Searching for a name

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Emerald Witch
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Searching for a name

Post by Emerald Witch »

Several of my friends from the Eddie Izzard website and I were batting around the problem that we still don't have a proper name for us ladies who so love to look at blokes in skirts.

Now, I know some of you are very masculine, and some run the full spectrum from "just a little softened around the edges" to full-on makeup-wearing transvestites, practically transgendered. (I won't include anyone who IS transgendered because by definition then you are no longer a bloke, and most of us don't consider ourselves lesbians.)

The point is, we love you! And we don't have a group-defining name, and I think we need one so men can know that they are appreciated by this target audience, and can feel more comfortable coming out. Maybe even hookng up! I know I for one would LOVE to meet a wonderful man in my area who wore skirts and makeup. But what are my chances of meeting one if they are all in the closet?

"Skirt-Chasers" has been suggested, but I don't think it's appropriate because 1. men already use it, and 2. it makes us sound like lesbians.

I quite like "Transfans". Sounds mysterious and I can't think of any derogatory derivation. Does it strike anyone else here very well?

Anyone else got any other ideas or suggestions? I'd really love to hear them!
ChristopherJ
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Post by ChristopherJ »

Brainstorming session . . . .

Skirtaholics?
Skirt maniacs?
Skirt groupies?
Skirt girls?
Skirt beasties?
Skirt disciples?
Skirt acolytes?


I know!!! It has to be . . . . Skirt babes!

Yeah!
:)
It's never too late to have a happy childhood . . .
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Re: Searching for a name

Post by Departed Member »

Emerald Witch wrote:Several of my friends from the Eddie Izzard website and I were batting around the problem that we still don't have a proper name for us ladies who so love to look at blokes in skirts.

Now, I know some of you are very masculine, and some run the full spectrum from "just a little softened around the edges" to full-on makeup-wearing transvestites, practically transgendered. (I won't include anyone who IS transgendered because by definition then you are no longer a bloke, and most of us don't consider ourselves lesbians.)
With all due respect, 99+% of the blokes on this forum are not, repeat, not, "full-on makeup-wearing transvestites", or even "softened around the edges". There are other websites (such as The Atrium) catering admirably for folk who are happy to be thus categorised. Most of us (I feel I have to say) wouldn't be here, if that was the case.

As I see it, Eddie Izzard (a brilliant actor and outstandingly clever comedian) claims to be a 'transvestite' for purely publicity reasons. On interview, he's outlined that quite openly. Invariably, he dons make-up for his stage 'persona' and (these days) rarely dons skirts, high heels, etc. other than as an adjunct to this. Fine, he's been 'around town' in a frock on occasion, but he is, at heart, just a true publicity-seeking professional! He's not remotely representative of all but (possibly?) a tiny minority here. Although I admire him (immensely!) as a truly talented stage performer, he doesn't exactly 'help' the cause (if that is the word) of blokes who just want 'to be comfortable', i.e., un-bifurcated!

Trans-gender (my definition: One who has physically undergone surgery to establish/confirm their true gender - no offence intended to those part-way - I do understand, please believe me!) does not have to mean, dressing as my/your 1950's "Maiden Aunt" - however, sadly, some 'medical' practitioners will not 'sign off' folk who wish to 'transition', unless they adopt this (outdated) style of attire. I've known folk in this quandary, but be fully aware - they are not 'men in skirts', by any means. It takes a very brave and resolute person to take that particular road to it's end. They may, indeed, pass down this road, en route, but only they can tell you if they've made the right decision, for them, when they get there. As such, they fall out of the specific scope of this forum, but can, of course(!), contribute much (skirt-related thoughts ) on their chosen path.
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trainman
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Re: Searching for a name

Post by trainman »

Emerald Witch wrote:I quite like "Transfans". Sounds mysterious and I can't think of any derogatory derivation. Does it strike anyone else here very well?
Off the top of my head, it sounds like a Tranny Chaser...
Trainman is...

...Geek in Goth clothing!
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WSmac
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Re: Searching for a name

Post by WSmac »

Emerald Witch wrote:...by definition then you are no longer a bloke, and most of us don't consider ourselves lesbians.
that hurts :cry: ... sniffle ...sniffle
:wink:

Transfans would fit if you only if you really loved me Emerald. :( :wink:

For the majority (like Merlin) here, the prefix 'trans' does not seem to fit.
They are not 'trans'-ing anything here except public ignorance.

Better to stick with skirt, or kilt along with man or male, or something close to that.

Menskirt Lover?
Skirtman Lover?
Kilt Lover?
Homo Skirtus Adorus?... sorry, that 'homo' part probably wouldn't work so well :P

Bare-Legged Man chaser?

