JennC03 wrote:Stevie D wrote:Love all you have written, Jenn!
JennC03 wrote:
...People have always told me that I'll burn in hell because Moon and I are not yoked, even say we'll never last. I'm proud to say we've been together 17 years next December and 15 years married in May. ...
In this context, what does 'yoked' mean please? I assumed at first that people were criticising you and Moon for not being married, but then you go on to say you've been married 15 years.
Not being yoked by the Christians terms they're referring to is: I'm not to be married to a witch or a man that believes as Moon does because in the Bible it states no man should take another God before Jesus Christ. Moon believes in a different God not in the same way that I do and because of that they state we're not yoked.
I must admit to not being privy to these facebook comversations Jenn has where people online tell her she will burn in hell for being married to me. I will write here what I've told her,
those people are idiots. Whether or not Jenn makes it to heaven is NOT up to a bunch of random facebook people.
My own thoughts on the matter:
When I met Jenn I considered myself Christian. Granted I've been somewhat of a spiritual seeker my whole life (which has led me down the road I'm on now), but all the same, at the point where we said our vows, by all intents and purposes we were "yoked". Since then, I have moved on into other spiritual beliefs and Jenn stayed where she is at. That is her right. However it's also (supposedly) against Christian doctrine to divorce. So what's Jenn to do? If she stays with me, they say she will burn in hell, of she leaves me, she burns in hell..
Typical American Christian paradox, and NOW we know where the saying comes from... "
damned if you do, damned if you don't". Jenn, in this situation is a victim of circumstance, and if her God condemns her to hell just for that and based on the decisions that I made regarding my own beliefs, then... well not to be offensive, but that's a pretty crappy religion. Just sayin...
But for what it's worth, as a part of
my beliefs, I can not imagine any deity condemning someone like Jenn to hell just for what I (the husband) believe.
Which brings me to something else Wonderful Electric,
Your family's biggest challenge will be combating the "two cents" of EEEEEEVVVVEEEEEEERRRYYYBOOOODDDDYYYYYY that wants to stick their nose in your family's business! Family and friends on BOTH sides, even the church will attempt to separate, condemn the other, convert, say you need to do this, say you need to do that, there will be facebook wars, awkward family get togethers, holidays will be weird, and any marital problems you have will need to be worked out on your own as you aren't going to want the counsel from a Christian standpoint (they will blame you for being a "heathen"), and she isn't going to want to counsel of a non-Christian, (they will blame it on her faith).
Despite being a non-Christian, we have a tradition that I actually started before I left the "flock", every Christmas I would read the nativity story from the book of Luke. I still do that presently and do not plan to stop. Be the first if need be to reach out to her and be a part of her faith. It doesn't mean you have to believe it yourself, but I don't think you'll burn in "atheist hell" for having a little bible study with her from time to time, in fact you may find it intriguing. I know I do! By doing this, and participating in her spiritual growth, it also gives you a point and boundary that she must also respect, I.E.
not trying to covert you. I try not to throw a lot of mud at the Christian faith, and in doing so, actually uncovered an interesting irony... I started reading the bible and found out how "un-Christ-like" pretty much everyone I know is, and upon doing so I can easily trim most "holier than thou" folk down to size. I also learn a lot from those few Christians who DO actually read the bible and are not dogmatic in their discussions with me. I have a few at work and have even learned a lot from sites like this one. Also, if you do get into the bible, even from an academic standpoint, don't be surprised if you can no longer fathom or tolerate sites like facebook, or cable news channels (Fox News, CNN, etc), politics, and you may even loose all faith in western culture when you realize how hypocritical and f__cked up virtually EVERYONE is! You will learn that the television set IS the new bible! That's my struggle I'm having now.
But anyway, I understand and respect that this forum is not religious or political and I have refrained from a lot of what I would have normally said given the subject matter. But suffice it to say, this doesn't
have to be difficult, just keep the outside world OUT of it and you'll probably do okay.
In a nutshell your family is your own business. How you manage the conflicting faiths is something you're going to have to work out on a day to day basis. Frankly you've already error-ed by seeking opinions on the matter. Ask 10 different people a question on how to handle something religiously, you'll get 20 different answers, and everyone thinks they're right..
A word of note: When/if your wife seeks counsel from other "Christian" folk, there will be a good number who will encourage her to leave you for this reason. Prepare for that. Be sure to have this discussion with your wife.
Zealots can be nasty business, and do NOT underestimate how they can brainwash people like spouses.... You may consider a denomination that will encourage BOTH of your views, such as Universalist Unitarian.