Can men in skirts look sexy? Is this allowed?

[Peter v]

At this moment I wear real mens skirts, but also denim skirts for women.

Why isn't it possible for men to look sexy and attractive ?

Greetings from RokSterNL

Hallo RokSterNL, It IS possible to look good (sexy) and attractive in skirts. It depends much on you total image. Women with legs proportioned the same as muscular men, don't look particularly attractive. Men who have a finer body build, than the more normal muscular build, can more easily be sexy ( not in the sense of looking like women, but looking good. ) Unless you are portraying the muscular build, it makes it more difficult to get that pleasant body line, that women have. When you have a big flabby belly, male or female, there's not much that looks good on you. Things like hairy arms impede the look, on both women and men, unless again you are deliberately going for that rugged manly look.

When wearing skirts, unless going for the rugged outdoor look, the way your legs look in conjunction to the rest is of great importance. Get the look of skirt, legs, shoes right, and you're half way home. To keep the "body line" flowing, careful selection of the top body half clothing is essential. As we are men, we have to learn that, so in the beginning we generally do things wrong. But after a while, with a not too overly muscular body impeding the look, we can look very sexy. And I don't mean attractive to men either

We men are biased, as we think nearly every woman is interesting, but if we look well, we can see how it works with women, the same way as it works with men. Not all women have great bodys, and not all women get it right all the time or even want to be correctly dressed all the time. Like wearing a training suit, does not mean she doesn't have any good taste. Every body can take a deliberate break from being correctly and successfully dressed.

Having correct men's wear tailored fitting shirts, jumpers and jackets for men looks very much smarter than the straight miles too big confection clothing we normally wear. Unfortunaltely that is probably very expensive, whereas women's wear is that way standard, That is one of the reasons that women's clothing most often looks good. And when men find the inexpensive women's clothing that suits and fits them, then it becomes good fitting MEN'S clothing.

People irregardless of sex look "sexy" when well dressed.

Peter v.

[Peter v]

To crfriend
Member Extraordinaire
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 6:10 am Post subject: Perceptions

That's precicely what I think and say.

There's only one way to go, and that is actually the way YOU really are, the rest of the time you are not, you are living a lie. Sometimes we need to camouflage our real selves for practical reasons, but for the rest, waiting is NO option. Only being yourself now, now that you are living, is the only true way to go. (change back to your camou suit and dissappear out of direct sight only when neccessary).

It's of no shame for those who are not able to muster enough courage to do it, but it is time being your true self lost forever.

Peter v.

[Since1982]

My answer is: Sure, as long as the man looks sexy in a masculine way. Otherwise, he's crossed over into another look completely. Not that either way is wrong or bad, choices are personal.

[jonyhon]

As far as the question of whether men SHOULD look sexy in skirts -- Um, is this a trick question? I know you can't possibly be asking for permission to feel sexy, or to impress a lady, or to flirt... You can't mean that you perhaps sometimes think to yourself that you see someone you fancy and so you quick as a flash run home and change into a pair of Levi's so that you can then be ALLOWED to go chat her up, impress her with your wit, deep voice, husky laugh and be sexy? Come on, I'm just really cnofuesd!

I've never been cnofuesd. Is it fun?

But about my comment, I just meant - 'should we' - as in the sense - is it permissible, does it break any unwritten rules that no-one has told me about?

In times gone by men used to dress very elaborately. I'm thinking of the 1500's and later. They wore embroidered stockings, had silk flowers on their shoes, wore skirts that barely covered their bum and wore a 'cod piece' to cover their best bits. I can't give more detail here as I would have to hunt out reference books - but my point is that men used to dress elaborately - presumably to look good to the other sex.

But these days, men are often dressed in the Victorian style drabness of a black suit for work and jeans etc. for leisure. I see both of those outfits as being basically asexual - i.e. they suppress the sexuality of the man.

I'm getting a bit lost here - so I hope I'm making sense. basically I am wondering why these days men seem to dress down in respect of their sexuality - to minimise it - while women often dress to emphasise it. There seems to be unwritten social rules that control this. It never used to be like this.

