Do folks notice or not?

[skirtyscot]

But it seems as though many of our wives are very leary of us going out skirted, I guess they feel that we'll be made fun of, or they will get un-due attention because of our attire. We don't care if they go out wearing pants. What if the next time we refuse to let them go out wearing pants, they have to wear a skirt or dress. How'd they feel about it? They'd probably think it's rediculous. But that's the way we feel about their attitudes.

Their attitudes are reasonable, if frustrating. They don't want to get the (negative, they think) attention from us being skirted. We don't care so much (or at all) about the attention, because we get the (greater) benefits of wearing our skirts. Our spouses don't get the benefits, they just get the downside. It's the anticipated or perceived attitudes of other people around us that cause the problem for our spouses. Whether or not those attitudes are actually negative, our spouses fear them.

What brasses me off is that Mrs Skirtyscot won't even countenance going out with me skirted to see what reactions we actually get. I've told her that nobody cares, but she just won't do it. Lots of our friends have seen me in a skirt, but it's the elephant in the room. She did mention my skirts to a friend a few months ago. Surprisingly, the friend forgot about this revelation until she came to stay one weekend. She said nothing to me about my skirts, but her comment to Mrs SS was simply, "I expect it's more comfortable for him". She didn't really care. However this incident utterly failed to convince Mrs SS that my skirts are OK.

Nobody cares if your wife goes skirted or trousered - they are equally acceptable. So that's not a fair comparison.

[couyalair]

How about :
"If you want me to put on a straitjacket-trousers, then you must wear a burka."

Westerners object to the way muslim fundamentalists treat their women, so why do they inflict discomfort on us?

Martin

[Sarongman]

I was wearing the denim dress (seen last in pics and looks) at breakfast yesterday morning when a man came to the door to ask if he could use our paddock to unload an excavator from his low loader. He must have noticed, but didn't give any show of surprise. Being so caught out, my antennae were well tuned for subile signs---none were forthcoming.

[skirtingtoday]

A few days ago, I was waiting at home for an uplift of a table and chairs for a donation to a charity shop. They arrived, looked at the chairs to make sure there was a fire-proof label on them and took them away.

I was wearing a khaki box-pleat skirt approx 19" long and black tights. I'm sure he must have noticed but there was little evidence of that except at the very end, his eyes did stray downwards for a second or so... I expect in their van, the men would have made some comment to each other.

[ChrisM]

Well, I haven't posted in a while but I'll join the stories here. Of course, this is one of those "I wore a skirt and nobody cared" stories, having very little drama to it.

We recently joined a new church here in New Orleans, which has a very interesting ethnic background. There had previously been two nearby Methodist churches, one historically black, the other historically white. Both were destroyed (to various extents) by hurricane Katrina. After the storm the two congregations came together and formed a united body.

It is an amazing church, combining black gospel music and a white pastor, a diverse congregation ranging across a wide demographic and economic range. Very different from the much more homogenous origins of the two original bodies.

Anyway: Sunday as we drove to church my wife said "So you decided today was the day, eh?" How's that? Oh, I'm wearing a skirt. I hadn't really thought about the fact that this was the first time I had worn a skirt to church. I am so comfortable with my skirts, and so comfortable with my church, that I really wasn't dressing for them...I wasn't consciously picking my attire with awareness of the audience. I was simply getting dressed.

Of course, while plenty of people looked, nobody cared. Old black women in America are not used to seeing white University professors wearing skirts. It was clearly novel to some of the congregation. But it was outrageous to none of them. They looked at me with the attention that they looked at anyone novelly dressed - like the African American man in the third row wearing a Djellaba. Sure, if you stick out from the crowd you'll be noticed. But noticed is a far cry from judged, or rebuked, or whatever.

At least at our church.

All the best....Chris

[JRMILLER]

Chris,
I think it's very cool that those two churches combined into one, 40 years ago, that would have been impossible, unthinkable...

-john

[ChrisM]

John it is indeed a remarkable union. And the credit does not go (only) to the pastor - it is a remarkable group of individuals who are willing to put aside such differences and simply be a community.

If more of Christianity behaved this way the whole Church would have a much better reputation!

[BobM]

If more of Christianity behaved this way the whole Church would have a much better reputation!

Observation: too many churches are but social clubs or gathering places for people seeking societal affirmation. Listen to what comes from the pulpit, and test it against what the Scripture says. Acts 17:11, Now these were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, [b]examining the scriptures daily, whether these things were so.
[/b][/b]

[couyalair]

Observation: too many churches are but social clubs or gathering places for people ...

What else could they be in this day of age, with the great education system we have?

Today everyone knows that the universe was created in 6 days, so do you want to be told again?

Everyone knows that a fetus is more important than a mere woman, so do we need to hear the message again?

Martin

[Milfmog]

[mod hat on]

The posting rules for this site are deliberately light touch. However, rule 2, quoted below, exists for a reason.

2. No politics, unless related to skirts/kilts. No religion, unless related to skirts/kilts. These topics were banned because they lead to endless flame wars.

This thread is starting to veer towards a rule 2 infraction and, since we mods do not like to step in and get heavy, this seems to be an appropriate moment to remind folks that the rules exist. For those of you who have not read them recently, they can be found here.

Play nice now.

[/mod hat]

Have fun,


Ian.

[Sinned]

Well to get this thread back away from politics (ahem).

