Tutus for men

Clippings from news sources involving fashion freedom and other gender equality issues.
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Elisabetta
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Re: Tutus for men

Post by Elisabetta »

moonshadow wrote:Not wanting to start another topic that would have been a duplicate of an older one, I input "goodwin" in the skirtcafe search box and came up to this thread. I had just completed reading a somewhat older (2013) article located here..

After some further reading on Mr. Goodwin, I think it's safe to say that this man must be the father of all M.I.S. in the modern era. Though he may differ from most of us on terminology and labels, (he considers himself a crossdresser), he is probably more like us than typical "woman impersonating" crossdressers are.

As I read the article above, I am blown away by how long this man has been wearing "women's" clothes, and props to him for doing so in what has been regarded as one of the most macho states in the union. But to begin "dressing" in 1972 would have been a very brave practice even in the most accepting areas of the nation. Suffice it to say, if the current year were 1972 I seriously doubt I would be able to get away with how I dress in this area. Though 99% of people don't bother me, on almost every outing, I catch the eye of at least one oaf that would probably love to slit my throat in a back alley if he thought he could get away with it.

Watch this video to meet Mr. Goodman.

I'll say, his style makes mine look "manly" by comparison, he is really into lacey numbers and puffy blouses more so that I am, and even myself, being the flamboyant "male skirt wearer" that I am, couldn't help by chuckle a little under my breath as he selected a wrench at the local hardware store in this pink and yellow getup. I admit to feeling just a bit guilty as I did so. Still yet, I'd love to meet this man someday, a true pioneer of freedom from traditional male gender roles, and though he sets the femme bar pretty high, I'd say somewhat of a role model for people like myself.

My chuckle followed by almost choking up reading about this struggles with life, "friends", unsupportive family, work problems, etc. I read as he stated he'd look in the mirror every day and tearfully utter "you are a good person". Though I may not have used those exact words, many-a-days I have spent in such a funk, with my own problems at work, shunning by family and former friends, and other various dramas, I must confess I too often struggle to find a reason to press on. Sometimes I feel the only reason I don't is because I'm too damned ornery to give society what they want (a world without Moon)... My wife and daughter do support me, but that's about as far as it goes. It hurts to have to be someone else whenever I go to a family function, it hurts to have to wear "the uniform" in my own house when mom comes over to avoid the drama. I recently updated all of my photo collages on the wall with some more recent ones of us (every one of me was one of me wearing a skirt or dress), and I wondered how that would go over when/if family ever come to visit, will I have to take the pictures off the wall? The thought of it depresses me. The real salt in this open wound is that the women in my family continue to wear whatever the hell they want! It's not easy, it's quite bothersome. His story about work struck a chord with me. If only I had a good union to fall back on, rather than my companies version of "don't ask, don't tell".

But I can relate to this guy. He speaks a language I understand. It's nice to know people like that exist. The knowledge of that gets me through the bad days. I'd like to meet him someday. Maybe he'll google his name (Larry Goodman) and find this post.

I don't try to be so pessimistic about everything, but it seems I always find myself surrounded by people who constantly aim to bring me down. Sometimes, I find myself forcing myself to keep my head low and in the dumps because I figure, "why bother being in a good mood? Someone always tears it down anyway..."

I'm scheduled for my vacation in September, perhaps a little road trip would be good for the soul... Unfortunately a trip to Portland to meet Mr. Goodman might be a little out of reach and budget, but maybe some other time.