Well sometimes its upon on their perception..


________________
Silk plants

[Since1982]

Anyone, that would like a good look at how men have dressed since Cavemen wore animal skins to the 1950's have one great volume to look in. Unfortunately the only place you can see it without buying a complete set is at the library. The set is "World Book Encyclopedia" and the book I speak of is volume D...go to Dr> Dress. There are 20+ pages of the history of dress, the kinds of dress, men's dress, women's dress, children's dress. Dress of various countries, Dress of different groups, Biblical dress. It was my bible all thru my youth, it was the book that convinced me that MEN could wear unbifurcated clothing without being ostrasized. I knew more about the history of dress in the South Pacific long before I ever visited there. It was part of the reason I took that job. I couldn't wait to be on an island full of masculine men (Tonga) who wore skirts on a daily basis without ever thinking about whether it was right or not, it was just "normal".

tupenu.gif

[Brad]

When I wear a skirt, women act more like men. They get bold, whistle, and one even pinched my butt. I think a man in a skirt empowers women. Men in skirts are definately sexy.

[JRMILLER]

Brad,
Hmm, I think to these women, a "guy in a skirt" represents someone who is now "second class" the same as many men view women. Thus, donning the skirt demotes you to second class and these women now have someone to kick around. Doesn't sound like they are responding to your male virtues in any way, shape or form.

Just a thought....

[Since1982]

::::::::::Agrees with John::::::::::: I certainly wouldn't patronize any woman that acted like that towards me. She'd find out right away she was not making any friends here.

[Emerald Witch]

When I wear a skirt, women act more like men. They get bold, whistle, and one even pinched my butt. I think a man in a skirt empowers women. Men in skirts are definately sexy.

I do think men in skirts are sexy. When I see one, I always notice and want to somehow strike up a conversation with him. I imagine any man with the stones to wear a skirt must be a fine, confident man who isn't bound by conventional rules.

In that sense, maybe seeing a skirt does make me "bolder" than plain old jeans.

Sometimes when I see a man who looks particularly fine I do want to whistle at him, just to show appreciation. Generally I get those urges when I see someone with a beautifully sculpted body jogging along in nothing but shorts. They are beautiful to watch, and it's obvious they're taking pride in their body. However, I can't whistle, so this never actually happens. Even so, I don't think I'd whistle at a man just because he was in a skirt. I would think it was rude. Heck, I think it's probably rude to whistle at the jogger, too, but unless the man in the skirt looked FINE, and we were at a dance club or something, I just wouldn't whistle (even if I could).

Invasive touching, however, cannot be construed as anything but sexual harassment. Well, okay, maybe if you're at one of those kinky sort of parties where everyone is allowed to sample whatever they see and like, then maybe it would be a sort of compliment, but I'm not guessing that's where this happened.

The only possible caveat I could give would be if maybe after the incident the woman held your gaze for a long time and tried to actually talk with you. Maybe she is just so cloddishly clueless that she has no idea how to break the ice, so she falls back on idiotic stuff she knows men have done. Even so, I doubt many guys would want to spend much time with such a clod.

Or am I completely wrong here? Do guys appreciate it when women get agressively suggestive? If so, is anything going through their minds besides something quick and casual enough to be nameless?

[Brad]

Emerald Witch wrote-
The only possible caveat I could give would be if maybe after the incident the woman held your gaze for a long time and tried to actually talk with you. Maybe she is just so cloddishly clueless that she has no idea how to break the ice, so she falls back on idiotic stuff she knows men have done. Even so, I doubt many guys would want to spend much time with such a clod.

Or am I completely wrong here? Do guys appreciate it when women get agressively suggestive? If so, is anything going through their minds besides something quick and casual enough to be nameless?

I like women who are agressive and take the initiative. It tells me that they are taking a risk of being rejected and making a worthwhile effort. It also tells me that they are interested and saves me the trouble of guessing. I want women to make the moves all of the time, and the ones I meet usually do.

But if all a woman can do is make stupid comments, giggle, and whistle, she shows me no originality and risk taking, and I'm not interested beyond the initial flattery.

