothes and activities for perhaps years. As such, you are known for who you are, not how you appear -- and that is an advantage. It will even open the door more readily to conversations about your choices and changes, which is great.
If you focus on finding the "exceptions and the bad elements (like the media is prone to do) -- and not put those into perspective, fear will run your life. There are a few accidents in a city daily -- BUT, there are millions of miles with thousands of drivers that are accident free. You need to keep a perspective balance.
I would encourage you to go back and review some of the history in the archives here --- many many men had the same initial fears; and when they stopped letting their lives be rules by fear of what others might thing or do, they found it was a much better world than they feared! I like the comment: "You've nothing to lose but your inhibitions."!

Yes, many people here have had positive experiences and huge kudos to those who have taken that first step and taken on the world. I am lucky enough to have a supportive spouse who doesn't question what I wear in private but going outside in clothing from the female side of the aisle is not something I can do at this point.

[jamodu]

Today, I searched Google: ‘Why don’t Women like wearing Skirts’.

There was no shortage of reading material on the subject.

It’s enlightening reading - and the opposite of why we, here, actually like wearing Skirts.

[Barleymower]

When they present here they invariably recieve encouragement when perhaps realistic encouragement is needed.

Hi BM,
Can I ask that you expand a bit on the "realistic" part please?
My own descriptors have been labelled as quite negative to the point of hostility in the past so I won't reiterate.
As for good taste and the time one can spend putting a particular look together, that is down to circumstance and disposable income.
My wardrobe would look very different if money was no object, but would I be happier?
Steve.

Hi Stevie, skirts on the rail are not designed for men shapes, they are not designed for men tastes, they are designed for women's shapes and tastes. Luckily for us, men's tastes and women's tastes often co-inside. There is every possible shape, fabric and style out there already in women's skirts. So, a man with a taste for something finer will find something he likes.

When it comes to shape. Men's waists are lower than women's who have hips to hang their skirts from. This can also be easily fixed, as again skirts come in all lengths, flare and waist size. A man will find something that fits and with a little help from a good tailor can make a skirt fit perfectly.

The problem comes in the advice section. Skirt wearing men will not get much support from other men if they ask: "how do I look?". They may (but mostly will not) get much advice from women, who for various valid reasons will blank him. What's a man to do? He turns to the skirt cafe and presents his skirted look to a group of men who appreciate such things.

The guys/women of the Cafe would not want to discourage any man from wearing a skirt so when someone plucks up the courage to present themselves, they are invariably greeted with lots of positive comments. "you look great" and "love the outfit". Truth is though (and I include myself in this category) we are in dire need of someone guiding us and telling us some hard to hear criticism. Nobody wants to do that though. A man comes out of the shadows and quite rightly is feeling sensitive and nervous. It would not take much to send him back to the closet, never to be seen again. Even this message might be enough to discourage some guys.

Maybe a kilt is the answer. I don't think it is. Its an easy garment to gain acceptance from the crowd. However, a kilt (or more accurately, tartan skirt) is a very narrow band in which to exist. It epitomises the very thing we are fighting against.

I think we need to accept that fashion mistakes are made and we need to encourage men no matter what they choose to put on. Who are we to judge anyway?

[rode_kater]

Some of us have found that being in a small town is actually an advantage. Many, if not most of the people in your community have seen and know you in "conventional" clothes and activities for perhaps years. As such, you are known for who you are, not how you appear -- and that is an advantage. It will even open the door more readily to conversations about your choices and changes, which is great.

And on the other side you have what I'm calling "big city blinders". At some population density you really can't pay attention to everything around you that's slightly unusual or you'll get neck strain. So you get a kind of filter that unless it's directly related to what you're doing you just don't see it. I might be paying attention to what other people are wearing, but most people are just dealing with their own problems.

I'm thinking issues are more likely in places that are too large that people don't directly know each other, but not diverse enough that people are actually notice things out of the ordinary.

[Modoc]

Today, I searched Google: ‘Why don’t Women like wearing Skirts’.

There was no shortage of reading material on the subject.

It’s enlightening reading - and the opposite of why we, here, actually like wearing Skirts.

Hi Jamodu.
I followed your lead and googled the same question. My female partner almost never wears skirts or dresses because she doesn't like the way she looks in them. I suggest it sometimes and always compliment the way she looks when she does but that does little to help overcome the way she sees herself in a skirt or a dress and I know when to leave well enough alone.

[STEVIE]

The question of women not wearing skirts is irrelevant in this context.
A woman can choose what she wants to wear for whatever reason with very little fear of being judged for that choice.
Not so long ago, she would not have had that luxury whether she liked how she looked or not.
Many women would simply have never considered wearing trousers.
As it is with men and skirts now, guys know very well that they will be judged by society and found wanting.
I still think that there are many more men who wear skirts in secret than we will ever realise and they are the ones we really need to reach out to.
They have the potential to affect change.
Steve.

[new2skirts]

When they present here they invariably recieve encouragement when perhaps realistic encouragement is needed.

Hi BM,
Can I ask that you expand a bit on the "realistic" part please?
My own descriptors have been labelled as quite negative to the point of hostility in the past so I won't reiterate.
As for good taste and the time one can spend putting a particular look together, that is down to circumstance and disposable income.
My wardrobe would look very different if money was no object, but would I be happier?
Steve.

Hi Stevie, skirts on the rail are not designed for men shapes, they are not designed for men tastes, they are designed for women's shapes and tastes. Luckily for us, men's tastes and women's tastes often co-inside. There is every possible shape, fabric and style out there already in women's skirts. So, a man with a taste for something finer will find something he likes.

When it comes to shape. Men's waists are lower than women's who have hips to hang their skirts from. This can also be easily fixed, as again skirts come in all lengths, flare and waist size. A man will find something that fits and with a little help from a good tailor can make a skirt fit perfectly.

The problem comes in the advice section. Skirt wearing men will not get much support from other men if they ask: "how do I look?". They may (but mostly will not) get much advice from women, who for various valid reasons will blank him. What's a man to do? He turns to the skirt cafe and presents his skirted look to a group of men who appreciate such things.

The guys/women of the Cafe would not want to discourage any man from wearing a skirt so when someone plucks up the courage to present themselves, they are invariably greeted with lots of positive comments. "you look great" and "love the outfit". Truth is though (and I include myself in this category) we are in dire need of someone guiding us and telling us some hard to hear criticism. Nobody wants to do that though. A man comes out of the shadows and quite rightly is feeling sensitive and nervous. It would not take much to send him back to the closet, never to be seen again. Even this message might be enough to discourage some guys.

Maybe a kilt is the answer. I don't think it is. Its an easy garment to gain acceptance from the crowd. However, a kilt (or more accurately, tartan skirt) is a very narrow band in which to exist. It epitomises the very thing we are fighting against.

I think we need to accept that fashion mistakes are made and we need to encourage men no matter what they choose to put on. Who are we to judge anyway?

For most men it's a real statement even to wear trousers that are out of the usual colour range of others, let alone a skirt... but gradually we're seeing change. Saw a man in a black pencil skirt walking down the High Street, you see the occasional jeans skirt or utility kilt in the summer months. Little to no reaction from most. There are a lot from the Middle East and other climes who wear robes so perhaps more of a non event around here. But there are loads of skirted men on other platforms, Instagram, Reddit, some do over the top with poses etc., but some will happily film their trip to the shops whilst skirted... there's more out there than we realize, but may have never heard of this forum. They may feel it's just easy to post a picture than discuss other topics...

I think Mark Bryan, Coder, SkirtsDad, Skirtyscot, JeffB have posted some ideal looks for guys who are unsure what to team their skirt with