Difficulties with partners

General discussion of skirt and kilt-based fashion for men, and stuff that goes with skirts and kilts.
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STEVIE
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by STEVIE »

A wee rant,
The difficulties are well documented here.
We have reached a "status quo". I wear whatever, she ignores!
Today I was tested for COPD,(nasty breathing problem). Other "stuff" has been ruled out.
I have not smoked my beloved pipes since January 2016.
Mrs K has not asked about the result.
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denimini
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by denimini »

STEVIE wrote:A wee rant,
The difficulties are well documented here.
We have reached a "status quo". I wear whatever, she ignores!
Today I was tested for COPD,(nasty breathing problem). Other "stuff" has been ruled out.
I have not smoked my beloved pipes since January 2016.
Mrs K has not asked about the result.
I am sorry to hear that. Ignoring another's fashion sense is one thing but ignoring their health situation is rather extreme.
Anthony, a denim miniskirt wearer in Outback Australia
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Milfmog
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Milfmog »

STEVIE wrote:A wee rant,
Today I was tested for COPD,(nasty breathing problem). Other "stuff" has been ruled out.
I have not smoked my beloved pipes since January 2016.
Mrs K has not asked about the result.
I hesitate to ask about the result, feels too like prying. However, I will say that I hope the test results are good and that an alternative, more benign, cause of your issues can be found.

Have fun,


Ian.
Do not argue with idiots; they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
Cogito ergo sum - Descartes
Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum - Ambrose Bierce
STEVIE
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by STEVIE »

As it happens, I have gotten off lightly.
Forty plus years of smoking and a "slight" obstruction was the result.
I had 2 chest x-rays last year, both "clear". They were very scary but easy.
This test was hard work.
I'm just glad that I gave up when I did.
Otherwise, I could be telling a very different story.
As for Mrs. K, she has a distinct aversion to discussion in any but the blandest of topics.
That's a familial trait on both sides.
I have seen and realised the damage that silence can cause. I may even be guilty of over compensation.
Mrs K. is still steeped in the idea of "hear no, see no, speak no".
I won't say evil, just any topic that disturbs her view of the "status quo"
Steve.
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by crfriend »

That's good news on the test, sir. I'm happy it fell that way. Likely the missus is as well, even if it's not vocalised.

As far as "speak no", there's usually no profit to be had in lighting the fuse if it isn't really warranted.
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STEVIE
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by STEVIE »

Hi All,
Thanks for the support as always.
Right now, I have a reasonably healthy "status quo".
Six days from seven, I have my choice of skirts.
Within certain limits I can afford to indulge my "whims".
My departure may be imminent, but not expected.
I doubt that I could ask for much more from life.
Steve.
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Kirbstone
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Kirbstone »

Stevie,

I am somewhat perplexed by your last post in which you write: 'My departure may be imminent, but not expected'.

Departure...From this forum, from Life, from YOH? You mentioned that you had given up smoking your 'beloved pipe' in Jan 2016. That presumably was on medical advice and whenever you do it, it can't be a bad thing.
I had a best friend and colleague, very clever man who was also an engineer, at whose wedding I was Best Man. He was a habitual pipe smoker. As Dentists, we are at the front line of early detection of oral cancers and that little area where the pipe mouthpiece habitually rests is particularly susceptible. My friend retired to Spain and reported to me that he had developed an oral cancer directly related to his pipe-smoking. They did the usual radical surgery and I posted him pics. of a cousin of MOH who was hale & hearty some 28 years after such surgery.
Alas, my friend didn't survive even one year and I never did get out to see his Hacienda near Granada. His wife sold up and returned to the UK after he went.

Tom
Carpe Diem......Seize the Day !
STEVIE
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Re: Difficulties with partners

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Hi Kirbstone,
I didn't have any particular departures in mind when I said that.
I just meant that there were none within my immediate future.
However, I am very well aware that pipe smoking did not go without risk.
Oral hygiene and dental checks a very strict part of my life. I had a Great Uncle who had to surgery for mouth cancer in the 1960s.
I guess the procedure has improved since then.
The risk of stomach cancer is also heightened for pipe smokers. That makes me very, very aware of my digestive system and any changes in it.
Now, don't forget lung cancer. The myth is that pipe smokers don't "inhale".
I reckon that I will develop my own health "issues" as I age. Undoubtedly, some will be smoking related, others not.
Starting and stopping the pipe were my choice, the consequences are in my future.
Steve.
PS, we seem to have drifted.
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Kirbstone »

Hi Stevie,

I'm sure you can look forward to a long residual innings, the quality of Life for that duration being the most important.

Getting back on track I have ongoing status quo there, in that MOH is and remains totally anti. For me any unbifurcated adventures must be independent of her and any indulgence undertaken when and where she isn't ! Needless to say that reduces my options considerably, also for me my workplace is a skirted no-go area. I've nevertheless had delivery recently of a bespoke skirtsuit from the Netherlands, which I hope to give an airing when the weather picks up and the Sun remains above the horizon for a reasonably length of time. MOH won't get a look in, needless to say.

