The Voice of Fashion: Why Men Don’t Take So Easily to Skirts

[ScotL]

Yes, in general we male don't often wear things for fun. Usually we are stuck in...drab stuff.

Makes you crazy to think that right? Women do generally enjoy their clothes. I mean not all. There’s a lotta complaining about high heels and bras and the like but they seem to also really enjoy other stuff.

We should really take a page from their playbook

[mishawakaskirt]

I am rather irritated that every time somebody mentions skirts for men, the trans and LGBT lobbies are brought up as though there is some connection. Every time a man in a skirt is associated with these, men and boys who are not gay or trans will be deterred from trying a skirt.

MIS is, in my view, is a men's rights issue - not a trans rights or gay rights issue.

You don't have to be trans to wear skirts, just gender nonconforming.

Stu, that was my thoughts exactly, adding the gay, trans, pride element will kill a potentially open minded male from trying a skirt possibly. Articles like that ultimately hurt mis more than help.

I don't want to be perceived as being any of the above.
I drastically cut back on my public skirt wearing during June just so I'm less likely to be seen as coming out.

Jamie001, show me a gender non-conforming woman.
Ok yes they do exist, but a vast majority are not even noticed. They are just seen as women with short hair and in blue jeans. Tattoos, flannel shirts, etc, add what ever else you want, they are still seen as women.

I have mentioned this someplace else in another thread here at the Cafe
There is a woman "Jane" (Name changed to protect the innocent) in our church that has short hair, always wears jeans, doesn't, wear makeup, don't carry a purse.
I think I have only seen her in a dress two times in the last 12 years. Even on mother's day and Easter she is usually sporting Jeans.
To everyone she's just "Jane" nothing controversial. She isn't remotely considered gender non conforming.

"Jane" just likes jeans and short hair.

As a MIS I/we want the same courtesy
To just be, Tom, Dick, Harry, Fred, Sam, James, Joe, Allen.
Sometimes he prefers to wear a skirt.
just like "Jane" she prefers wearing jeans.

Just a additional little side light tonight.
My wife is wearing dark blue jeans and a camouflage tee shirt. ....
At least one of us is dressing the way they totally want to.

I guess I shouldn't totally complain, at least I'm wearing my shortalls that I mentioned in another thread as being my #2 favorite item, second to skirts. What's funny is the shortalls are starting to become my identity.
I had a friend of mine comment that he saw someone in Red white and blue patriotic bib cover alls, and instantly thought of me.

What's funnier I have been contemplating / debating, tie dyeing a pair of my white shortalls red white and blue. I just haven't had the time to round up the necessary supplies to do it. Now it's almost like I have to do it so I don't disappoint.

[phathack]

Strangely Im a CIS male that likes to wear Skits, The newest skirts Im wearing have lace and embroidered accents because I'm a fashion outlaw.

[ScotL]

Stu, that was my thoughts exactly, adding the gay, trans, pride element will kill a potentially open minded male from trying a skirt possibly. Articles like that ultimately hurt mis more than help.

In my opinion, our biggest problem is people don’t realize there are other reasons for men to wear skirts. The comfort/fashion or the newest one a member discussed just for fun are unknown

Because they don’t realize this, there are only three reasons for a man to wear a skirt.

To use an analogy (forgive me for assuming all traffic lights of the world only use red, yellow and green), if someone needed to repair a traffic light, what colors would they select for lighting? Although I like to believe I see the color orange and even pink sometimes as I scoot through an intersection, if I was given a test to name the colors of a traffic light, red/yellow/green are it.

[moonshadow]

There is a woman "Jane" (Name changed to protect the innocent) in our church that has short hair, always wears jeans, doesn't, wear makeup, don't carry a purse.
I think I have only seen her in a dress two times in the last 12 years. Even on mother's day and Easter she is usually sporting Jeans.
To everyone she's just "Jane" nothing controversial. She isn't remotely considered gender non conforming.

"Jane" just likes jeans and short hair

Ah, but you see, that is the key here... she may or may not consider herself "nonconforming" in the social-political aspect of it, but nevertheless, she got your attention. There is something.... different.. about her, she doesnt conform to traditional gender roles for her sex.

Your very comment proves this, if she was just another "run of the mill" woman, no comment would have been made.

Now, the magic lies in how she perceives herself; does she take stock of her chosen expression and contemplate on its meaning in society, or does she just "be who she is" and let the world assume what it will?

It sounds like me she has chosen the latter. There may be strangers that see her and assume she is some kind of enby, or trans-man, etc, but does she care?

If not then I'd argue we all could learn a thing or two from her.

The free mind has the ability to tune out the noise.

[jamie001]

Most don’t know of the fourth that we do here, that some men wear for comfort/fashion.

The fifth reason...The novelty! Trying skirts as an adult. Trying a garment that is fundamentally different from what you have worn before.

Excellent point! Guess I thought if that as the fashion aspect but I like your view better. Wearing just for fun. What an oddly amazing concept.

Men need to get over being associated with labels. So What if ignorant people think you are trans or gay? It doesn't matter one iota.