My head hurts, can I stop thinking now? :D
WSmac
SkirtDude

Re: Searching for a name

Post by SkirtDude »

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Last edited by SkirtDude on Tue Jul 14, 2009 2:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
Bob
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Post by Bob »

Thanks, SkirtDude.

I would add the definition of "Transvestite" as a guy who enjoys dressing, going out and "passing" as a woman for fun. Transsexuals and transvestites both put a lot of effort into passing. But the transsexul feels a disconnect between inner and outer sense of gender, while the transvestite is just having fun with temporary role playing. More often than not, the transvestite's activity is secretive.

As far as I know, there are no trasnvestites at SkirtCafe: we have a policy that if you're a "man" (according to your own definition), then you cannot use a femme name. But I do believe we have a lot of would-be or ex- transvestites who realized it's OK for a guy to just wear a skirt without all the secrecy, drama and pretense.
Now, I know some of you are very masculine, and some run the full spectrum from "just a little softened around the edges" to full-on makeup-wearing transvestites, practically transgendered.
So Miss Witch, please don't include the term "trans" in your word. Most of us are not transgender, transsexual or transvestite in any way, although some of us may be genderqueer. In any case, we need to educate the world that a guy can wear a skirt and still be a guy, without calling his gender or sexual identity into question.

And for the most part, that's what we are: beer drinking, barebequeue-cooking, pickup-truck driving, football-loving guys. And sometimes we get into "guy fights" online. But we're also guys who have the balls to wear a skirt or a kilt and not look away in shame.
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Re: Searching for a name

Post by Departed Member »

SkirtDude wrote:
Trans-gender (my definition:...
I may be able to help a little here since I was kicking around in the trans community before discovering that one can just be a man in a skirt and not have to repeatedly explain all this gobeltygoop.

Somebody who is "transexual" has had or is about to have sexual reassignment surgery. There are further subcategories of (pre-op / post-op) and (male to female / female to male)


Sorry, I intended to add this earlier ... I always used to use the word, "Transexual" (exactly as your definition clearly states). However, folk of that ilk that I've met over the past five years or so, have been most insistent that they prefer the term, "Transgender", in respect of those who are on the SRS road. Again, I suspect this 'change of terminology' may be peculiar to the UK. Bearing in mind the last two M-F people I spoke to had no intention, whatsoever, in entering into any form of sexual relationship with a man, then I can fully understand their sensibilities.
SkirtDude

Post by SkirtDude »

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Last edited by SkirtDude on Tue Jul 14, 2009 2:20 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Departed Member »

SkirtDude wrote: Merlin - I get the general impression that gender changes via surgery are "loosing traction". I consider that to be a good thing overall as it means people are realizing they can be themselves without the damage massive hormone doses and surgery causes to one's body. Perhaps "transgender" is being used in the UK where the newish "genderqueer" term is gaining popularity in the states?
To be honest, I don't that is the case in the UK. SRS (or, GRS, if you prefer) has lost no impetus in numbers, as far as I can tell. One factor that is changing, is the lesser use of (oestrogen) hormones. There's less emphasis on (larger) breast enhancement. As for the surgery, it's now so advanced, that there is little cause for concern in this respect. The only 'common' prohibitive factor for some is - cost!
ChristopherJ
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Post by ChristopherJ »

As I see it, Eddie Izzard (a brilliant actor and outstandingly clever comedian) claims to be a 'transvestite' for purely publicity reasons.
I don't think that is the case. Eddie Izzard was dressing in female clothing from the age of about 15 onwards. Full time - almost. As he developed as a comedian he made a concious decision not to make any effort to hide his tranvestite leanings - and that caused him a lot of grief along the way.

It is only in recent years - since he became VERY famous - that he has largely stopped dressing up for his stage or TV act (although he still wears nail paint) - largely because it was becoming so expected of him - and he felt that in the mind of the public, the tranvestite aspect of his character was starting to overshadow his comedy skills. So he cut back on dressing up etc.

It would not be fair to say that Eddie Izzard claimed to be a transvestite purely for publicity reasons - in fact, the opposite is the case.
It's never too late to have a happy childhood . . .
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Post by Departed Member »

ChristopherJ wrote:
As I see it, Eddie Izzard (a brilliant actor and outstandingly clever comedian) claims to be a 'transvestite' for purely publicity reasons.
It would not be fair to say that Eddie Izzard claimed to be a transvestite purely for publicity reasons - in fact, the opposite is the case.
Claims, not claimed! I'm well aware of his past history. As I understand it, he never attempted to appear 'femme' or 'as a woman', therefore, in my book, he wasn't actually a 'transvestite' as such. Just because he said he was, doesn't necessarily make it so. I tell folk, I'm the nicest bloke they'll ever meet in their lives - just never cross 'me or mine'. After a while, they all start to believe just that.....