Butlins has been booked and I am really looking forward to a few days away with my family. Now I need to manoeuvre soon a conversation with my better half about me wearing a skirt while there so that the suggestion comes from her and not from me. I have lots of ideas and I will just have to wait for the opportunity to use one of them. It is certainly in my mind ALL the time and, considering some of the conversations we have had recently, then surely the issue must be in her mind somewhere on occasion. I just hope that she has not made the assumption that I am not considering wearing a skirt because that is considered and being outside. Ideally I would like to wear a skirt from setting off right through to arriving home. Even if I get to wear a skirt only some of the time it would be better than nothing. She might be ok with wearing a skirt at the shows because the nightclub is crowded and dark.

I must admit that I am interested in any (non-)reactions I get and am hoping that I don't get ANY adverse reaction as that would strengthen my case. I think my wife is expecting a lot of sniggering and rude remarks and if I don't get that then it might soothe her fears and make her more amenable to me wearing a skirt outside sometimes. I have no real experience of this and can only go by your experiences and comments that you have raised. I don't fear appearing in public in a slirt and have the confidence to carry it off. The person I am most worried about telling really is my mother. I just wouldn't know how to approach this - I think that she is quite relaxed about things and I am probably worrying needlessly. Don't get me wrong - I don't want to give up wearing trousers or jeans. I just want to be able, probably as with most of you, to make a skirt a normal part of my wardrobe and to be able to wear it as, when and where I like and to be accepted as such.

Sinned

[crfriend]

I think the most important thing that she must realise is that you are still you no matter what you're wearing and that what you're wearing has no bearing on anything else save, perhaps, for physical comfort. If she notices anything different, she might perceive it as a threat (as in, "He's acting differently. How is that going to affect me?").

Good luck, and enjoy your holiday!

[Milfmog]

Sinned,

Expect to get some reactions to wearing a skirt. Remember that everyone else there is also away from home and so may feel less inhibited about talking to you about it. I found that I raised a few smiles and got into plenty of unexpected conversations; that is where your attitude and demeanour really matter, if you are happy, confident and relaxed others will know and the worst you are likely to get is good natured banter. If you can give as good as you get, while everyone stays smiley all around the whole experience will be positive. That sort of interaction is even better for building up confidence (both yours and hers) than not being noticed or commented on.

The "worst" banter I had was a group of "lightly lubricated" late teenage girls who, when we were walking back to our accommodation late one evening, asked loudly "what have you got underneath". Before Carole had time to react I replied, equally loud, that a good girl would not ask, but a bad girl might get lucky and find out. Carole gave me a mock slap as they burst out laughing; everybody happy and no one offended.

You have not mentioned children (or if you have I missed it). Will you have kids with you? How do they feel about your clothing choices? Your kids being happy / unhappy around you may have a dramatic effect on how your wife reacts.

Have fun,


Ian.

[Sinned]

crfriend,

I am what I am and no longer make apologies for it. I'm in my late fifties but look younger ( no grey hairs, minimal wrinkles and long hair mostly in a ponytail ), my wife admits that and refers to me as her toyboy. I am diabetic but otherwise in not bad shape. Good genes I guess. But I'm a lot nearer my end in life to be really concerned about what others think. If I am known for being slightly eccentric but fun to be around then I'll be happy. Better that I have fewer problems than some of our noted people ( comedians that are alcoholics etc ) and I am hopefully better adjusted. Sometime soon I will post some pics possibly of the Butlins visit. I don't feel that I have changed - only become more true to myself although my wife says that I have changed. Maybe I have a little, maybe I have had to to become more like me.

Milfmog,

I am quite laid back and most times quiet but being a true Gemini I have my extrovert side. I work temporarily on a checkout at Toys R Us. I tell the customers jokes and chat quite well with them. I tease some of them but am sensitive enough not to take it too far and cause offence. I am generally quite confident and relaxed and surprised myself, when some friends called, at how I handled the situation, being confident and acting as normal as one can when being surprised. I can generally produce the quick retort when heckled although I will research some one-liners so that I am prepared. I tend to use humour to defuse situations.

As for children, my wife and I had four children - boy, boy, girl, boy. They are all grown up and moved out. Only my eldest lives out of the area. My second eldest died from leukaemia nearly five years ago, a sad tale that still breaks our hearts. My granddaughters and grandson ( to my daughter ) are used to seeing me in a skirt. In fact thetwo girls are downstairs watching one of their TV programmes. I am in the bedroom wearing a white England footie shirt, bright red lycra type skirt and dark coloured tights whilst doing this submission on the laptop.

Thanks for the morale boost and I'll post again soon.

Sinned

[BobM]

As you are you, so I am me, and at a few weeks short of 65 I don't much care who doesn't like it. I have rejoinders ready for all possible comments because in many decades of public kilt/skirt wearing I think I have heard it all.

Men, when by themselves, are usually honestly inquisitive, but when with a female, or other men they can easily perceive a threat. So, when I get (not often) the "why are you wearing a skirt" question I just say, "Well, some men require more room than others. But if you are comfortable in tight (insert type of bifurcated garment) then more power to you".

On the topic of pleasing women:

A group of girlfriends are on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only". Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.

The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside."

So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor.

The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here are short and handsome."

Still, this isn't good enough, so the friends continue on up.

They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here are tall and plain." They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up.

On the fourth floor, the sign says: "All the men here are tall and handsome. They are rich and perfectly built."

The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is still one floor left. Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth floor. There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."