Long time listener, first time caller

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dontcallmediane
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Long time listener, first time caller

Post by dontcallmediane »

Hello all! I have read quite a bit here, and I'm amazed at the sheer number of differences with regards to how and why guys dig skirts. I've come here in the hopes of gaining the courage to explore this side of me.

I guess I've always had a penchant for the effeminate. From a very young age (pre-k) I found myself curious why girls always got the *interesting* clothes. The mind boggling number of fabrics, styles and colors not available to me because of my penis. dammit. As with many of you, I went through my period of exploration and confusion regarding my gender identity and such. Nearing 40 now, the last few years I've somewhat found myself and finally settled on who I am and what I want.

I'm not looking to "pass". I'm not interested in transitioning. I'm not one of those that understands why a guy without breasts would want to wear a bra. I'm just a man that happens to like women's clothing, skirts and hosiery specifically. For the most part, I'm a utilitarian. Skirts are damn comfortable.

No one knows. It's still very dark in my closet. But, the last few years I have made some progress. I always wanted to shave my legs, and I not only got the courage to do so, but even told my wife. She was appalled and amused at the idea initially, but after pointing out how little it affects her, and how much I enjoy it she backed way off. I could tell that she literally couldn't come up with a single counter argument. I can tell she isn't terribly happy about it, but she has dropped it as a matter of contention. In fact, I think she is a little jealous. I've gotten very good at using an epilator and my hair grows back so slow it infuriates her sometimes. It takes very little work for me to have wonderfully smooth legs.

At one point one of her best friends noticed and asked me about shaving my legs. She asked why and I said "why do you? I doubt it's because you have to and more because you enjoy it". My wife seemed to think this would bother me, and adamantly expressed sympathy that she, indeed, did not prompt her friends questions. I told her simply "I know it wasn't you, and I wouldn't continue to bare my legs if I felt I would ever be embarrassed by it".

So, my next big step should I ever choose to take it, is skirts. I looove skirts. Skirts on women, skirts on me, who cares. So much freedom, so comfortable. I only own 1, a longish running skirt just above the knees. I long for the day i could wear it anywhere for any length of time.

But I know this will be much harder for my wife than the legs, and I'm dreading bringing it up, ever. Honestly, she is about the only person whose opinion I really care about. If i had her support I would have no reserves about skirting absolutely anywhere. sigh.

And here I am, courage shopping.

Thanks for listening!
Ray
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by Ray »

Welcome to the cafe!

I'm a big fan of the skirt and hosiery look myself, particularly sheer hosiery. I've shaved my legs for 17 years now and my wife is quite relaxed about it. Tactility rocks, and there's no reason why we chaps can't enjoy the sensations of skirts, hosiery etc. Ray
dillon
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by dillon »

Welcome, dontcallmediane.

I am also blessed to have a wife who, while not enthusiastic, is at least tolerant of my quirks and fancies.
As a matter of fact, the sun DOES shine out of my ...
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moonshadow
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by moonshadow »

Hello and welcome!

When you're ready to "out" yourself, I think you'll find the world of skirtiness quite fun!
-Andrea
The old hillbilly from the coal fields of the Appalachian mountains currently living like there's no tomorrow on the west coast.
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Caultron
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by Caultron »

Welcome, dontcallmediane, you've found kindred spirits.

As to skirts and your wife, my usual advice is to go slowly, tread carefully, never give up, and never ask permission.

Tell her, for example, that this is something you've been thinking about for a long time and now want to try. Maybe it's just around the house at first, or only when she's not home, or only when you're some distance away from home. But find a foothold and go from there.

Assure her your interest is only to find out what it's like to wear a skirt, and that you have no interest in wigs, makeup, padded bras, or impersonating a woman (unless, of course, you do).

One way to get started is to buy a few skirts from a thrift store and try them out. This helps you find your size and get comfortable with the idea and the experience and yourself. And for only $5 apiece, you can afford to experiment. Your size is probably your pants size divided by two and less another two. I'm a 36 waist, for example, and usually wear a size 16 skirt. Or bring a tape measure and look for something with half your waist size inside the skirt waist. Depending on your height, 20" waist to hem is usually just above the knee and 24" just below.

Taking a skirt into the dressing rooms may be scary at first but really, it's OK. No one will really notice what you've got under your arm, and even if they do, the store workers have seen it all before.

You may get a few curious looks but so what? Be confident! If necessary, have an excuse ready such as, "It's for my wife/sister/whatever who's ill and needs a different size." But the overwhelming possibility is that no one will say anything, either in the clothes racks or at the cashier. The greatest impediment by far is yourself.

Good luck and keep us posted!
Courage, conviction, nerve, verve, dash, panache, guts, nuts, balls, gall, élan, stones, whatever. Get some and get skirted.

caultron
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moonshadow
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by moonshadow »

Caultron wrote:I'm a 36 waist, for example, and usually wear a size 16 skirt.
Interesting... My pants size is 36, yet a size 10 with an elastic waist fits me quite well. I can go to 12, but it's a little loose. Also many of my skirts just say "M" (Medium) and fit well. I would think a 16 would fall off of me. Never tried one though.

Vanity sizing?

Also, as far as the wife, although they are a bit more expensive than a thrift store skirt, you might try ordering something marketed to men as well. Such as a kilt, or a Macabi skirt. The Macabi is really just a regular skirt made of nylon, but since it says "for men too" on the website, sometimes it takes the sting out of "coming out of the skirt closet".

At least it did for me. And they are good in inclement weather too!
-Andrea
The old hillbilly from the coal fields of the Appalachian mountains currently living like there's no tomorrow on the west coast.
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Caultron
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by Caultron »

moonshadow wrote:...Interesting... My pants size is 36, yet a size 10 with an elastic waist fits me quite well. I can go to 12, but it's a little loose. Also many of my skirts just say "M" (Medium) and fit well. I would think a 16 would fall off of me. Never tried one though...
I think you have a thinner build than I do, and probably wear the skirt higher above the hips.
Courage, conviction, nerve, verve, dash, panache, guts, nuts, balls, gall, élan, stones, whatever. Get some and get skirted.

caultron
skirtingseattle
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Re: Long time listener, first time caller

Post by skirtingseattle »

The best way to size a skirt IMO is to measure around that section of your body where you want to wear the skirt. Often, this is the measurement around the belly button, but if you prefer to wear the skirt lower on your hips, then measure there. Half that number and take a measure with you to the store. Lay flat any skirt you fancy and measure it and find one that syncs up with your number. I find this is the most accurate way to size a skirt as there is too much variation between manufacturers and factories.

I am 36" around the belly button, and I prefer an 18 - 20" drop, from the belly button down, for my sport/utility kilts (a traditional Scottish tartan kilt would be 24"). For miniskirts, I prefer 12" drop. When I am shopping for skirts, I have found items varying from US sizes 10 - 14, so I will be looking in this range and then pulling out the tape measure to check actual size.

Good luck and happy skirting,
Chris
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