Tom
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STEVIE
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by STEVIE »

I'll say Tom, this time.
I guess that you have found your own status quo.
That's to the good and long may that continue!
The sad bit is that your bespoke items could really open up a whole new set of possibilities if only the message could be spread.
My own attempt with the "Nukilt" failed. The company lacked the vision and has now gone bust. It's last big job was for Mrs P..Stevenson-Connelly. A single outfit, loads of hype and little return.
Mrs K has no empathy or sympathy but a huge degree of apathy, she leaves me to get on with it.
Sad to say that my main outlet is work and lucky at the same time.
Also thanks for the "innings", they will be whatever they are. I will just have to deal accordingly.
Steve
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by mishawakaskirt »

mishawakaskirt wrote:I feel like I have hit a wall again with the wife when it comes to kilts and skirts.
I m at a loss as what to say anymore to her. I have worn my kilt in front of her atleast 5 times.
Every time I sence hostility, and know there is an elephant in the room
Skirt and legal skirt is heard often.
I have tried to show her various websites, she won't even look at them.
No matter what I seem to say will her see my thought processes on this matter
Its amazing to me for a person that wears jeans 90 percent of the time. She can't see the obious, why the one sidedness. . I have tried being polite, I have tried being snarky, and everywhere in the middle.
I thinking of going back underground skirting again, its quiet there, no objections from a wife if she don't know. I think its a loss on bothsides, she complains that I don't share with her, my thoughts, feelings, heart etc. Kilts and skirting is a part of me, something I would love to talk about, in depth, but all I get is a hearty "ICK" I would love to talk to her about it, even Superman had Lois Lane
I hate the cloak and dagger hiding it and all. After 25 years of hiding it, I have come up with plenty of great hiding places, problem is I'm just tired of hiding. ( brief history, she knew I had a thing for skirts, I was upfront with her when we were dating.) I knew then it was an important issue then and would always be important to me.

Thankyou for listening.
Update to the above post that was originaly posted on. Febuary 5th 2017 6:30 pm

Tonight as I write this UPDATE. Id like to report maby a small victory. I'm sitting next to
my wife in my black mod Trinity kilt. (she don't know about the fourm)
The small victory is that I have not been verbally insulted for wearing my kilt tonight.
She did voice that she still does not agree with me. That's ok I disagree with her on this topic. Atleast she has been civil today, that's a victory I will take.
And we able to have a little bit of a discussion on clothing in the past, how it was very likely that men and ladies both wore skirts until the invention of the sewing machine. poor people would have likely worn minamally taylored clothing to keep costs down.
Maby not the best discussion, but it's an opening to further conversation.
Mishawakakilt
Last edited by mishawakaskirt on Mon May 22, 2017 3:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Avoid the middle man, wear a kilt or skirt.
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Caultron
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Caultron »

mishawakaskirt wrote:Tonight as I write this UPDATE. Id like to report maby a small victory. I'm sitting next to
my wife in my black mod Trinity kilt. (she don't know about the fourm)
The small victory is that I have not been verbally insulted for wearing my kilt tonight.
She did voice that she still does not agree with me. That's ok I disagree with her on this topic. Atleast she has been civil today, that's a victory I will take.
Congratulations! Slow progress is better than no progress.

Keep up the gentle pressure and avoid angry setbacks.
Courage, conviction, nerve, verve, dash, panache, guts, nuts, balls, gall, élan, stones, whatever. Get some and get skirted.

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Sinned
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Sinned »

misha I glad that there has been one baby step made. I just hope that something doesn't happen to cause a setback. I very much feel for you and hope that there is another step in the near future.

One minor difficulty has passed by. On Friday my youngest son was granted permanent custody of his two children. His ex can still see them and talk to them on the telephone but she has to share the travelling as she lives several hundred miles away. The crux for me is that the threat of his ex finding out about my skirt wearing is now reduced and at some time either I or my son will explain it to them and stress that it's no business of their mother and she doesn't need to know. I feel a bit more free about it now.
I believe in offering every assistance short of actual help but then mainly just want to be left to be myself in all my difference and uniqueness.
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Fred in Skirts »

Dennis, I am so happy to hear of this victory! I know it is a burden you are glad to be done with.
"It is better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not" Andre Gide: 1869 - 1951
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Re: Difficulties with partners

Post by Gordon »

I too have to say that my wife is a little bit more forgiving of my choices of skirts when we are out and about these days. She never had a problem with denim ones as they are "more manly"; now we've been out together in more girly ones. We attended a symphony concert a few weeks back and I wore a black skirt that was definitely not denim along with a feminine top and some heeled womens shoes. I was happy and she didn't mind.
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Namaste,
Gordon
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