[jamie001]

Yes, in general we male don't often wear things for fun. Usually we are stuck in...drab stuff.

Men are stuck there because they choose to be stuck. There is no law that prevents them from wearing skirts and other garments.

[jamie001]

There is a woman "Jane" (Name changed to protect the innocent) in our church that has short hair, always wears jeans, doesn't, wear makeup, don't carry a purse.
I think I have only seen her in a dress two times in the last 12 years. Even on mother's day and Easter she is usually sporting Jeans.
To everyone she's just "Jane" nothing controversial. She isn't remotely considered gender non conforming.

"Jane" just likes jeans and short hair

Ah, but you see, that is the key here... she may or may not consider herself "nonconforming" in the social-political aspect of it, but nevertheless, she got your attention. There is something.... different.. about her, she doesnt conform to traditional gender roles for her sex.

Your very comment proves this, if she was just another "run of the mill" woman, no comment would have been made.

Now, the magic lies in how she perceives herself; does she take stock of her chosen expression and contemplate on its meaning in society, or does she just "be who she is" and let the world assume what it will?

It sounds like me she has chosen the latter. There may be strangers that see her and assume she is some kind of enby, or trans-man, etc, but does she care?

If not then I'd argue we all could learn a thing or two from her.

The free mind has the ability to tune out the noise.

Thank you Moon!

You have stated my point much more eloquently that I could ever state it! I wish the there was some way that the moderators could frame this post and pin it so that every time folks log on to the cafe, they will see it. It should be mandatory reading at least once a week for everyone here that is dealing with issues regarding wearing skirts and other feminine items.

[crfriend]

So What if ignorant people think you are trans or gay? It doesn't matter one iota.

In an ideal world it wouldn't matter one whit. The challenge, therefore, is to "Show me an ideal world." Because I'd posit that the one we live in isn't even close.

[jamie001]

So What if ignorant people think you are trans or gay? It doesn't matter one iota.

In an ideal world it wouldn't matter one whit. The challenge, therefore, is to "Show me an ideal world." Because I'd posit that the one we live in isn't even close.

The issue is that men are herd animals and most of them are devastated and paranoid if they are deviating from the herd mindset. Can you imagine the horror of no longer being about to drink with macho dudes because you deviate from the herd by wearing a skirt? Women have always had the mindset that it is ok to deviate from the herd.

Two Ph.D psychologists told me years ago that the clothing that I wear is not the problem. I am perfectly fine as I am. Other folks have the problem and that since I cannot control other people's thought processes, it is not my problem. I should not live my life to please them.

[Spirou003]

Men need to get over being associated with labels. So What if ignorant people think you are trans or gay? It doesn't matter one iota.

It matters because:
- If I'm chatting with a woman that I want to become my girlfriend, there is no chance for the latter to happen if she thinks I'm trans or gay
- I have been that ignorant person some time ago who would have labelled most of us in that box, whereas I was/am what society can consider a smart and open minded man
- My best (girl) friend, who was initially against the idea of walking with me when I wear a skirt, did change of mind. If I have met her in a skirt the first time, I would have lost a great friend

[crfriend]

Two Ph.D psychologists told me years ago that the clothing that I wear is not the problem. I am perfectly fine as I am. Other folks have the problem and that since I cannot control other people's thought processes, it is not my problem. I should not live my life to please them.

All well and good, but the problem arises when the idiots transfer their problem and make it yours in a different form. And, in response to that, sometimes a response is required.

[BouffantBelle]

- If I'm chatting with a woman that I want to become my girlfriend, there is no chance for the latter to happen if she thinks I'm trans or gay

There's definitely no chance for that to happen if she thinks her friends will think you're trans or gay.

It all comes down to tribalism. Go against the tribe, there will be consequences.

[jamie001]

- If I'm chatting with a woman that I want to become my girlfriend, there is no chance for the latter to happen if she thinks I'm trans or gay

There's definitely no chance for that to happen if she thinks her friends will think you're trans or gay.

It all comes down to tribalism. Go against the tribe, there will be consequences.

There is another way to look at this:

If she reacts negatively to your skirt wearing even after you explain the double standard regarding male/female fashion, you do not want her in your life anyway! You want people that accept you for who you are, not who you pretend to be! Pretending is not living a genuine life.

As someone here has said many times: "The people that matter don't mind, and the people that mind, don't matter."

[BouffantBelle]

There is another way to look at this:

If she reacts negatively to your skirt wearing even after you explain the double standard regarding male/female fashion, you do not want her in your life anyway! You want people that accept you for who you are, not who you pretend to be! Pretending is not living a genuine life.

As someone here has said many times: "The people that matter don't mind, and the people that mind, don't matter."

This is true. But who does live a genuine life?

People attempt to eradicate, or at least surpress what they believe to be their undesirable aspects and traits in order to be better accepted by others all the time.

Like I said, tribalism. And unfortunately, human beings are hardwired to seek acceptance. It takes incredible strength to deny that instinct and decimate your prospects as a result.