The "crazy" Russian in dresses and skirts

[Kilted_John]

crapi pants

Was that a typo or deliberate?

Have fun,


Ian.

hehe, the latter.

-J

[skirtyscot]

ST, why don't you let the neighbours, golf buddies, etc know, and then you will find out? Unlikely to be as bad as she implies.

[Caultron]

MOH even said "The kids have said that they would rather put their children in care than have you look after them because of your skirt wearing."

Despite being absolutely ignorant do the people and personalities involved, I would point out that very few people feel as your MOH says your kids feel. So the chances that they both feel that way are very small.

Your MOH, of course, is a different story. In general, I recommend keeping up gentle pressure and not inciting any major blow-ups but you know her much better than I.

[skirtingtoday]

ST, why don't you let the neighbours, golf buddies, etc know, and then you will find out? Unlikely to be as bad as she implies.

Hi SS - funny you should say that as a few neighbours from our street must have seen me in a skirt at some time or other over the last 3 years. One woman lives with her daughter (I presume separated from spouse) has seen me locally and I have chatted with her on occasions when they have looked in on their horse which they keep in a nearby field. Another neighbour walks his dog and must have noticed me in a skirt when I was cycling home through wooded paths (met him in passing on a couple of occasions).

And one of my golf mates has chatted briefly with me whilst I had on my short denim mini-skirt ... (he in his car and I was walking to where mine was parked). I would have thought that he at least would make a jokey remark (Like "WTF!!!) but he hasn't so far and that was over a year ago now. Another golf mate (ex-rugby player!) has gone out "in drag" with a few of his mates complete with flowery dress and handbag - no! Not seen that.

i have been down to the local hairdressers, Indian and Chinese takeaways and Post Office in skirts as well. Also no comments or even double-takes which I might expect.
So in all about a dozen sightings from neighbours in our street and more in the local neighbourhood have not registered any adverse comments.

[skirtyscot]

Maybe you are famous locally, so when somebody sees you skirted for the first time, it merely confirms what they have already heard.

Just about everybody round my way knows about me. I bumped into a friend a couple of weeks ago, a woman who had not seen me in a skirt before. We chatted about this and that, she asked me to do her accounts and tax return for her (yay! money!), and only after about 10 minutes did she look pointedly downwards and say "what about this?". I was beginning to think she hadn't noticed, unlikely though that seemed. "Surely you must have heard", I said, and indeed she had. I think it makes it easier.

[BobM]

The male ego is more fragile than the female. Suppose women had bowed, scraped, and capitulated at male pressure when they decided they were going to wear pants? They decided they were going to, and that was the end of the matter. For some obscure reason men apparently crave approval from everyone else at the expense of their own happiness.

[JohnH]

I say there is a syndrome in our society that I call "Masculine Anxiety". If a man is not plain and ugly in his grooming and clothing - unless he is wearing the dreaded Monkey Suit (coat and tie) he must be effeminate - something to be avoided at all costs!

John

[crfriend]

For some obscure reason men apparently crave approval from everyone else at the expense of their own happiness.

Men, also, are usually more dependent on workplace attitudes than women. Women have laws on their side; men do not. This puts the man who dares to "step one foot outside the box" at serious risk of his livelihood.

I do not know whether the predicament I'm in at the moment is related to my skirt-wearing, but I rather suspect that it may be for reasons which will not be discussed until I am separated from my current employer. Guys tend to identify with what they do, and the jobs that they hold; this gives employers positively vast power over individual mentalities, and that's pernicious -- and in failed economies (like we have in the USA) the drive to stay employed is compelling. It's quite likely that I torpedoed my future by having the stones to show up at work wearing a skirt and not being apologetic about it.

So, I can't say whether it's "craving approval" or not, but there is a very strong need for the average male to stay within the boundaries of "normalcy" (whatever that may be), for to step outside that may cause much grief indeed.

[Caultron]

For some obscure reason men apparently crave approval from everyone else at the expense of their own happiness.

Men, also, are usually more dependent on workplace attitudes than women. Women have laws on their side; men do not. This puts the man who dares to "step one foot outside the box" at serious risk of his livelihood.

To me, it seems the other way around: that women seem more unsure and crave more approval than men. They certainly complain about lack of attention more than men do.

And women get threatened with dismissal over dress code, too. I once met a woman who complimented me about having three earrings on each ear, and said she'd be fired if she got that many. This was 10-12 years ago but still...

And a recent article in the news reported a wrongful-termination lawsuit against a man who fired his female assistant because she aroused him too much. She wasn't wearing short skirts or see-through blouses, and she wasn't flirting, he just liked her too much in a way he couldn't deal with. And the court upheld the termination!

But we all have to make our own decisions, and accept or reject the limitations, consequences, and trade-offs we find ourselves in.

[crfriend]

And a recent article in the news reported a wrongful-termination lawsuit against a man who fired his female assistant because she aroused him too much. She wasn't wearing short skirts or see-through blouses, and she wasn't flirting, he just liked her too much in a way he couldn't deal with. And the court upheld the termination!

That merely points up how screwed up the legal system is.

Put bluntly, I'm a "middle-aged white male"; this means that I am disenfranchised in the US legal system when it comes to employment (and many other things). So, even if the last Manager I answered to was willing to accept my "eccentricities" the newest one isn't and my arse is on the line (the outcome is preordained). I'm just waiting for the axe to fall, and I almost welcome the time when it does because I'll no longer be in the box that Shroedinger's cat may still be in.

But we all have to make our own decisions, and accept or reject the limitations, consequences, and trade-offs we find ourselves in.

Indeed, but it's worth noting that those decisions may have ramifications long after the initial uptake.

[Grok]

For males I would say that its not a matter of craving approval, it is more a fear of (in effect) punishment. And we males are supposed to stay with in a tiny box.

[Grok]

I suspect that change will come last to the work place. Partly because of formal dress codes, but especially because your livelihood is on the line. And as a middle aged white male, I certainly don't expect that during my life time. So I dress blandly on the job.

[crfriend]

I suspect that changes will come last to the work place. Partly because of formal dress codes, but mostly because your livelihood is on the line.

That'll only happen if the legal system mandates it. Livelihoods mean nothing in the overall scheme of things (legal).

It is worth noting that there is a big difference between what's "right" and what's "legal" -- a very big difference indeed.

[Grok]

Unfortunately, change through the legal system may be very long in coming. Perhaps change will be seen by the great-grandchildren of members-during the 22nd century.

[crfriend]

Unfortunately, change through the legal system may be very long in coming. Perhaps change will be seen by the great-grandchildren of members-during the 22nd century.

I'll be long dead by then. Hell, I may be dead next week.