Moon let me tell you something as your wife. Now I love your mom however when it comes to our house they got two choices: Get over it or get out. I'm not taking pictures down. No you don't have to wear a uniform in your own house. If they don't like it they can go home. They don't stay long enough for you to worry over it anyways so why are you worrying? You're a grown man start acting like one when it comes to your own home and how you dress. Now I know you love your mom but it's time you quit letting her control your life.
"When life gets blurry adjust your focus."
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crfriend
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Re: Tutus for men

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JennC03 wrote:Moon let me tell you something as your wife. Now I love your mom however when it comes to our house they got two choices: Get over it or get out. I'm not taking pictures down. No you don't have to wear a uniform in your own house. If they don't like it they can go home. They don't stay long enough for you to worry over it anyways so why are you worrying? You're a grown man start acting like one when it comes to your own home and how you dress. Now I know you love your mom but it's time you quit letting her control your life.
Jenn, if I was there I could hug you for simply saying that to Moon. Awesome.

I was contemplating mentioning to Moon that he always has the option of "manning up" and telling his family what to do with themselves, and that sentiment sticks. Moon is who he is, and there's no point in him trying to bend over backwards to make his "family" happy, mainly because he'll fail in multiple creative ways because it's likely not possible.

Families are fickle things, and I'm guessing that most of his relatives are older than he is -- that makes him "the baby", and that never changes (or only changes very slowly). He'll be "the baby" of the family until he's the last one standing. (I ran smack dab into that phenomenon in 2015 when I wound up living with my elder aunt for a few weeks. I remained the "baby" until she actually saw me in action in a very stressful situation and figured out that I was actually an adult. It took her a little while longer to accept my odd sartorial style, but seems to be fine with it now so there is hope.)

So, yes, leave the pictures up. There's no point in pretending to be something that one is not, and the sooner that gets driven home the better. I know that even paranoids can have enemies, but Moon seems to be taking it to an extreme. It's a skirt for gods' sakes. Get over it!
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Elisabetta
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Re: Tutus for men

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crfriend wrote:
JennC03 wrote:Moon let me tell you something as your wife. Now I love your mom however when it comes to our house they got two choices: Get over it or get out. I'm not taking pictures down. No you don't have to wear a uniform in your own house. If they don't like it they can go home. They don't stay long enough for you to worry over it anyways so why are you worrying? You're a grown man start acting like one when it comes to your own home and how you dress. Now I know you love your mom but it's time you quit letting her control your life.
Jenn, if I was there I could hug you for simply saying that to Moon. Awesome.

I was contemplating mentioning to Moon that he always has the option of "manning up" and telling his family what to do with themselves, and that sentiment sticks. Moon is who he is, and there's no point in him trying to bend over backwards to make his "family" happy, mainly because he'll fail in multiple creative ways because it's likely not possible.

Families are fickle things, and I'm guessing that most of his relatives are older than he is -- that makes him "the baby", and that never changes (or only changes very slowly). He'll be "the baby" of the family until he's the last one standing. (I ran smack dab into that phenomenon in 2015 when I wound up living with my elder aunt for a few weeks. I remained the "baby" until she actually saw me in action in a very stressful situation and figured out that I was actually an adult. It took her a little while longer to accept my odd sartorial style, but seems to be fine with it now so there is hope.)

So, yes, leave the pictures up. There's no point in pretending to be something that one is not, and the sooner that gets driven home the better. I know that even paranoids can have enemies, but Moon seems to be taking it to an extreme. It's a skirt for gods' sakes. Get over it!
Thank you Carl. It's true though he really needs to stand up for himself.
"When life gets blurry adjust your focus."
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moonshadow
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Re: Tutus for men

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crfriend wrote:I was contemplating mentioning to Moon that he always has the option of "manning up" and telling his family what to do with themselves, and that sentiment sticks. Moon is who he is, and there's no point in him trying to bend over backwards to make his "family" happy, mainly because he'll fail in multiple creative ways because it's likely not possible.
Well, that's basically what I do, and I believe that's one of the latest reasons they have little to do with me anymore. It's that part that hurts, that these people have chosen to estrange from my life rather than lay aside their petty prejudices. It makes one question his place in the family all along. It's just a big bitter pill to swallow, and you can feel it all the way down.

I'm actually not the baby, I'm the oldest son, my sister is 9 years younger than I am. I had a step sister once who was a few years younger than me but she died when I was 20 years old.

