My public journey #1 – The nature reserve

[CamperGuy]

Hi everyone, as I said on the Introduction page recently, I’ve been lurking for a while.

Faldaguy suggested I share some of my first-time experiences of skirting in public, in the hope it would help others. So, I have picked a selection which I’ll share as separate posts.

I’ve been wearing tights (sheer and opaque) with womens’ shorts for years in public, but wanted to take the next step 18 months ago. I concluded that tights would look better worn with a skirt and wanted to try that, but was nervous about this next step.

My first purchase was a mid-thigh khaki green mini skirt with pockets, styled more like man's shorts – I still prefer a sort of “manly” style for skirts; plus they have pockets, which is a good thing .

After wearing around the house for a while, I plucked up courage to try my 1st trip out in public - to a quiet nature reserve. I wore the skirt with opaque ribbed khaki tights and a man’s shirt.

I was careful to avoid neighbours, but the drive to the nature reserve was uneventful.

No-one was visible when I arrived. Rather than hang around feeling nervous I thought it best to bite the bullet and step out quickly, lock the car and walk away with confidence. If I had chosen a black miniskirt and skin-coloured tights I might be mistaken for wearing shorts, but this combination was pretty obvious.

1st big test: Walking towards me was a fairly macho looking guy with his dog. I decided to project confidence, so kept walking tall and called “Good Morning”. He couldn't avoid seeing what I was wearing and looked concerned. But his words surprised me: “Are you missing a dog? There is a loose dog back there. But I couldn’t catch it because I have my own with me” he said apologetically.
Despite my outfit, his only obvious concern was a stray dog. I said I’d keep an eye out for any distressed owners and we parted on good terms.

I saw one other person on the reserve – a young guy jogging towards me. He said hello as he passed.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but I was on a high from achieving this first step. I didn’t want to go directly home, so I dropped into a garden centre. On entering the building I was stopped by a smiling lady looking for signees for a charity. It was one I was interested in supporting, so I spent 15 minutes with her, standing where everyone traversing the store must pass me. When I said “Mr” for my title for the paperwork she suggested they had many options available – an indication she was clearly aware of how I was dressed.

I was over the moon after this first trip. Initial conclusions:

1) People could see what I was wearing, but gave no reactions – they have other things going on in their lives.
2) People are polite / worried about consequences if they react, so keep any opinions to themselves.
3) Looking confident, smiling and being positive clearly helps, rather than skulking around looking awkward or embarrassed.
4) Maybe my choice of more masculine colours and styles helped, or at least made me more confident.
5) Interacting with people seems to help too. Gave me more confidence and I think demonstrated to those people I was interacting with and those witnessing the interaction that I was normal despite the unconventional dress.

After this my confidence increased and I couldn’t wait for another outing. More details soon

Cheers,
Camperguy.

[Damon]

Congratulations. Well done. A few years ago I was walking my dog in a similar situation. I was wearing pants (trousers) and not as I often do a kilt I encountered a man coming the other way who was wearing a dress. He looked nervous. I said good morning. He stiffened, scowled in my direction and walked on. I I have a younger friend who sometimes wears dresses and hangs around the gay and drag scene. When I recounted that story he said to be careful. The man I met was obviously wound up tight like a spring with nervousness and might have reacted badly. It takes all sorts, I guess. Last time I met a man in a skirt, also a few years ago, I was kilted and we stopped to chat while our dogs played together. I still don't have the courage to wear a skirt in public, even after 78 years of often wearing a kilt.

[Faldaguy]

Congratulations. Well done. A few years ago I was walking my dog in a similar situation. I was wearing pants (trousers) and not as I often do a kilt I encountered a man coming the other way who was wearing a dress. He looked nervous. I said good morning. He stiffened, scowled in my direction and walked on. I I have a younger friend who sometimes wears dresses and hangs around the gay and drag scene. When I recounted that story he said to be careful. The man I met was obviously wound up tight like a spring with nervousness and might have reacted badly. It takes all sorts, I guess. Last time I met a man in a skirt, also a few years ago, I was kilted and we stopped to chat while our dogs played together. I still don't have the courage to wear a skirt in public, even after 78 years of often wearing a kilt.

Damon, I am sad that despite your comfort with a kilt your fears have precluded the pleasures of wearing skirts too. New member Camperguy above had some preliminary conclusions from his first skirted outing, and I'd say he pretty much hit it on the head with # 1, 3, 5 and the tag on #4 "feeling more confident" -- that one is truly a key in my view. But confidence comes from experience -- so sometimes you have to "fake" it at first until you have enough of those casual in the park dog conversations you mentioned, as confirmation of Camperguy's conclusions. Your confidence will start to soar after only a few outings -- give it a go. At our age it dang well does not matter what people think, and there is no glory for them in pouncing an old geezer -- go out there, have some fun. You are close to some pure Joy, go for it!

[FLbreezy]

I was over the moon after this first trip. Initial conclusions:

1) People could see what I was wearing, but gave no reactions – they have other things going on in their lives.
2) People are polite / worried about consequences if they react, so keep any opinions to themselves.
3) Looking confident, smiling and being positive clearly helps, rather than skulking around looking awkward or embarrassed.
4) Maybe my choice of more masculine colours and styles helped, or at least made me more confident.
5) Interacting with people seems to help too. Gave me more confidence and I think demonstrated to those people I was interacting with and those witnessing the interaction that I was normal despite the unconventional dress.

Well done! You really hit the nail on the head with your conclusions. You may want to try going out shopping sometime...some of my early trips wearing a skirt were to busy places like Costco. People may notice you, people may even comment, but you soon realize most are focused on shopping and don't really care about everyone else around them. It's quite a confidence boost to experience that, and I don't really think twice now.

[CamperGuy]

...He looked nervous. I said good morning. He stiffened, scowled in my direction and walked on... The man I met was obviously wound up tight like a spring with nervousness and might have reacted badly...

I guess the fear that the skirt wearer might be unhinged / unpredictable probably makes those who would otherwise make antisocial comments, more careful about doing so. Men used to cat-call women, safe in the knowledge that the woman in question was unlikely to retaliate with violence, due to the strength differential; but insulting another man, whose behaviour you are not sure of because of his unconventional appearance, coupled with that man not looking like a weak potential target, would be very risky.

[Stu]

I have tended to find that a plain denim or corduroy skirt in black, navy etc with boots and socks and a masculine sweater or jacket results in little more than the odd second glance. That's it. I would get more attention if I were wearing a bowler hat or was carrying a banjo. Nobody cares.

[sellek]

''I have tended to find that a plain denim or corduroy skirt in black, navy etc with boots and socks and a masculine sweater or jacket results in little more than the odd second glance. That's it.''

Yes indeed that does seem to be generally how it goes. The story (urban - myth?) is that denim skirts came about with us hippys in the 60's 70's when some people cut up some baggy jeans and turned them into a skirt. For me, denim skirts are the nearest I can get to a skirt designed for a man. Whether you wear denim jeans as skirts, shorts or trousers they all share many design features. I gather that last summer some people locally had not even realised I was wearing a denim skirt rather than denim shorts.