introducing myself

If you're new to the Cafe, please grab a seat by the potted palm, settle down with a nice big latte, and tell us a little bit about yourself. Please also look here for forum principles and rules.
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TheSkirtedMan
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Posts: 219
Joined: Wed May 29, 2013 6:14 pm
Location: N. Yorkshire England
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Re: introducing myself

Post by TheSkirtedMan »

Caultron wrote:As to appearing in public, the best way is however you feel most confident. People will react to your mood and demeanor much more than to your clothes. Just try to avoid anything too eccentric. Think fashion rather than fetish.

Karl, welcome to skirt cafe. We all on this forum had many queries when we decided to go public in skirts and clothing society still considers womens wear. From the many on this forum most if not all queries will have been experienced and mentioned on the many threads of this forum.

I fully agree with what Caultron has said above. I also advocate what another has said, be yourself, be proud when you wear your skirt. I think you are trying to hard especially with the impression I get that you must be seen. Going out in public you will be seen, gauranteed, except for an area void of people. Even if you think you are not seen, you will be. Are you expecting crowds to come over and provide celebrity status because you are a man in a skirt? It will not happen. The odd one or two will pass a positive compliment during a conversation. Most pass by with no reference, even the many who will talk to you as they would to others and make no reference to what you have on. There is a minority who will laugh, point at you, talk about you negatively and those you will know also except for those who will talk about you privately once you are out of sight. It is this group that will make reference to what you have on or make you aware that you are actually being seen as a man in a skirt. Forget being seen by public.

The secret to success is be you, be yourself, stand tall, be very confident. If you bring attention to yourself by looking unconfident, unsure about yourself you will bring negativity your way. If your choice of clothing is quite different to what women in skirts wear in a day to day real life negativity will be drawn. Just wear womens clothing as the ordinary woman in the street does in day to day life including their confidence and you will have no problem except for the minority as mentioned. If you make the appearance even behaviour appear as a fetish you will diffinately draw attention to yourself, more than the monority and quite possibly in a physical nature.

Many on this forum wear denim skirts, plain skirts, utilitikilts and kilts. Some wear off the peg skirts direct from womens department. Neither is wrong. It is down to you, your preference, your choice. I wear skirts, tops, cardigans and scarfs all directly from womens outlets. I go anywhere and everywhere in them except where a situation makes them not suitable. I even act as a volunteer at a National Trust property giving guided advice to many members of the public, in my skirt, top, cardigan and scarf. All my outfits are every day items women wear, but my skirts are no shorter than calf length. There is a photo of me on this forum I forget the thread. Alternate I have a small gallery on my site. I had concerns and queries when I first went public, but you soon realise people still talk to you, pass the time of day with you, ignore you just as if you were in society expected male clothing. The exception is the small minority, but they are small in number as in mind. If they are not talking about you then they are of others, its their problem, leave it with them.

You have a supportive wife and it is what you and your wife want to do. You are doing no physical harm to others. I too have a supportive wife yet there are many on this forum who don't have supportive wives/partners. Confidence, but above all appearance that is not too out of the ordinary, even on a man is the success including going about your life as if you still had the stereotypical male clothing on. You do not have to start in the dark. Ideally start off with just you and your wife in a quiet location but you appear to have got past the initial stage. Now go where you know people are for definate, but just appear as everybody else does, in appearance and stature.
Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.
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Pdxfashionpioneer
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Re: introducing myself

Post by Pdxfashionpioneer »

Hello Karl,

Welcome to the SkirtCafe. I too feel looked very relaxed and comfortable in that first picture. Our brother who volunteers for your National Trust got it exactly right.

I also like to point out that there is a very broad range of looks you will find in the photos. Nearly all are submitted by fellows, like me who very matter-of-factly go out in public in our outfits without a great deal of notice or comment, except for the occasional compliment. Today, I got into a conversation with a fellow who, like me was waiting for his prescription at the pharmacist's. He asked me if I was wearing my dress as part of my religious practice. Nope. "Are you gay?" Wrong again. "I'll bet you get asked that a lot." I told him that, 'Most people just roll with it.' In fact, he's the first person to ask me that. His comments on Mormons satisfied he's a little bit of a jerk, but harmless.

You have a wife who not only supports you in being yourself, it turns her on. You really couldn't ask for more. As another member said, don't overthink all of this just be yourself, do what feels comfortable enough to try it (we all feel some apprehension about wearing a new outfit, or going to a new place) and revel in the joy of being yourself.

Feels great, doesn't it?

Have fun'
David, the PDX Fashion Pioneer

Social norms aren't changed by Congress or Parliament; they're changed by a sufficient number of people ignoring the existing ones and publicly practicing new ones.
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