The ironic thing is one reason for my being somewhat of a "black sheep" on mom's side is because that side of the family wanted the first grandchild to be a girl! So on mom's side I never rated, on dad's the story was similar, however being the son of a "middle child" (dad), didn't afford any high status on my account on that side of the family either. To be fair, it couldn't have been the skirts fault, after all, my shunning was starting long before the skirts came along, but as is the case with work... it didn't help.

I suppose I could call it a good thing that the skirts and dresses helped to drive the final nail in that coffin. One nice thing about this choice in style is it has a way of exposing who really wants to be in your life and who doesn't.

Oh, I guess it's just the same old chestnut it's always been.

However, truthfully if they can't accept me for how I am, then frankly I don't want them in my life anyway. That's all fine and well, but if I don't make an occasional effort to reach out to them they get all pissy about it. So it's damned if I do, and damned if I don't. They demand I be in their life, but they want me to be the person they want me to be, not who I am, not only in dress, but in every part of my personality.

Now my sister, she can run off and be total alpha macho, hunt, fish, cuss, drink, party, be arrogant, etc etc, and that's okay, nobody has a problem with that, in fact it's encouraged, but I got my ass rolled by mom when I had to audacity to wear a black Macabi in my own house when she paid a visit! That wasn't even one of my more flamboyant outfits!
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Elisabetta
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Re: Tutus for men

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moonshadow wrote:
crfriend wrote:I was contemplating mentioning to Moon that he always has the option of "manning up" and telling his family what to do with themselves, and that sentiment sticks. Moon is who he is, and there's no point in him trying to bend over backwards to make his "family" happy, mainly because he'll fail in multiple creative ways because it's likely not possible.
Well, that's basically what I do, and I believe that's one of the latest reasons they have little to do with me anymore. It's that part that hurts, that these people have chosen to estrange from my life rather than lay aside their petty prejudices. It makes one question his place in the family all along. It's just a big bitter pill to swallow, and you can feel it all the way down.

I'm actually not the baby, I'm the oldest son, my sister is 9 years younger than I am. I had a step sister once who was a few years younger than me but she died when I was 20 years old.

The ironic thing is one reason for my being somewhat of a "black sheep" on mom's side is because that side of the family wanted the first grandchild to be a girl! So on mom's side I never rated, on dad's the story was similar, however being the son of a "middle child" (dad), didn't afford any high status on my account on that side of the family either. To be fair, it couldn't have been the skirts fault, after all, my shunning was starting long before the skirts came along, but as is the case with work... it didn't help.

I suppose I could call it a good thing that the skirts and dresses helped to drive the final nail in that coffin. One nice thing about this choice in style is it has a way of exposing who really wants to be in your life and who doesn't.

Oh, I guess it's just the same old chestnut it's always been.

However, truthfully if they can't accept me for how I am, then frankly I don't want them in my life anyway. That's all fine and well, but if I don't make an occasional effort to reach out to them they get all pissy about it. So it's damned if I do, and damned if I don't. They demand I be in their life, but they want me to be the person they want me to be, not who I am, not only in dress, but in every part of my personality.

Now my sister, she can run off and be total alpha macho, hunt, fish, cuss, drink, party, be arrogant, etc etc, and that's okay, nobody has a problem with that, in fact it's encouraged, but I got my ass rolled by mom when I had to audacity to wear a black Macabi in my own house when she paid a visit! That wasn't even one of my more flamboyant outfits!

