"Comebacks" for remarks made at your Unbifurcated

[Sinned]

Yes, Charlie, I like that reply. Mind you, it might have given him a cerebral hernia using something that he hasn't used for a long while, if ever.

[Fred in Skirts]

Since I started to wear skirts in public I have had no bad comments. I ran into a former co-worker at the drug store and she did ask why and I said they are just so comfortable and I really enjoyed wearing them she agreed with me. But that has been it. Maybe I have been lucky I don't know.

Fred

[moonshadow]

"Men don't wear skirts"

Another possible response: "I'm going to need you to cite a source on that".

Or:

"You mean you have personally queried each and every three point five billion men in the world, and you can say with absolute certainty that up until this day, you have yet to meet one single man who wears skirts?"

"Well uh... well, REAL men don't wear skirts!"

"OH well, that explains it! Hold on... move over everyone, we have an authority on what defines a REAL MAN over here! I feel so absolutely privileged to be in the present company of someone who sets standards by which the entire world population must abide! Behold as the alpha pheromones RADIATE about you, as women swoon! You, oh enlightened male figure, who so BOLDY follows the lead of the masses in your fashion choices... oh but not because you're a "follower" oh no... that's beneath you.. In fact, I should have known all along that YOU and YOU alone are the sole authority that decideth that all man shall wear bifurcated garnets! WOW to be in the pretense of such power! REAL MAN you say? Thank you so very much for enlightening me in my journey of life, and answering one of my most vexing questions of why women tend to live longer than men.... because when one women jumps off the bridge, the rest typically think she's crazy... but REAL MEN? Well.... that's a different matter all together.... "

Yes I really talk like this in real life.

No I don't have a lot of friends! I've got Long Island sarcasm in my blood line.

italics: There's a hidden message in that line.

[moonshadow]

Taken from another post on another forum.... a simple, stellar answer:

"I am amazed by the comfy."

I love it!

[JeffB1959]

I've never had anyone tell me that men don't wear skirts or ask why I wear them. I'd have some nice responses for them if that were to happen.

[Caultron]

Are you Scottish?

• No, but I visited there once.
  No, but I drank some once.
  No, they rejected my application because I was dressed funny.
  No, just nuts.

Why are you wearing a skirt (or kilt)?

• It's comfortable.
  I don't want to get arrested.
  Outstanding freedom of movement, excellent ventilation, no chaffing...
  I've been wearing pants my whole life and just got tired of it.
  I was meditating one day and suddenly realized nobody in the Bible ever wore pants.
  Residual teenage rebellion.
  Ever since Woodstock, man.
  One good thing about being an old man is that you get to be a crazy old man.
  It makes people ask.
  Just nuts.

Do you play the bagpipes?

• No, that's not a requirement.
  No, but I used to have a CD.
  No, I couldn't decide paper or plastic.
  No, but I replaced a sink trap once.

And after that, always tell them it's great and they should try it.

[denimini]

Yes, it is good fun thinking up potential comebacks. Sort of ask a silly question ............

Are you Scottish?

• Wha-hoo-da-noo (or something unintelligible)
  No. Are you from Kyrgyzstan?

Why are you wearing a skirt (or kilt)?

• I'm from Barcelona (atrib. John Cleese)
  Oh .... I put it on this morning and it is still there.

Do you play the bagpipes?

• Very badly.

[Caultron]

Good ones.

The fun is to reply with one of these absolutely straight and totally deadpan, like they're the most logical thing in the world, and then wait for a response.

[rick401r]

I have a tee shirt that says "No, I don't play the bloody pipes. My ancestors just killed people!"

[partlyscot]

Looking back on this thread, at first, I was so concerned, and taking careful note of the various replies, and strategies. Now though? I have never needed a comeback. Sometimes have to restrain myself in getting too enthusiastic in discussions, usually with ladies, but heated debates or negative conversations, simply hasn't happened. Total of 2 conversations with people who didn't like it, at least from their reactions, but even they refrained from making a scene about it.

[denimini]

Looking back on this thread, at first, I was so concerned, and taking careful note of the various replies, and strategies. Now though? I have never needed a comeback. Sometimes have to restrain myself in getting too enthusiastic in discussions, usually with ladies, but heated debates or negative conversations, simply hasn't happened. Total of 2 conversations with people who didn't like it, at least from their reactions, but even they refrained from making a scene about it.

That is very much as I have experienced - a total of one frown and one shake of the head, probably would have done it to saggers, tattoos, piercings and any other digressions from the super normal.
The comebacks now are really just fantasies, but good fun thinking of them. One day I may need one at short notice so it is good to be prepared.

[Fred in Skirts]

Today while checking out at Wal-Mart the SA asked why I was wearing a skirt and I told her that it was comfortable and I liked it. Her response but they are ladies clothes. I said no they were not they were mens clothes long before they were taken by the ladies. She could not come back to that.

Fred

[moonshadow]

Looking back on this thread, at first, I was so concerned, and taking careful note of the various replies, and strategies. Now though? I have never needed a comeback. Sometimes have to restrain myself in getting too enthusiastic in discussions, usually with ladies, but heated debates or negative conversations, simply hasn't happened. Total of 2 conversations with people who didn't like it, at least from their reactions, but even they refrained from making a scene about it.

That is very much as I have experienced - a total of one frown and one shake of the head, probably would have done it to saggers, tattoos, piercings and any other digressions from the super normal.
The comebacks now are really just fantasies, but good fun thinking of them. One day I may need one at short notice so it is good to be prepared.

You know I have to admit, yes I've probably received more dirty looks than I can shake a stick at, but no one has just outright came up to me and took issue with it. In fact, I've been questioned on it.... probably only one time. Which was documented here, a younger employee checker where I work (at my home store) who simply ask "uhhh.... are you wearing a skirt?" To which I believe I just replied something like "why yes I am". When asked why, I told her "you simply can't appreciate the comfort a man experiences when he wears one of these". The only other time, I wasn't really being "asked" about it, but it was rather a compliment, and it was a lady at the flea market here in Abingdon. She really loves my skirts for some reason, she's complimented them twice now.

Today while checking out at Wal-Mart the SA asked why I was wearing a skirt and I told her that it was comfortable and I liked it. Her response but they are ladies clothes. I said no they were not they were mens clothes long before they were taken by the ladies. She could not come back to that.

A rather bold move by a walmart employee. She took somewhat of a risk with her comment. I'd never tell a customer where I work "you shouldn't wear that". I would have loved to meet her and engage her in conversation. My immediate comeback would have been "why do you say that?"

Once I received the reason for her ignorance, I would proceed to enlighten her, drawing on hundreds of reasons why the concept of prohibition on certain articles of clothing based on sex is about as asinine as you can get.

I love it when they start quoting bible verses.

[moonshadow]

For some reason for me, skirting days seem easier when armed with a good comeback. Today, I decided that should a question arise, I'd keep it short and simple...

"because I hate wearing pants".

Nuff said...!

Not really an elegant, or well thought out answer... but it basically sums it all up... for me anyway.

[Caultron]

For some reason for me, skirting days seem easier when armed with a good comeback...

For me, too. It's just reassuring to know that if someone asks, you won't be stammering.