By the way, the butt pincher should have been arrested. She rode by on a bicycle as she did it and got away quick. That was scary. I heard the bike coming up behind me, but didn't want to show fear or look back. Of course, had I been able to involve the police, I don't know how they would react to a guy in a skirt making a complaint.

[TomH]

Wow, good to see you had a few moments to have a conversation, EW. I agree with you and think you are on track as usual. Good to hear from you.

TomH

[Uncle Al]

E.W.---Just read your post. Excellent reading you again.
Welcome back!----We've missed you!

Uncle Al
Duncanville, TX

[Since1982]

Or am I completely wrong here? Do guys appreciate it when women get agressively suggestive?

Personally, I don't appreciate agressive women at all. I had one that lived with me for 9 years and all she wanted to do was somehow make me a possession, not a life partner as I wanted.

[Emerald Witch]

Thanks for the welcome back, guys!

I'd really love to get into some questions exploring more about the topic of women taking the initiative, but I'm afraid that isn't what this thread is about. I think I'll start a new one. I'm dying to hear what all you gentlemen think.

[AMM]

When I wear a skirt, women act more like men. They get bold, whistle, and one even pinched my butt. I think a man in a skirt empowers women. Men in skirts are definately sexy.

Invasive touching ... cannot be construed as anything but sexual harassment....

... Maybe she is just so cloddishly clueless that she has no idea how to break the ice, so she falls back on idiotic stuff she knows men have done. Even so, I doubt many guys would want to spend much time with such a clod.

I've occasionally had women do things that could be seen as "invasive." Once, a woman tried to tug my skirt off. I've also had women pull the hem up to look at it. When it first happens, I'm usually just plain nonplussed. I have no idea what to do and end up using my default (and usually counter-productive) behavior, which is to push people away. It's only later that I realize that she might not have been trying to humiliate me, she maybe just wanted to get to know me better, and that I've just blown what might have been an interesting opportunity.

As far as I can figure out, there are several things going on. For one thing, women tend to act more "intimate" with one another than they would with a man --- I have the impression that most women wouldn't feel assaulted if another woman wanted a look at her petticoat. A man wearing a skirt may elicit the same sort of behavior -- a sort of "honorary woman" status.

For another, I think that women are as likely to have an urge to be "aggressive" towards a man as vice versa, to the extent that they can get past the usual social training (and the fear of rape.) But they don't have a lot of role models or experience with acting it out, and most men don't have much experience handling it when it happens, so you get a lot of awkward situations.

Also, I get the impression that it's pretty common for men to do this sort of thing to women. I wouldn't be surprised if many of the women who lift men's kilts and skirts, and whistle at and pinch butts of men in "unbifurcated" have not only had this done to them, but also been told over and over that they should take it as a compliment. Maybe there's an element of revenge, or maybe they're just applying the lesson that this is how you tell someone you think they look sexy.

In any case, I think people should really give other people a break. I've been dismayed at how judgemental many of the patrons of the Cafe become when they hear of a woman making a comment or pinching a butt or doing something "inappropriate." Has no one here ever found themselves expressing their feeling of attraction in an off-putting way? Has no one ever acted a bit "cloddish"? If so, does it help you to have people condemn you and dismiss you as a hopeless jerk?

I wish we would spend less time putting down other people for their Incorrect Behavior(tm) and spend a little more time figuring out how we could respond to their behavior in a way that would help them be a little less "cloddish" next time.

Or am I completely wrong here? Do guys appreciate it when women get agressively suggestive? If so, is anything going through their minds besides something quick and casual enough to be nameless?

I like the idea of women being "aggressively suggestive," perhaps because I'm used to the sort of heavy flirting which is the norm when Contra Dancing. If you're looking for a quick no-strings-attached ego boost (or a no-strings-attached roll in the hay, for that matter), it's great. The down side comes when you start to wonder if there's going to be more than just a quick comment or butt pinch or whatever -- if you get to that point, it's going to be emotionally complicated whatever way it goes. (Cf. Fear of Flying.)