That's when you have to make a choice Moon. You stand there and take it or walk away. I know it's hard walking but sometimes you got to for your own sanity. If they love you they'll build a bridge and get over it or die miserable. You can't make them love you and don't waste time living in misery eventually they'll come around but remember it's their problem not yours so don't stress and make it your problem. Trust me I really do know how you feel. Had to do it myself. I love my family from a distance maybe you can try it too. I know it hurts I really do but eventually you're going to have to make a descion let them drag you down or be that grown man that puts his foot down and doesn't let people control his life. You don't control hers she shouldn't yours.
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Re: Tutus for men

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JennC03 wrote:That's when you have to make a choice Moon. You stand there and take it or walk away. I know it's hard walking but sometimes you got to for your own sanity. If they love you they'll build a bridge and get over it or die miserable. You can't make them love you and don't waste time living in misery eventually they'll come around but remember it's their problem not yours so don't stress and make it your problem. Trust me I really do know how you feel. Had to do it myself. I love my family from a distance maybe you can try it too. I know it hurts I really do but eventually you're going to have to make a descion let them drag you down or be that grown man that puts his foot down and doesn't let people control his life. You don't control hers she shouldn't yours.
Jenn, I think Moon has the right to distance himself from his family, BUT you do need to help him when he needs it. I know you try hard to do this, but it can get pretty hard sometimes. I know from where he comes. I myself had to let family go when I did not fit in with my mothers plans, I was 17 and decided that it was time I stopped the derision that was being heaped upon me by her and her friend. So I made up my mind and went and joined the USAF. She said she would never sign so I told her if she did not I would forge her name anyway. She signed and the rest as they say is history.
So cheer up and don't let them get you down either of you!!
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
Always be yourself because the people that matter don’t mind and the ones that mind don’t matter.
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Elisabetta
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Re: Tutus for men

Post by Elisabetta »

Fred in Skirts wrote:
JennC03 wrote:That's when you have to make a choice Moon. You stand there and take it or walk away. I know it's hard walking but sometimes you got to for your own sanity. If they love you they'll build a bridge and get over it or die miserable. You can't make them love you and don't waste time living in misery eventually they'll come around but remember it's their problem not yours so don't stress and make it your problem. Trust me I really do know how you feel. Had to do it myself. I love my family from a distance maybe you can try it too. I know it hurts I really do but eventually you're going to have to make a descion let them drag you down or be that grown man that puts his foot down and doesn't let people control his life. You don't control hers she shouldn't yours.
Jenn, I think Moon has the right to distance himself from his family, BUT you do need to help him when he needs it. I know you try hard to do this, but it can get pretty hard sometimes. I know from where he comes. I myself had to let family go when I did not fit in with my mothers plans, I was 17 and decided that it was time I stopped the derision that was being heaped upon me by her and her friend. So I made up my mind and went and joined the USAF. She said she would never sign so I told her if she did not I would forge her name anyway. She signed and the rest as they say is history.
So cheer up and don't let them get you down either of you!!

Fred I always help Moon. I have told him how to.eliminate that drama on his life but.hes got to want to fix it otherwise it's a repeated cycle. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.
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Fred in Skirts
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Re: Tutus for men

Post by Fred in Skirts »

JennC03 wrote:Fred I always help Moon. I have told him how to.eliminate that drama on his life but.hes got to want to fix it otherwise it's a repeated cycle. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.
So true. Change can only come with work and want to. Hang in there and tell moon I am on his side come HELL or high water.
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
Always be yourself because the people that matter don’t mind and the ones that mind don’t matter.
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Re: Tutus for men

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You can plan an event (and make sure you have good camera coverage of the room with excellent resolution)....and special people pre-selected so you can get the face shots....

:evil: :evil: :evil: Shrug and say "ok...I'll change..." and step out of the room..... ..... ..... ....and make a grand entrance in fire-engine red fishnet hose and halter top with some kind of silvery, shimmery micro-mini with 3" red ankle boots. And some accessories: silver pendant (pentacle ?) ear rings, diamond-studded choker and some kind of bracelet.

And probably have to have the whole thing tailored so it fits like a glove as you pull off a 'most muscular' pose, etc. :evil: :evil: :evil:

It's amazing what you can come up with once you start down one of these garden paths.....
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Re: Tutus for men

Post by Gordon »

Yea, I can picture that.
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Namaste,
Gordon
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