Folk attending Eddie's more recent gigs have been reported as saying they were very disappointed he hadn't even 'glammed up', never mind dress/skirt or whatever. However, any person who can be funny, in French of all languages, has to have one h*ll of a comedy talent.
Top bloke! :lol:
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WSmac
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Post by WSmac »

So, Merlin, SkirtDude, have you guys figured out a name for Emerald Witch yet? :D

It's interesting how several threads over time have evolved into trans-discussions when the original post was nothing of the sort. :wink:

Okay Class, everyone back on topic! :D

I'm truly interested in the name variations we can come up with around here!
WSmac
Emerald Witch
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Re: Searching for a name

Post by Emerald Witch »

merlin wrote:With all due respect, 99+% of the blokes on this forum are not, repeat, not, "full-on makeup-wearing transvestites", or even "softened around the edges". There are other websites (such as The Atrium) catering admirably for folk who are happy to be thus categorised. Most of us (I feel I have to say) wouldn't be here, if that was the case.
Gosh. I'm really sorry I seem to have hit such a nerve. Obviously you know your club here better than I do, and I would have no way of knowing the makeup and attitude of all the members here after such a short time hanging around.

For what it's worth, I 100% agree that wearing a kilt is a fully masculine garment, with no feminine connotations at all. Like a Roman gladiator's leather garment, or a toga, or something like that. Very masculine, and very sexy for being so masculine. Ignites the fires of feminine yearning within me, etc.

But I know that in my short time here I HAVE seen a range of difference. I have seen men talking about wearing miniskirts, wearing differently patterned skirts, pleats, ruffles, pantyhose and tights, different shoes, undergarments, makeup, etc. Maybe it is only one percent of the members here who are talking about these things, but still they ARE being mentioned. And I wanted those men to know they are also included in my question.

Men who lean towards feminine dress are still sexy to many women (INCLUDING ME). And we women who appreciate men in skirts, even men in FEMININE skirts, long for recognition because we feel it's time to bring this whole issue out of the closet. It's time to break down the walls of bigotry and fear for everyone.

P.S. What you said about Eddie Izzard was complete bunk. I don't know where you got your information, but as I bow to your knowledge of this club because you're a longstanding member here, you would do well to bow to me as an immersed fan of Eddie. You obviously have not researched him well.
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Post by Bob »

Miss Witch,

SkirtCafe has attracted many new members recently, which is good. But it's also a time of change, in which many are just learning our community ethos.

In past years, we used to argue a lot about whether one outfit was "too feminine" or not, or whether it was "crossing the line." Everyone agreed kilts were very manly, but beyond that there was a lot of bickering. Overall, people were divided into "bravehearts" (kilt-only guys) and "freestylers" (guys into anything else), with the implication that the freestylers were maybe less manly (or more T* in some way) than the bravehearts. At one point, most of the bravehearts left, leaving many of the remaining members worried this was going to turn into a tranny board of one sort or another.

Meanwhile, guys would argue about what is "over the edge." What about makeup? What about pantyhose? What about tutus? One guy would be into lipstick but would feel that pantyhose are just way too feminine for him, while another would never THINK of wearing lipstick but has no problem with pantyhose. It got a little ridiculous.

This turmoial was resolved in a really simple and wonderful way over the past year. SkirtCafe is about men. But it has gotten out of the business of deciding what is or is not masculine. If a guy is wearing a skirt in public, claims a masculine name and doesn't try to emulate any body parts he doesn't have --- then that guy fits at SkirtCafe. It really doesn't matter whether the skirt is a kilt or a pink poodle skirt, nor does it matter whether he's wearing petticoats, lipstick, pantyhose, earrings, makeup, etc.

The key factor here is that we're willing to wear something that we feel fits our fundamentally masculine gender identity. Since we are all different and we all have different self-identities, we all express that differently. Just like women wear all sorts of skirts that say all sorts of different things about who they are or are not.

Of course, gender isn't so simple either, we now know it comes in lots of variants. But SkirtCafe can take the same approach there. If someone says he's a guy, we'll take it at face value. If someone says he's kind of at a funny point in the gender spectrum but he's comfortable with his masculine name and body, we'll take that as face value too, as "bascially a guy." Same thing if someone says she's a woman --- I don't really care if she's a transwoman or a natural-born woman. But if someone says he's a guy but calls himself "Suzy" and likes to go out for nights on the town as Suzy while his kids are away at choir practice --- well, that's not really what this board is about.

I hope that answers some of your questions.
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